How do me and my husband get transfered with the air force to save our marriage??

Question

im just wondering if its possible.....hes been stationed in mountain home less than a year...we have been seperated a month now..and we both have been seeing other people..we want to try to make our marriage work...i know this sounds dumb...but we do love eachother..its just the circumstances are very hard to avoid when we are living in the area considering i had seen one of his coworkers to get back at him for seeing other girls...i know it wasn't the brightest idea... should we just let this marriage come to an end..or should we try to make it work ...i feel that the only way we can surpass the previous events is to get transfered to another air force base...with the military allow it...should we let them know our circumstances???

Answer 1

All you have to do is ask. The UCMJ will support your request. As for the whole marriage thing, "till God do us part". Remember?

Make it happen!

Answer 2

You both have acted rather immaturely.  I would suggest your first stop to be Family Advocacy or the Chaplain.  You both have a lot of issues to work out that relocating will not solve.

You can indeed ask to be transferred, but they are going to want to know why.  You can go ask, but I first visit someone to get some counseling.  You cannot count on the military to take care of all your personal problems, especially thse created by yourselves.  What would you do if you were not in the military?  Ask your employer to move you to another state?

Go see the Chaplain and get some counseling and some expert advice.  Don't count on us yahoo's to steer you int he right direction.

Good Luck

Answer 3

He can put in a request but most likely it will be denied.  He can then see if he can find someone that wants to base swap.  But if you do that then all moving expenses are yours, the military will not help you at all (you can claim it on income tax).

If you are wanting this marriage to work then have you looked into counseling?  Go to http://www.militaryonesource.com and they will set up a counselor for you.  You get 6 free sessions and after that something can be worked out.  It is a good start in the right direction and can help you out a lot.

Answer 4

Honestly, it sounds like a serious maturity issue, on both of your parts, and definitely doesn't promote good moral, which is partly where ART134- adultery comes in... WEB is correct, and the good Retired 1stSgt is incorrect, the UCMJ does indeed come in to play, and yes, to avoid prosecuting you guys, the Unit may, MAY, just transfer you guys... but, that being said, it doesn't change the maturity issues... seek Counseling with a Health Care Professional, request a transfer, and if Art134 comes to rear it's ugly head, accept the consequences, as nobody, and I repeat, NOBODY caused your husband to be unfaithful, nor caused you to retaliate in kind... the UCMJ trumps a lot of things that are common in civilian life, making a simple thing an illegal act, and for good reason, it is to promote cohesion, and when something is prejudicial to good order (need I say what it was in this case?) the reaction is much different then in the Civilian world.

Sorry, but 1stSgt, you should have caught that. It does have something to do with it, a bunch, in fact...

Answer 5

The best thing for both of you would be to get the military in on it. I'm not sure what they're called over there, but there are people there to help you in the exact situation you're in at the moment.

Answer 6

First off...even if you and your husband work things out, my guess from the info you provided you'll end up getting divorced eventually.  Being in love doesn't mean you can stay married.

Second, military law considers you both to still be married, until you're divorced.  So that means no s******g around with other people or you violate the UCMJ or whatever it is the AF uses.  I'm ex-Army and had to deal with my spouse leaving me while deployed, so I know.  It's a punishable office for you to be engaged in relations with others while still married the last I heard.  I don't know why that retired AF First Sergeant said it's not a UCMJ issue.  Maybe since the AF is so laid back about things, maybe it's okay for their members to s***w around while still married.

Answer 7

Infidelity goes against the UCMJ -- you could both be sent to MAST - I've seen it happen - good luck -  

Answer 8

You might be able to apply for a Join Spouse assignment.  Check with the Customer Service folks at the MPF.

The UCMJ has nothing to do with this.  Don't know where the other respondent got that idea.  The UCMJ has nothing to do with a Join Spouse assignment, though if you're married and sleeping around it CAN be used against you under Article 134, Adultery.  But that's not what your question was about -- so head over to the MPF and ask about a Join Spouse assignment.

Answer 9

I think Webessu and Libspay may have misinerpreted your question.  

You were asking how to get transferred to another base and not what would happen if you get caught cheating on each other.

Are you active duty also or just him?  

Answer 10

If you really loved eachother and not the money he gets for being married, you wouldnt cheat on eachother.  It is obvious that neither of you care for the simple fact that it has taken about a year and you are asking this question on Yahoo! answers and not contacting somebody in the Airforce. I have spent 27 months away from my wife and daughter IN A COMBAT ZONE (not in Idaho) and the thought of infidelity has never crossed either of our minds.  Marriage is permanent in our eyes.  I gotta feed the fam, and I dont plan on doing this forever.  Do you think that either of you will not throw it in eachothers faces when you do get back together?  I suggest counseling and a sincere scrote check.  This life is not for everyone, and it wont make you rich.  A good place to check is his chain of command.  Tell them everything (especially the infidelity part) and they will understand.  They will help you both out.  What I dont understand is how you think transferring will fix your marriage.  I kinda boils my blood that there are soldiers getting blown to pieces (litterally) in Iraq and the pansies in the airforce have problems not s******g people outside of there marriages.  Its all selfish c**p and I wish you the best.