How do i tell my mother in law she is overstepping the boundaries during my pregnancy.?

Question

i already told my husband that i feel we are being smootherd by her. and that it makes me unhappy. He thinks it's me having a problem with her. when really shes just like that, my mom doesn't even act the way she does. how do i approach this situation??

Answer 1

It will only get worse once you have the baby.  Tell your MIL how you feel (politely). Try not to get your husband involved or complain too much to him (it will only put him in the middle).  If you have a beef with her then tell her what bothers you/makes you uncomfortable and ask her not to do it anymore.  You can do it nicely, just don't be passive about it.  I have a MIL who also oversteps boundaries so I know how it goes....

Answer 2

You talking with your husband is the first step in setting boundaries with your mil-good job!  If he won't talk to her, or just blames you, I would limit my contact with her.  I think part of the problem is that she all up in your business.  Don't divulge ANY personal information to her.  If she asks you outright nosey questions, just tell her that you do not feel comfortable talking to her about that.  

I have been having on-going problems with my bf's mom (check out some of my past questions!!).  As a result, I choose not to have much to do with her.  I don't spend any time with her, and I don't talk to her on the phone.  Let me tell you, my stress level has improved dramatically!  She's still trying to interfere with the relationship my bf has with me, but I won't let her.  Don't let her stress you out.  I wish you all the luck in the world.

Answer 3

Take a step back for a second.  Your husband feels your the issue which means his mom has always been the way she is with you now.  Granted your mother is a different type of mom then your mother in law, but did you ever think that your mother in law has no idea that you feel you're being smothered?  Maybe that's her way of showing you she cares.  I would not look to make problems talk to her and let her know that you appreciate all she is doing but are not comfortable with some things.  Let her know you are not looking to take advantage of her and can do some stuff on your own.  Maybe she will back off in a good way rather then make this into a big fight.  

If you are able to be diplomatic about the situation and speak to her with out attacking things could work out to benefit you rather then keeping her at arms length and fighting with your husband.