How do you deal with a bipolar family member?

Question

I can't take it anymore everything I say triggers an episode and I get hurt in the process and i just can't reason with them, they make it feel like i'm the one with a problem then later they pretend nothing happened and they like to point out my bad features and my faults its soo hurtful :(

i got kicked out of my hosue 2 times for very stupid reasons that weren't my fault, then later I GOT IN TROUBLE.

im pretty sure talking to that person would result in more anger, so i just need ways to calm them down and ignore them when they are being mad and yelling. they used to take meds but they stopped and definitely wont stop again just beucase i tell them to.

any helpful comments are appreciated, thanks (:

Answer 1

u seem lik a sweet girl and  im sorry, idk wut to say but u can always talk to me if u need it :]

Answer 2

I can feel for you.  I know what it is like to live someone with bi-polar. I experienced his with two children I adopted who had bi-polar and until they were diagnosed things were chaotic and it sounds like your experience is a little the same except I'm guessing the family member is a parent? You probably feel a bit helpless .  You might feel like you are cycling with them which can lead to problems for you in more ways than one.  I know what it is like for them to take their anger out on you at least verbally is my experience and then pretend nothing ever happened.  My daughter would have a "meltdown" and I would get all upset over it all, next thing I know she is skipping down the hallway singing.  I felt a bit crazy myself. If it continues  you feel like you are walking on egg shells and trying not to break them by saying or doing anything that will set them off. Which if this continues could cause you great emotional pain as well as health problems.  I guess I can't help you much without knowing more of your circumstances it is hard to be specific.  If they are an adult and have chosen to go off their meds and you are their child  that puts you in a painful spot.  My advice would be to seek out another adult who is emotionally well, someone you can trust to give you some moral support.  But also if you can.. try not to ride the emotional roller coaster with them.  Sometimes I would just sense that there would be a melt down.  If you sense that a mood swing is coming. You can only be responsible for your reactions and not their actions. Do your best to stay out of their way.  But the best way for you to help them calm down is for you to stay calm.    By taking deep breaths and counting to 10 before you respond.  Find something you can do for yourself that calms you like some creative process.  I find that calms me. You can also find a place in your mind (take a while and be imaginative and make this "place" be a wonderful place to visit) so when things get bad you can think of that place so that you can remain calm while they rage. By being calm you will be able to think clearly and stay off of their roller coaster. But if things are really bad, especially if their is physical or verbal abuse and this person is a parent you need to get help for yourself by finding a caring adult and letting them know how things are and they might be able to help you and by helping you.  they will be able to  help this person get the help they need,  to go back on their meds or get help medically at a hospital.

But don't take any of this on yourself. Distance yourself emotionally from their behavior and realize this is their biological chemical inbalance and they aren't acting as they would want to if they weren't bi-polar.  Try to ignore any comments they make that are hurtful because they probably don't mean them. (although this is hard to do)  I hope things get better for you.  Sometimes just having somone to "vent" to helps you to cope better.  ..