How do i deal with my mother in law

Question

i am a family man, i am close to my family, and i love the fact that my soon to be wife is close to hers, but there is one problem, her mother. .. she doesnt like me, never have and probably never will. . . i have always been respectful to her and everything until just recently when i explained to her that me and her daughter were going to b together rather shelike it or not, she jumpd bad at me and i jumpd bad back, i would never put my wife in the position to choose between me and her mother, not becasue im afraid im going to loose, but becasue its not right and no matter who i am i dont have that right, but what doi do? i kan not stand her mother and she just wont step out of our lives ive told my gurl how i feel about it and all she says is things will get better. . . should i just leave her hanging and do me while she goes with the fam or what

Answer 1

Her mother is angry that you are taking her little girl away from her. She is jealous of the love you share with your fiance. In her mind that is love that YOU are taking from her. Sounds like you have tried, Explain to your girl that you will never put her in a place to choose between you and her mother. Her mother should probably realize that if she chooses she is probably going to lose and she will lose contact with her daughter. At this point just stay away from her. Be polite and respectful, if she starts ranting, just smile and turn your back on her. Good Luck.

Answer 2

You've told your mother in law how you feel.  Now it's time for your wife to be your wife and stand up for her husband.  She has been a Momma's Girl long enough, now she has to be a woman to her man.  You need to sit your wife down and explain that you love her very much and you will still be cordial to her mother (like at family events or holidays) but you will not have her in your home one more second if she cannot respect you.  Her mother has to show some decency to you, as you are the man her daughter married and your home is your place to have some privacy and respect.  If she cannot do this then she is not welcome in your home anymore.   You need to let your wife know that you expect her to stand up for you, as her mother is out of line and needs to be corrected, otherwise this behavior will only get worse.  

If your wife refuses to stand up for you then I think it is time you consider whom you married.  When she was saying 'Til Death Do Us Part' she may have been thinking about she and her mother....

Answer 3

if you and your soon to be wife are happy then you are in the right.  your soon to be mother in law needs to get her nose out of you uys business.  Plus some parents never think that anyone is good enough for their child.  maybe you have found one if those mothers.  Just talk to your soon to be wife.

Answer 4

Not sure I got all the jumpd bad part since Im ignorant but anyway I think you HAVE to put your wife in the position of choosing you over her mother because thats what happens when people get married. The spouse HAS to be a priority over the parents. Its called moving on. I think your wife is wrong that it will get better because people like that do not change. The only way it will improve is if you do not spend time with her which I recommend.

Answer 5

confront her and ask what is the problem

Answer 6

Give her time she'll come around...... You should try and get to know her. I'm sure all she wants is her daughters best interests and she may even be a little jealous of you and your wives relationship. After all she had all of her daughters attention before you and now she has to share it with you. I think you need to talk about it with your wife, she knows why her mom has an issue with you.... that will probably make you understand what you need to work on to get her to view you different. Good luck!  

Answer 7

Whish I had a answer In Laws never give up. 1 of 2 choices. Lock her in a closet or hide in a closet till shes gone

Answer 8

You made matters worse by telling her mother that you and her daughter were going to be together whether she liked it or not.  You should have simply kept your mouth shut.  You had no right telling her that.  Your girlfriend's mother does not HAVE to step out of her life.  Whether YOU like it or not that woman gave BIRTH to your girlfriend and she has every right to be in her daughter's life.  If you don't like it then you can step out of your girlfriend's life because ultimately you ARE asking her to choose and as you said, you have no right to do so.

Answer 9

tell  them