How do you cope when everything gets too much?

Question

I have too many things in the balance at the moment, I just don't know how my life is going to turn out. It's all become too much to handle, so that little things I have to do seem impossible. I can't seem to cope with everyday life now and just getting up in the morning.. It's all become too much :-(

Answer 1

Hi Pixie,

It sounds like you are very down at the moment and it's possible you could be suffering from depression with teh way your describing how even getting up in the morning is becoming very difficult. It could be also very high stress causing all of this.

My best suggestion would be to talk to someone who you can trust, even a family member or friends and explain how you feel and ask for help. There is no shame in it and hopefully they will be able to help you break down some of the problems and give you a helping hand to handle things or at least support you through it. You may also want to visit your GP or see a counsellor if you feel depression is likely and want to have someone outside of family and friends to confide in to help you release some of that inner stress and tension. This is honestly what I do when things become to much.

Best of luck to you and you know what they say- 'a problem shared is a problem halved'

x

Answer 2

Think of taking one step at a time in each area where you are feeling overwhelmed.  If you think of the process in steps then it doesnt look so hard to do in the end.

Remember to talk with friends about how they and you are feeling and to find methods that they use for coping with stress.

Look up some help site's on dealing with stress, look up local support groups or speak with a counsellor.

Keep up with your normal routine such as household chores, shopping, bill paying, work/school, socialising, etc.

Good luck.

Answer 3

Baby steps.  

Answer 4

is there a way that you can drop some things for now and worry about them later?

writing down everything that you have got to deal with and tackling them one at a time is a really good way of dealing with problems. this way it will stop you from trying to deal with them all at once and stressing yourself out.

otherwise trying to share some of the problems with someone else is good if possible, just to get it off your chest.

hope this helps,

good luck x*x

Answer 5

Oh Pixie,

I know what you're going through.

It's not normal, and it's not OK.  No one should have to hurt this much.  You don't deserve to have to go through this.  Go to the doctor.  If you feel like you don't want to even get up in the morning, call someone and have them take you to the hospital.  Ask someone/anyone for help.  If they don't help, ask someone else. Just go get to the doctor or hospital and talk to someone there.  They can help you.

Understand that what you're going through will pass.  It will eventually get better.  Sometimes, that helps make it a little more bearable. But if you're that stressed, you can't be expected to handle all of it at once, no matter what it is.  

Please go see someone NOW.

Good luck, I hope things get better and you feel better soon. :)

Answer 6

Everyone gets like this when nothing seems to have a point an its all too much. Best thing is to take things as they come and look as much as i hate to say it at the brighter things it could be worse and all that. One of the best ways is find someone to talk to doesnt matter who and get things of your chest everything seems better then.

Answer 7

I meditate,i didnt think it would work at first but i learned from sombody,i learned how to control my thoughts.I want you to try this,close your eyes and meditate for 3 minutes try and block all thoughts and think of nothing for 3 minutes.Ok now you have done that what was the result? You couldnt contol your thoughts could you ? No matter how much you tried to think of nothing all you could think about was the negatives in your life? You have to try and block the negative thoughts and turn them into possitive ones.Do this everyday only for 3 minutes when you are feeling down and clear your mind of the c**p when you open your eyes you will be able to think more clearly about your situation and how you can fix it.

Ok i know it sounds a bit rediculous and hippy ish but this is what i thought until i tried it and now i can think clearly about all of the bad things in my life and ive learned to think outside of the box.Once you see the flash of light infront of your eyes when they are closed then this is when you know your 3 minutes is up and the negative thoughs have been erased and you can think clearly.Its a natural anti depressant and h**l yes it works,only a few weeks ago i felt like you do now but now i think that it was rediculous thinking like that when all i have to do is clear my mind.I hope you do this.

Also the second time you meditate think of a river and the sounds of a river flowing along peacefully and imagine that river flows into a puddle and gets bigger and bigger and bigger until you see the flash of light and then stop

Answer 8

Take a breather Pixie.

I feel for you, just when you think things can't get any busier or worse...they generally do.

I surprised myself recently when faced with a 'doozy' of a stressful situation, thing is I normally go into organisational overdrive and turn into a control freak, then break down when alone.

This time I vowed to 'go with the flow' and keep my calm and not let things get to me. It worked! Everyone asked me "when did you get so laid back" and I swear I benefited from it.

I found dealing with one thing at a time helped, but if I couldn't deal with it then I asked for help from another family member.

I can't imagine not having anyone there to turn to, it always helps, no matter how loathed you are to ask them.

I hope this helps you, or at least you get some comfort with your problems.

Answer 9

try to prioritize, sorry don't know much else to say!

good luck!

Answer 10

It sounds like you are stressed at the moment by what is going on in your life and it has got you down.  Most of us do not like uncertainty in our lives, we much prefer stability.

Perhaps try this - list all the things on a piece of paper, and then write against them whether you can do anything about them ie can you change what is happening.  If the answer is no then leave that one.  For any that you answer yes, then write down what your options are, and then look at the options and see if you can decide what the best option is.  Sometimes we don't always know what the best thing to do is, and we just have to jump and don't find out until afterwards.  It may also be helpful to prioritize the things as you write them, because some will be more important than others.  Also, share them with a friend if you can, because when it's our problem are we are in the thick of it we just cannot see the woods for the trees, whereas someone else looks at it with a different perspective and can see more clearly what the options or solutions are.

Another good thing to do is before you go to bed each night set yourself a little list of small goals for the next day.  Then the next day take them one at a time and if you don't get them all done carry some to the next day, or it might be an idea to set one for the morning, one for the afternoon and one for the evening if you get my drift.  If you find yourself getting stressed then take a breather for a little while then go back to them.

I think it is also important to do things which will uplift your spirits because if you are not feeling so depressed you will find you cope better with everything. - doesn't matter what it is as long as it does the job and uplifts you; could be a funny programme/film, dancing round the kitchen to lively music etc   I tend to find that going to the cinema is a great escape from lifes problems. The lower we are the more difficult everyday tasks are.  If it makes you feel any better, when I was severely depressed in hospital and I'd had a really bad day the day before my goal for the day was to do my Freemans return parcel....................and that was it.  The staff told me 'your goal for today is to do your Freemans parcel' - I laugh about it now but it was an achievement at the time.

Try to keep yourself distracted or your mind occupied as much as possible so that you are not constantly thinking about your dilemnas. Find what coping strategies work for you, and also perhaps try to meditate during the evening.  If you don't know how to do this there are plenty of books etc on how to learn.  When I've meditated I've just used a mantra ie a word you keep repeating in your mind.  I found it amazing how thoughts float in and out as well and how it focuses your mind.  It helped me sleep better too.

The other thing to remember is that really none of us know how our life is going to turn out............................we just don't know what is around the corner that we may not be expecting.  I feel unsettled at the moment, because my partner's sons mother has been diagnosed with terminal cancer but doesn't live near here, so he is going to be moving up there in 2 weeks time to help out and also make the transition better for his 11 year old son for when she sadly passes away and we have no idea how long she has.  I cannot go because he will be living in her house so I'm going to be staying here on my own, and will no doubt be asking a question or two around that time myself.  So we are going to try and maintain some form of relationship whilst living 2 hours apart, and I have no idea if or when I will be able to see him.  I have absolutely no idea how things are going to pan out, but I know that no matter how sad I am about it I cannot change the fact that he is going, and I am no doubt going to feel lonely and like a lost sheep when he goes.  So I'm going to have to take one day at a time and cross each bridge as we get to it.

Feel free to contact me if you wish to elaborate more.

Answer 11

Make a list, and be honest with yourself. Ask yourself what needs to be done, and actually take time to figure out how to do everything. It may be tedious, and stressful, and you probably don't even want to think about it, if you're anything like me. But I think the reason you're so stressed out is because you have a lot of unresolved issues floating around in your head, and the best way to get on track is to address them and figure out what they are. You can make a list, even a time table, a schedule of events you're stressed about, for example. Seeing everything on paper will help you not only be more honest with yourself, but make everything look much more manageable.

Get someone supportive, like a parent, to go over it with you, and motivate you to attack your problems head on, and encourage you when the going gets tough, if you will.

I know this sounds cliche, but get a hobby! Preferably one where you can express yourself. A physical activity will not only take your mind off your worries and get you a hot body(!), but will help your body create endorphins to help you feel better.

I can empathize with you, lately I've been feeling the exact same way, and it's not really a new feeling. :P Doing these things have helped me though, and I hope they help you.