How do i deal with my MOM! jesus this question makes me mad! ?

Question

I met my bf back in july and we've been having a great time. we do an ldr and i see him on weekends. so i get to go on a mini-vacation every weekend. and i love it. because i get away from my city and i get to spend time with my boyfriend.

My mom (who i live with cuz i cant afford my own place in this stupid city) looks down on my relationship. on reason is because hes 20. h**l be 21 in march. and i'll be 25 in November. i see nothing wrong with the age gap... we're both mature and we have fun with eachother.

(my ex was 30 and i was 23 when i met him. she looked down on that too)

another reason is that she thinks i waste my time and gas down there because he never buys me anything nice. and she puts him down because he doesnt have a stable job, or a car.

ok.. honestly its not important. he does work. and he doesnt have the money for a car. big woop. hes signing up for his college classes. and he makes a little money working at an auto shop.

he knows what he wants in life. and he has goals. and he loves the h**l out of me. im patient enough to wait untill he has money to buy me things. im not one for material posessions anyways. im all about the love in a relationship.

anyway. every tuesday i come home.. i get nothing but the bitchiness from my mom about this. and its driving me up the wall. she said he's gonna treat me like my ex, and dump me. and i'm just hurting myself.

without loosing my temper and SLAMMING her for all the **** shes done. i just igore it. but im getting really sick and tired of it..

can anyone tell me a way to well.. shut my mom up.?

i calmly remind her im an adult. and i have my own life. but it sucks cuz i have to share a room with her. and i basically wanna kill myself on a constant basis.

thanks guys.

Answer 1

Are you paying 1/2 the bills while you are living with your mother? If you aren't then maybe she is wishing you would get into a mature relationship with someone who will get you out of her house and her bedroom since you don't seem willing to find a place that you can share with a flatmate.

It sounds like maybe she just wants you to grow up instead of hanging out with a kid who is probably letting you pay for things when you go visit him. He has it made. Mommy supports you so you can spend your money on him.

I'd resent it too.

Answer 2

     Don't rock the boat with either one of them. You should go slow, one day at a time, and see where this goes. But be sure to be honest with yourself while you watch this whole situation unfold. Don't "convince" yourself that the boyfriend is great, or that Mom sucks, just cause you are emotiionally caught up in the situation.

Above all, be honest with yourself.

good luck!

Answer 3

Any mom who tells her child that their bf/gf isnt good enough because he doesnt buy you stuff or doesnt have a good job is a S****y parent. they are obviously unhappy themselves and well, its just plain vanity. tell her to shut up about him. say "MOM, dont talk about my bf unless its a compliment or say nothing at all, if you keep talking down on him because your VAIN!, then you will no longer be given info on my relationships, and if i have to i will plain stop talking to you. He makes me happy and as a responsible person happiness is the only thing thats important, money doesnt mean a thing. and thats why your unhappy"

i bet that will do her right, lol. well good luck he sounds like a great guy, and if she pisses you off too much just marry him, that will show her.

Answer 4

I didn't read your story because I saw my Lord's name and got offended. Try talking to him about your troubles...he loves you.

Answer 5

hmmm is she in a happy "perfect" relationship with ur dad or someone else? bc im guessing she's nt and she's just hating bc she is bitter.. and if she is then she's just hating cuz she's a hater. and well if she is alone im guessin she is bc u 2 share a room remind her that at least YOU are trying to be happy and you found someone UNLIKE her i mean talk to her like an adult and thats wha u would say to someone normal that wasnt ur mom u only restrain urself from talkin sht bc she is your mom bt a mom should want u to be happy its nt like U havin a boyfriend is costing her time and money is on u so why should she care you kno. i say tell her lke it is and stop being so nice im not sayin be mean n run ur mouth bc she is your mom bt talk to her like a woman n not her kid ya kno..