How do u like mii poem?

Question

i saw the softness in ur eyes; that onlii a few could recognize. with the passion to wanna love, to wanna tame someone so rough.with that one touch ull kno 2 much is neva enough;ull neva wanna give up becuz u kno its her touch that gives u that rush. when u locked eyes and didnt want to turn away; when u wanted to let go of being so afraid; u made sure u held on with a strong hand but not too tight cuz back then, u didnt understand...that she had u with a grip so tight u couldnt escape using all ur might..she touched u and u felt a flash of pain and thats when u knew ud neva be the same and if she left u, that would be it; no more searching for love cuz after her u wont find $h!t..so sit back shawty and just chill and think for a minute what you would do if she left you... how would you feel,would you kno wats real. just be happy shes here shes Gods personal gift to u and dont freak out when she says 'baby, i love you'. shes the main purpose in ur life ur reason 4 livin so dont go making her reason for leaving you cuz u wuz cheatin. when she needed you when she wuz her and remember how she felt when you treated her like dirt.now the tables are turned and u dont kno wat to do : well baby thats karma, the same $h!t came str8 back 2 u ........now u need her more thn eva and thats when shell be there:ALWAYS 'N 4EVER!!!!

Answer 1

let me guess ur a 15 year old girl writing about some made up story about love.....gosh..where the h**l did all the originality go?

Answer 2

i need to agree on harley quinn..the grammar affects the over all delivery..i think it would be better if you just use your native language to express the thoughts that your eyeing...

but the thought is there..need to commend you for that

but it made me think first :P

Answer 3

oh ! now after seeing your poem i learnt that poems can b written this way also ..however writing it self is a very good habit what ever may b the form or from where ever may b the content original or influenced..go on trying..some day people will admire u r writing.

Answer 4

Looks like a song by Poison or Warrant or something

Answer 5

It's not a poem. It's a rambling paragraph.

Answer 6

I have to say, your grammar takes away from it on the whole

people lose the flow and the emotion when they have to stop and figure out what you mean...perhaps you should have some review and edit your poems before you post them...

Its pretty good though