How do i become less shallow?

Question

I'm worried that I've become an extremely shallow person since highschool, im 19 now. I am obsessed with my appearance and what I wear. If i have a bad hair day or am wearing outdated or unstylish clothes, my whole day is RUINED. I'm constantly judging other people on what they wear and how they looked.

Im worried that being shallow and superficial is taking over my life. i've tried to be less judgmental but i just cant.

whats wrong with me? what can i do to stop being like this? i dont like the person im becoming

Answer 1

You made the first step by recognizing this chronic problem. I would suggest getting closer with your family and possibly making better friends.

You mentioned you don't like the person you're becoming, and with that, I ask you to close your eyes and picture yourself on your death bed... a little weird request, but trust me, and do it. Picture this: you only have about a few hours left to live and you are about to meet God. What do you want that meeting to be like? I doubt you want to tell him you spent your time at the mall and judging others for wearing "outdated cloths."

Alternatively, in the same situation on your death bed, think about what your life would have been all about. Everyone wants to be on their death bed thinking, "Wow, what a beautiful life. I'm so content with everything I have done." Is that the same with you? Do you want to have a life full of meaning? Helping people in any way possible, being kind and loving to your family, to strangers, to even your enemies, these are the things that will make a hero and a legacy.

Abercrombie and Fitch gives you the illusion you're a complete person, but I beg you to seek more meaning in the things I mentioned. This, I believe in my heart, is the second step for you to take. You will love the person you will become when you let go of meaningless cloths. Those cloths will only attract shallow people anyway, and you will be going backwards in your effort.

...appearances fades, but the ever loving heart lives forever... find your heart, and you'll find a better way to live.

Answer 2

You can change it.first don't only date with gorgeous girl only and make friend with good looking friends only.Don't think about what other people look or your look they all just same in God eyes.Don't focus on what you wear and what you have because its not the key in your life,if the shirt and pants is outdated does it matter to your life ?? think abt it fashion is nothing beautiful is nothing the only important is in your heart,you personality.try to do more meaning things, don'tther look or spend so much time figure how to wear and judge what other ppl wear bz its not your business : )

Answer 3

The fact that you can recognise this trait is very important for a start.  I would start by taking little steps.  It sounds to me that you have some insecurities and i think you know this. You could be focusing on your style/appearance etc so you do not have to focus on your underlying issues.  Instead of looking at people and finding the bad things about the way they look, why not try and find one thing about each person that is good.  Just do it in your head to start with and as you get more comfortable about looking at the positives, then try to throw in a complement to the person every now and then.  The people you surround yourself most likely do the same things as you which will not help.  Why not discuss this with them and suggest not being so negative all the time?