How do you deal with your mother-in-law and sister-in-law?

Question

My husband and I got married last Friday and his mom and sister have made it clear that they are not happy about it and that they do not want me as their new family member. His mom just got here 3 months ago from guatemala and is already shunning me. His sister has always had an attitude problem is sure that I need to bow down to her will. My husband is very close to his mom and sister. What do I do? Should I just give them a good smack? Or be nice for the sake of my husbands feelings?

Answer 1

Just know that you are married to your husband and not his mother.  Be kind to them for your husbands sake but if they are really bothering you, tell you husband.  If he can see how upset you are he might say soemthing to them.  Just because he is close to them doesnt mean he wont listen to you.  You are his family now.  For the time being just ignore them as mush as you can and when you have to be around them just try and be nice.  Dont stoop to their level.

Answer 2

It's up to your husband, he can sit his family down and tell them the way it is, (I'm married, I love her, accepts it), or you can go through h**l.

Last I check, you married him, it's his job to protect you, that includes protecting you from his family.

Being nice to them won't help, go ahead and be who you are, you have virtually no control over what his family thinks, acts or behaves........(I'm not suggesting you go postal, or yell and scream at them, you can be polite, just be yourself).

Luck

Answer 3

I think it is best to Kill them with Kindness, be the bigger person here. After a while, you never know, they might come around and see that your a good person.

Answer 4

I understand how you feel. You want to all get along and be one big happy family. But the fact of the matter it does not always happen that way. I think you should be nice for the sake of your husband and your marriage, but does your husband know what is going on? And what is he doing to improve the situation. You are his wife now and should be first in his life.  

Answer 5

I'd have it out with the whole family.  Your husband married you and you married him.  His family is now you and his mother and sister are his extended family.  Why don't you tell your husband how you feel and then talk it (or yell if they won't listen!) through with them.

Do not bow down to his sister or his mother as if you do it once you will be doing it for the rest of your life!  You are their equal!!!

Answer 6

They're his family and you have to respect that fact.Smacking will not solve any problems.Just make it worse.Be as respectful and considerate as you can be and pray for the best.

Answer 7

You need to let your husband know how you are being treated by his family and how you feel about it.  Then it's up to your husband to defend you and put his mother and sister in their place when they start to mistreat or disrespect you.  You shouldn't have to defend yourself nor try to be extra nice to them.  That often doesn't work. Just be yourself.  If they don't like you, then it's up to your husband to be the mediator.

Answer 8

I think you should sit down with your husband and address the situation head on that way when ever the three of you are together both of you are prepared to deal with them. The two of you need to be on one accord, and on the same page, that way they can't try to brain wash him into thinking bad about you. express to him that you don't have any problems with his family and that you are willing to get a long with them but you won't allow them to treat you like c**p, he should support you. Now that you guys are married his family has to support you guys as one, or leave you both alone. They don't have to like you but as his wife and better half he should accept nothing less than them respecting you. Maybe he can go and talk to his family and bridge the gap, but since he is the common denominator (not to mention the man) he has to make peace, otherwise there wise there will forever be war. Good luck!

Answer 9

You need to be nice to them even when they are nasty.. DO NOT stoop to there level. You don't mention where your husband is with all this, does he see them being nasty or does he think its all in your head??

He may be close to his mom, but when he said "I do" he cut the apron strings and you are now the woman in his life. Very important that he remembers that!

Answer 10

Be nice to them for your husband, But dont take any c**p from them. Your husband shouldnt want you to.If they get too bad then it's your husbands responsibility to step up and say something.

Answer 11

OMG, that's awful.  You really need to get your husband to stand up for you.  His mom and sister won't care what YOU say but if HE says, "Look,  she is my wife and I love her so lose the attitude and treat her nicely," or something to that effect, they will have to pay attention.

Please do whatever it takes to get your husband to stick up for you right away, or this kind of cr*p will go on forever.