Question:

How do i handle my mom's dishonesty?

by | earlier

she's not telling me the truth about her marriage because since i was 11 i found out that she was married to some other guy when i was in another state for a year but that guy went to live somewhere else and was replaced by my dad. i have never talked to my mom about it because she might think I'm snooping into her business but i still think it is totally not fair that she's been hiding that secret for 7 years (7 years!!!) i don't know how to get her to talk to me about it or else our relationship might fall apart or i might even invite for my wedding when i grow up (help!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!)

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Push her down the stairs.
Report (0) (0) | earlier
Maybe you should just tell her what happened when you were 11 and talk to her about how it bothered you
Report (0) (0) | earlier
Pull her fingernails out with pliers!!
Report (0) (0) | earlier
So she is ashamed of her past and doesn't feel like talking about it. Give her a break. I'm sure there are tons of things that you've done and have not shared with her. If she knew you thought she was a liar then she would tell you. All you need to do is bring it up and see what she says. It is the past. Let it go. It doesn't affect her as your mother does it?
Report (0) (0) | earlier
Your moms life and what she believes has nothing to do with who you are and who you can and will be in life.

Let her live her life the way she wants, thank her for the shelter, and continue yours to the fullest =)
Report (0) (0) | earlier
Talk to your mom about it, if she gets angry then just say ok, she clearly doesnt want to talk about it and you cant force it out of her. Good Luck with it :)
Report (0) (0) | earlier
So she got married to some other guy while you were in another state. What's the big deal. The guy wasn't your dad so he is nothing to do with you or your life. She isn't hiding anyhitng - it's just none of your business. Accept that.

You have two people who love you and take care of you. Why isn't that enough for you? Is creating drama more important than having a happy family?

When you get married, you would not invite this other guy anyway - he is nothing to you and never will be. You never knew him.

Once you open pandora's box you can never go back and close it. What's done will be done and the unhappiness you cause.... make sure it's worth it.
Report (0) (0) | earlier
Maybe she just doesn't think to tell you since it really is not your business however since you do know just tell her you know about it and ask her about it. She will tell you then. I had the same situation where I was married before I remarried and had kids but I didn't tell my kids because I didn't see the point (while they were young). I wasn't hiding it just didn't come up in conversation. My daughter found out from her grandpa and asked me so I told her about it and it was no big deal.
Report (0) (0) | earlier
As much as you love your mother and want to know about these things, if she doesn't feel like talking about it, leave it alone. It's her business . . . not yours.
Report (0) (0) | earlier
If your mother is not going to divulge any information there is nothing you can do about it may bee she thinks it's not time to tell you yet. ask her try not to be to judgemental with your interaction with her as this could cause her to withdraw the slightest bit of information she is ready to reveal. when you grow up as you put it you look at things differently, so I wouldn't go worrying about the future as the future will take care of itself. one thing you can be 100% sure of is change and things have a tendency to do just that from moment to moment. I hope you get the answers you want some time soon. Good Luck!
Report (0) (0) | earlier
Obviously she didn't tell you for a reason because it's none of your business! She's an adult, leave her alone.
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The best way is to probably tell her you know some stuff and would appreciate her telling you what really happened. Tell her you don't want to assume and make your own conclusions but for this you need her help.
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IT is none of your business, that is your mom's personal business! If she wants to share it with you she would, leave it alone! What is the big deal? IS it hurting you, no! Who cares, there is other things to worry about then some man your mom was married too. If you think he was your dad then you need to be straight forward with her and ask her that.
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She might be embarrassed about it and would rather not talk. Consider her feelings on it. Yes you want to know...you probably want to know everything but sometimes people would rather keep certain things private and to themselves. Respect her on that...who knows, maybe one day she might tell you. Take Care
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It isn't really any of your business.
Report (0) (0) | earlier
so she was married to your dad got divorced from him and married some other guy when you were away and before you got back she remarried you dad? thats weird. just ask her about it
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Shove it in her face. Srsly.
Report (0) (0) | earlier
   This is like Mama Mia...you don't know which Dad to invite to your wedding! But don't worry about something silly like that, by then you'll be older and more mature...

  On a higher note, your mom is keeping to herself about these things because she cares about you. And, frankly, you are being a bit snoopy. But this is your mother's personal life, and she is trying to find a man that will support his family. Obviously the one she is married to now is not working for her. (He's in another state, so how is he supporting his beloved?)

   Also, you love your biological Dad, right? Be happy that you're living with him, and not some replacement dad from Jupiter (boys get stupider).

   Don't be afraid to talk to your mom. After all, she IS your mom. That's partly what she's there for. Don't ask rudely, and don't answer/ask with an attitude. Listen to what she has to say and speak softly. When your mom understands that you care about her as much as she does about you, she will be more willing to talk about what's going on.

                                 TAKE EXTRA CARE!

                                       -Hopegreenie
Report (0) (0) |   earlier
Really her marriage is none of your business unless she was marrying your man--daughter or not.
Report (0) (0) | earlier
So was this before you were born? I don't quite understand because you say he was replaced by your dad? Ok your mom probably just doesn't want to talk to you about it because she is ashamed of it or something and if this happened before you were born why worry about it? Why were you in another state when you were only 11? It sounds like you have had a rocky childhood, Listen sweetheart, Don't stress yourself out over this just leave the past in the past and if you can't then you need to talk to her about it,

let her know you know about the marriage and what bothers you. Good Luck.
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just tell her straight up that you know some stuff and you want answers

dont be afraid shes your mom
Report (0) (0) | earlier
U WOULDNT B SNOOPING,,JUST ASK HER NICELY IF SHES EVER BEEN MARRIED BFORE AND IF SHE SAYS NO THEN ITS UP TO HER TO TELL YOU THE TRUTH,,MAYB AFTER SHE THINKS ABOUT YOUR QUESTION FOR A WHILE SHE WILL COME BACK TO YOU WITH THE REAL ANSWER,,PEACE
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