How do i become more social?

Question

i just started a new school (my senior year) atthis new school last week. I have always been verrry shy, like so shy that sometimes i have no clue what to say. I usually stay to myself a lot even though i hate it and i do want to be more social and play around like all the other sstudents but i have no idea how!! its so emebarassing too, like so far different boys have tried to talk to me but i really dont know what to say so when they play around with me all i can do is laugh or smile at it. Its differtn when its like just one on one with me and one other person but not in a big crowd or group. Today in class this boy asked me why i dont talk much and asked me like was i anitsocial or something, i dont mean to cut my self off from people but this always seem rto happen and all the boys just like keep asking me why im so quiet but really i know for a fact that i have very bad social anxiety and me being quiet is me just trying to control being in a social place in the first place. I have had it since like 6th grade but over the years it has gotten worse and worse and now its horrible( i would saythe most severe level of it) but people look at me and would never guess that i have this and just assume that i dont like people or that im antisocial. But really im a friendly, funny , nice person when you get to know me. I have almost quit school last year because of it and i know thats horrible (its not that im a bad student bc i have always made good grades and i want to go to college) but i just couldnt get thorugh the day like that, shaking and just appearing awkward to people. And there are diffenrt boys who wanna talk to me but they probably think im stuck up or antisocial. I hate being this way and have thought about suicde a lot, i try to tell my parents that i need help but my daday called me crazy saying that nobody else my age has this and just making me feel bad or even worse than i already felyt about myself .

Answer 1

uppers, stimulents. xanax

Answer 2

heres a lil advice from me lol Jericho- First write a letter to one of the boys in class you know that shows that you can actually write words that you wana say you know Secondly after you talk with that one person for a while tell them how shy and stuff you are Thirdly if they understand they will help you out to become more social they will show you to there freinds and youll get used and more used to it then you will become social Fourth this is better advice then i had beleive me bro gave me this advice -just dont give a **** just say what you wana say- ya... >_> a*****e i know well thats my advice and if you need more help add me on yahoo [e-mail]

Answer 3

Wow that really sucks

Okay, this first advice might seem kind of weird, but it worked for me.

Go somewhere where there are lots people coming and going ( I used a train station and a library). These are people you don't know, and there are no long term consequences for being slightly awkward around them. Just sit next to someone and make an observation about what they are reading or wearing, just something something simple and talk to them a little bit. You'll get practiced really quickly, even though you'll still be nervous for awhile. I'm sort of, the same way, except I'm either really quiet or I cover my anxiety with BOLDNESS. So basically, throw yourself into social situations where you aren't forced to talk to anybody, getting into a simple conversation is relatively easy, and there are no lasting consequences.

Also, try to become friends with at least one person who is more outgoing than you, and you will find yourself picking up their traits. This was the hard part for me, but luckily i just sort of stumbled onto a person like this. Don't be clingy though.

It's funny now, because now some of my introverted friends ask me about this same thing. This is a lot more common than you'd think, especially in high school. Most people that know me wouldn't think I have terrible social phobia. Anyway you are not weird, or freaky, so don't kill yourself. In the long run you will actually be more empathetic to socially maladaptive people.

I hope this helped! Good luck, be brave, and go at your own pace!

Answer 4

Going to therapy may help. All they usually do is find you a therapist who you'll have appointments with on a regular basis. In therapy you can share your problems and try to come up with solutions on how to better live your life. Based on your anxiety level, your therapist might refer you to a psychiatrist so you can consider taking medication. (Medication is usually taken for one to a few years, according to how much improvement has been made.) At first, going to therapy or taking medication may seem a little difficult if you're constantly afraid of other people's response to it, but the truth is that the treatment is only helping you live a better life, and there is no need to be blamed for that, if not complemented. It's not always easy to treat these problems on your own at first, since your brain is used to the old ways of thinking that come with lots of anxiety. Regular therapy and medication (if recommended by a psychiatrist) should be enough to help you get to a level where you can start finding ways to cure your anxiety on your own.

There is a number of other things that you can do on your own, whether it's during therapy or not. Regular exercise and sleeping hours always help release extra tension. Eating whole grains, root vegetables, nuts, leafy vegetables, beans, and high protein foods such as turkey, milk, cheese, and eggs should also help. Overall, diets rich in B vitamins should help you. Reading books plays a great role in helping you find more clues. I would recommend "Coping with Social Anxiety" by Heather Moehn, or The "Chemistry of Joy" by Henry Emmons (The book mainly focuses on depression, but it also gives you great solutions that also work for social or any other type of anxiety.)

Most important of all, you need to be committed to eliminating social anxiety from your life, and the best solutions and opportunities will find you. Just remember that there are many other people in the world who have the same problem, and many who have been able to solve it. Also keep in mind that social anxiety is not part of you or your personality, it is simply something you need to cope with in order to realize who you really are.