How do you deal with "freak-out-know-it-alls"?

Question

Well, my poor baby Tetanka (16.3h paint warmblood) has a huge triangular scrape across his entire forehead after a freakout while unloading from the trailer this weekend. Worse part is this "accident" could have been prevented if a freakout-know-it-all had not have screamed @ me & freaked my horse.

My horse rides best in a slant load at the back, because he gets nervous while unloading & "rushes" out. Trailer owner wanted him at the front, because she felt her car would handle the weight better, it was her trailer/her car so I agreed.

Everyone loads great, trailers well, we get to our destination (a play date at a nice riding facility across town) & start to unload.

By the time it is Tanka's turn he is pawing & getting more hyped up. I walk in nice & calm, pat him on the neck a couple times & start to pull out my quick release knot.

Suddenly this crazy woman starts screaming "Don't untie him! His leg is tied up! Don't untie him!" & she jumps in the trailer & runs up! more..

Answer 1

Is this woman's name Coral?  ROFLOL

There are a LOT of folk out there that have a tendency to YELL.  I'm finding out the older they get, the less they listen so they HAVE to yell.

Several years ago I bought a mare who was hypp who turned out to be H/H and when I went to load her up into the trailer (She was trying to savage most and besides the H/H, I couldn't have that around my horsekids so decided to take her and trade her off.

Anyway, one of my kids (Now a trainer in her own right) decided that I needed help and got a little loud and in "haze" position to haze this mare into a 4 horse slant load.  I in no uncertain terms told her to "back off now", and simply lead the mare into the trailer without an issue.  

Fortunately, I teach my kids WHEN to listen.

Answer 2

Wow... some people NEED to learn about horses. Make sure your horse wears a poll guard every time just to be safe. The next time you see that woman, explain to her that your horse was spooked because of her, and tell her that loud sounds and quick movement can spook any horse, especially one who is excited and stressed. IF and WHEN your horse trailers again, try to make sure the woman is not nearby. If she is coming along, tell  her RIGHT AWAY that you can handle your horse, and if she does see anything, calmly tell you.

Answer 3

i've never had this happen to me, thank goodness, but if i were you i would've yelled at her to back off and to let me unload my horse. gosh,. i can't believe the ignorance of some people. once you got your horse out you should've told her that she's free to leave you alone any time. you should've left him tied in the trailer though until that "thing" calmed down and left you guys alone. if that ever happens again, be sure your horse has a poll protector on, and make sure to make that person back off and jump off a bridge.

Answer 4

Oh my!  You could have really been hurt!

You've learned the hard way to speak up before it gets out of control "Thanks for your input..but can you back off please and let me take care of my own horse in MY preferred methods?!"

When ol' crazy lady was charging into the trailer you should have said "Hold it right there..back out slowly and don't say another word til I have him unloaded.  I have it under control"

I  had someone insist that I HAD to do the stupid Parelli games or my horse was not going to be balanced.

"Guess I should get some bubble wrap then"

Glad you are ok and now you can plan your attack if something like this happens again.

Normally a cordial "Thanks for your input, I'll  keep that in mind" works enough.

I'm really sorry about your experience and now your horse will even have a harder time unloading.  Hope you can work him through his fears and anxiety.

Answer 5

To be honest...this sounds like a genuine misunderstanding. Your horse's leg was caught up and she was genuinly worried.

OK, maybe she shouldn't have dashed into the trailer, but she was acting out of sincere concern.

Also, if your horse "rushes" out of a trailer, you should be spending some quality training time with your horse at the trailer!

EDIT: After reading the rest of your story I repeat my advise. You need to look at whether it was sensible of you to share a trailer with another horse, when you know how badly your horse behaves while being trailered!!

2nd Edit: So, telling the truth is worth 2 thumbs down......so far, man you guys are nuts!!!! Look, at the end of the day if YOUR horse has issues with trailering, then trailer him YOURSELF!!!

Answer 6

I would have whacked her with whatever I could get my  hands on as soon as she set foot in the trailer!!

None of that s*** was your fault. Next time you go somewhere try to trailer with somebody who won't have a mental breakdown about nothing.

As far as dealing with her, just tell her calmly that your horse is a one-person horse, and it's not about her at all, that is if she will listen, but if she's not in her right mind enough to listen when your being that reasonable, she's over the edge and hope is totally out of sight for her.

I have had a similar experience, though, you aren't the only one. So at my barn there were two main trainers, one who is in her right mind and I ride with and another who was totally insane. So we were at a benifit show in town for this one awesome event horse who had colicked really bad and the surgery was way expensive so they held a show to pay for it. We'd brought a few of the ponies down in the stock trailer and four horses in the slant load. So at the end of the day we were loading up all the ponies and the last one to go in was a pony named Cadillac (I know, awful name) who is kind of funny about the trailer and psycho-not-in-right-mind trainer rushes him into the stock trailer and  hardly gives him a chance to look at it, and he backs out all freaked out and runs across the stable so a couple of the girls go and bring him back and now she's pissed and rushes him even worse, and he gets even more freaked out and tries to run off again but she's got a firm hold on the lead rope and jerks down on it a couple times and she's screaming at the top of her lungs practically "I NEED  A CHAIN!!! I NEED A CHAIN!!!" and we're all thinking, no you need a functional brain, actually. But we pretend to be trying to help and so this one girl was like "we have a rope halter but nobody brought a chain" and psycho was like "NO!!!! I NEED A GODDAMN CHAIN!!!"  so we were like "okay" and she's just yanking away at the rope. so the same girl was like "i rode him a couple years ago, do you want me to try to get him in?" and miraculously psycho was like "whatever, go for it." and the girl grabs the rope and the pony steps up right into the trailer.

So pretty much you just have to be as reasonable as you can with the crazies and kind of go along with it.

Answer 7

Did you have any hint prior to trailering your horse that this woman was a hysterical nitwit????  

My two cents...I've got a big QH gelding, 1300lbs,  he rides directly over the double axle in our three horse slant.  That puts him in the middle....our small QH rides right next to the tack room wall, beside him.  They both do really well with this arrangement....If you have a reactive horse then keep the hysterical types away from your horse...my two wouldn't care for her either if she started screaming around...also, both of mine are broke to having ropes thrown at their feet, so having a piece of twine (if that is what was on the floor of the trailer) wouldn't have been a deal for them.  

I'd say yes, your horse might be anxious about trailering, and with experience,he may get a bit better about it.  Just be mindful of whose driving the rig pulling the trailer....that woman obviously hasn't done much towing, you don't need those reactive, novices  around your horse.  

I'm glad that you were not injured; with her screaming around she placed you in an extremely precarious position!!!!!   Don't ever allow her to be the one driving again.  I will say fisticuffs get you no where other than a assault charge levied  against you and this instance certainly wasn't worth that...if it ever is.    Cool Hand Luke wins in my book and it sounds like you handled the situation pretty well.  

Your horse should be ok with trailering..if you have a slant load, just practice loading and off loading...no pressure, take your time...he'll come back around for you.

Answer 8

This was an accident. And, she was concerned about your horse.....Try getting your own trailer if you dont like it. If you dont like it try towing your own horse.

Answer 9

I like Rosi M's concise "back off now!"  You can be polite some other time.  That said, I don't think this lady was so much of a know-it-all as she was concerned and not real savvy about the appropriate way to handle that concern. I think an after-the-fact "Thankyou for you concern" would be the appropriate response to this, and just write it off to her inexperience.  If you had the chance to meet her trainer, you could nicely mention the incident so he/she might address the issue of screaming and jumping into trailers, etc. with her.

Answer 10

Wow... this lady sounds like she's never been around horses before... You should thank her for trying to warn you about your horse's tied up leg. I would politely ask her how long she's been around horses and explain to her that horses are not fond of loud noises and sudden movements. You should also explain to her that rule called never to run up to horses you don't know... Then ask her if she intends on paying for the vet exam he needs after his little adventure. (Okay, maybe not on paying for the vet exam if he needs one, but if she offers? haha)

I hope that Tanka is okay and that lady is educated a bit on horse behaviour and mentalities.

edit: I just read the 'dont spook him' part... is this lady blind as well? A horse RUNNING AWAY is already spooked.

Answer 11

i personally think that this was none of this womans buisness, you know your horse better than anyone else and if i had been in this situation i would have yelled some bad words at her.

again you know your horse better than anyone else, this woman had NO right. and obviously she just made the situation worse. My friend has some of those kinds of people at her barn she boards at in washington. She was running back from a trail ride. (not the smartest but it was a emergency). and this lady comes up and YELLS at her.

i cant stand these types of people and good for you for handling it so well. i would have stuck my foot in her *** and helped her out of the trailer.

Answer 12

I agree you need to spend some time practicing loading and unloading your horse- its really important for yoyr\\ur horse to get used to others loading him too as you may not always be there.   a poll guard could also be beneficial if he is inclined to throw his head around.  take your time and try to stay as calm as possible

Answer 13

I agree that the first may have just been an OMG moment, sees the leg tied up and freaks...knowing he's probably going to rush out...but the rest would have a laxative effect on me...it would irritate the c**p out of me.

My solution is to limit contact with and AVOID such people once they've earned their title.  On the trail, they rank right up there on the sh*t list with the person who brings a novice adult or young child with them, plops them on a horse and rides off to have fun on the trail, leaving whomever behind to tend to the kid's fears/episodes etc.  UGH.

My dear, knowledgeable sister has the opposite problem, interestingly enough.  She is constantly being begged for her opinion, then having to deal with the arguments afterward.

Answer 14

A good punch to the face ought to do it.  Just kidding, sort of.  

We all have to deal with people who "know everything there is to know" about horses.  This woman would be very surprised to hear that she is at least partly to blame for your horses' freak out episode.  The problem with people like that is they think one size fits all for all horses.  They probably never owned a "problem" horse for any longer than it took to sell said "problem" horse.  I know people who will quickly get rid of a horse if it ever puts one foot wrong but will tell me everything they would do to "fix" my horse .

Answer 15

I am sure that I would get plenty of thumb down due to my answer. But if it had been me somebody in that trailer would have had a bloody nose. And it would not have been me or the horses. Ooooooooooooooooo I have come accross a few people like this in my time, and it takes all I can muster not to loosen a few teeth for them. I mean WOW! I am glad that you came out ok and that your horse is only scraped up a bit. You got out of that with only a bit of embarassment, and some people who may think you don't know how to handle your horse. When the truth is, it was the other lady who should have been in the wreck, but thats my feeling.

A few years ago, I was out at the lake with my, crop out pain mare. I like to get out early to miss the idiots...er I mean the crowds. Well I finished my quiet ride with no problems, even had company(a pair of ospree eagles who fallowed me, kicking up rabbits for them). When I got back to my tailer there where crowds gathering. A good 10 tailers loaded with horses, probably 30 riders and horses ariving. No problem for me I'm getting out of here. I unsaddled brushed down my mare, gave her some sliced apples, and was getting ready to load her. When some A@# Hole comes roaring in, and I do mean roaring trailer bouncing. And I thought my God I hope there is no horse in there. Well there was. He get out of his truck and just turns his ill manered stud horse loose. LOOSE! The horse goes running around people trying to catch it, it would turn on people and they(smartly) get away from it. I decided it was time for my exit. As I was loading my mare that stud comes running by and bites. BITES MY MARE! On the neck above the withers, she freaks and skins up her head and backs out almost pulling me though the feed gate of out two horse. Well I was able to calm my horse and get her loaded, before she figured out what was going on(to this day she hates that trailer, she thinks it bit her not the stud). Then I turn my attention to the stud horse owner. By this time he had caught up his horse. Now my wreck was not the only one he had caused, there where plenty of others and people giving him the stink eye. I have a problem I don't just give a stink eye. I walked up to him and informed him that if I ever see him or his illmanerd horse around me again I would personly rope and drag both of them(its not nice but I was fighting mad, and being a roughstock rider, I tend to give into the animal impulse). Well he grined and said who would stop him. Well needless to say, he didn't ride his horse that day. And from what I hear he didn't move for 30 min after I loosened some teeth in his head and tied his horse to his trailer.

People later told me that he called the cops and tryed to get me arrested. But being that most of the people who where there where in wrecks of their own due to this guy, not one of them clamed to have seen me deck this A@# hole.

My advice would be, try not to trailer with that person again. If you can. If you can't. Keep that gal away from the trailer till your horse is out. But not associating with that person would be better. Luck sorry you had to deal with that. I can't stand people who are like that.

Edit- I do have a handle on my temper. Only there is a point where I can't stand it. It is not the method I would recommend, avoidence of those people is the best route. But I have a problem with people who put me and other people in danger due to thier arrogance. I do not go around hitting people, or given threats, I am accually a easy going guy. But, I am a firm believer there are people who need a turn with a rubber hose. Its not the nicest way to put it, and when you are dealing with a 1,000lbs+ animal sometime, being nice is not a possibility.

Edit- Ha! I see the trolls are out putting thumbs down to all those answers that are not warm and fuzzy. Guess what life isn't warm and fuzzy.

Answer 16

yeah i probably would blame it on the lady too hahah but still horse are unpredictable

and i think the lady was only trying to help and since she doens't know anything about horses you can't blame her yeah i would have told her to get out of the way alot sooner

next time try getting a pole protecter..i think thats what they are called it's like a big pad that sit on top of there head..at leadt it can give him more protecion ya know?

sorry to hear about this aweful experience

your poor baby..he got so scared.. wel i'm glad you finally regained control! better luck next time!