How do i tell my friend that i have feelings for her ex?

Question

I have these 2 friends; one of them is like my my close friend that people mistake us for sisters & the other one is my best guy friend! i have known the guy from 4 years and the girl for 6 years. the both of them mean the world to me. they have been broken up for bout a 1 year and a half already but they were together for 3 years on and off. him and i have been talkin for bout a month already. The problem i'm having now is, how do i tell her? or should i tell her?

hmmm! help...

thanks.

Answer 1

tell her. if she were a true friend she would understand after all they are broken up. if she throws a b-fit and says NO YOU CANT DATE HIM, then she is just being selffish not wanting him to be with anyone else

Answer 2

ok just tell her wats going on and tell her how much you like him ive had to do it a million times (not really) but my fare share of them and if she is really your friend then she'll understand so good luck

email me if it works out

Answer 3

ask her if its ok, shes worth more then that :/

Answer 4

Tell her. Theres a reason they are exes. I bet she might mind, but i think its stupid that a couple of best friends have 1 ex boyfriend and the other can't have him. Theres a reason why they don't see eachother.

Answer 5

It depends. Ask her about her feelings about him and see where she stands on the issue before telling her at all. Because most likely, if you do, she will feel very betrayed. Even if she said that it was okay. There's a chance it's not okay. Are you sure you want to act on these feelings?

Answer 6

Talk with your girlfriend first and ask her if she would have a problem with you dating him.  You risk the chance of losing her as a friend if, you do it behind her back.  Since they have been dating off and on you would want to make sure she no longer have feelings for him.  That's what a true friend would do. If you don't care about her feelings then, you are not a true friend and you can go for it.

Answer 7

Old Proverb.

a real friend would not go near friends old flames.

Just imagine how you'd feel.

Answer 8

If it's going to go anywhere with him then you will need to tell her sooner or later. I think best to tell her sooner before either of you get too serious. That way, if (for some reason) she really objects then the two of you can decide what to do based on that (i.e. Leave it because you value her friendship too much, or continue and hope she gets over it).

I can't see any reason why she would have a problem though if they have been broken up this long - unless she still has feelings for him too!!

Good Luck

Answer 9

Just tell her, if he is her ex, then it should be no big deal, it sounds like they don't have anything going anyway, they can't stay together.

If she gets angry then she really isn't much of a friend.  

Answer 10

just tell her

Answer 11

you should tell without feeling shame....if really you would like to make friendship.

Answer 12

try just talking to her,she's gonna find out one way or another and its better if she hears it from you...just make sure he doesnt make the same mistake he did when dating her...and dont expect her to take it too lightly either

Answer 13

1- Check if she likes another guy .

2- Test if she still have feelings for him .

3- If all previous are " Check " , ask her if she'd ever be upset if you like a guy she liked too.

4- If she answer No , then go on ; otherwise , find another guy .  

Answer 14

It really depends how much you like him. If you don' like him too much it's probably not really worth it. And first ask her what she would do, and if she says she wouldn't mind go for it. If she would don't risk it, unless you fall really really hard for him a 6 year frienship wouldn't be worth that.

Answer 15

make sure you like him enough before you go and ruin a friendship, i bet she wont take it will

put yourself in her shoes

Answer 16

if she were a REAL friend she'd understand. just tell her

Answer 17

If you want to keep her as a friend you will talk to her about this and explain what is going on.  Should she have a problem with this or still have feelings for him then you have a whole 'nother situation.  Deciding whose friendship you value most....keeping hers and not dating him, but keeping him as friend only or dating him no matter how she feels and perhaps then losing her as a friend.  It is important to talk to her no matter what or you will lose her as a friend for sure.  Only you can decide what to do in the end...just hope she can be understanding of your feelings too  in this and give you her blessing.  Good luck.