How do I tell someone that I cant watch their kid after I told them that I would?

Question

I already have 3 of my own kids, plus I watch my niece every weekday. A friend of my husbands family wants me to also keep her little boy 3 days a week for a few hours between the time she goes to work and the time her dad gets off work. I have two kids in school, ages 7 and 4 and they go to different schools, at different times. I also have my 3 year old daughter and my 1 year old niece. I agreed to watch the little boy too, but now I regret it. I already have so much on my plate and I really dont want to take on another child. But his mom has been so excited to have me watch him and keeps saying over and over again that they had no other options and she didnt know what she was going to do with him if I didnt watch him. I know its not my job to figure out what they should do with their child, but I feel guilty telling her I cant watch him now. I am a stay at home mom to be with my children, but I have so many other things now, I dont get to spend any quality time with them. What should I do???

Answer 1

Just tell her the truth. Tell her that when you agreed to watch him you didn't realize you already had alot on your plate. Its understandable to feel guilty but your a busy women and I'm sure she will be able to manage to find someone else to watch her son.

Answer 2

It took me a long time to realize this, but my kids are the ones that should matter the most to me. period. If I am doing things for everyone else and there kids I can't give my children the attention they need and deserve. You need to be firm on this with these friends of the family and with watching your niece as well. Don't be bullied into taking on more than you can handle. You can tell them how you feel in a nice polite way and stand firm. If they are having trouble finding someone to watch him, say you aren't giving enough notice, tell them you will do it for two weeks until they can make other arrangements for him. Don't back down if you want what is best for your kids.

Answer 3

I don't know what to say about this.  You should have really thought this thru BEFORE you agreed to watch her child.  Now she is counting on you and you plan break your commitment.

If it's only for a few hours a few days a week, why don't you at least give it a chance before you just say "no."  That way at least you can tell the mother you tried it, but it didn't work for you.

If you have two kids in school, you are only going to have one child at home - that shouldn't be overwhelming for a mother who is used to 3 kids.

SO YOU KNEW THAT YOU WOULD HAVE TO "DRAG" ALL THESE KIDS OUT BEFORE YOU AGREED TO THE JOB.  I still don't understand why you said yes if you really had no interest.  Either way - if you are going to break the commitment you need to do it ASAP so the parents can find someone who is willing to watch their child.

Answer 4

i agree with Paula Christine.  

Answer 5

Be honest. Most parents want their child in the best of care with plenty of attention focused on them. tell them that you are not sure you have enough time to give him what he deserves.

Suggest they try the childcare section on craigslist.com

I always see SAHM willing to babysit at great prices. There are always other options for them and you cant be guilted into watching their child.

Good luck!

Answer 6

apologize but tell your friend you know while i thought i could watch your child, i realize im already pulled in so many directions i dont think it would be fair or in the best interests of any of the children including yours that i start watching another child. im so sorry.