How do I train my cat not to attack me while I'm in bed, without reinforcing aggression?

Question

He often play-bites or swats when he's being petted, but when I'm in bed the attacks get vicious and often painful! He gets so aggressive he won't let me touch him to get him off the bed, but I can't very well walk away since he's sitting on top of me. My only recourse is to get aggressive back (just pushing him roughly off the bed), which doesn't make him stop, and probably only makes things worse. Help!

Answer 1

Use a squirt bottle/gun, or grab the ruff of the neck and pinch lightly (like a momma cat would) and shake and say a firm (but not shout) NO!  Don't keep petting him when he starts - immediately do one or both of the above and walk away (I'm assuming you weigh more and are stronger than him), or put him on the floor.  By continuing to try to pet him, or leaving him on top of you,  you are rewarding him for bad behavior.  

Answer 2

I would do what the ALFA cat would do ... and swat him off the bed.  Say "NO" at the same time or "Quit" and then he will associate those words with a swat. or spray.

or use a spray bottle.

It won't make things worse ... it will dicipline him just as an alfa cat would do.  

Answer 3

swat!  The cat learns you don't like this.  It also does not like the swat.  It stops.

Answer 4

water pistol training for aggressive behavior works the best a squirt of water right on his nose will stop him in no time

Answer 5

Don't let him into the bedroom when you are in it.   Crate him or put him in another room.