How do you discipline a nephew that is uncontrollable?

Question

My nephew lives with his mom and has supervised visits to see his dad. My sister doesn't ever "say no" or "reprimand" the almost 7 year old (first grader). She often is very permissive and self-centered allowing her son to do whatever he wants. But my nephew comes to my house Saturday through Tuesday for baby-sitting while my sister works late nights because she does daycare only three days a week. So when he's at my house he spits, burps, kicks, screams, throws tantrums, and refuses to do anything except "Watch TV, Play on the computer, or go in the kiddie sized pool outside."

Answer 1

It is not your nephew's fault he is totally undisciplined.  That is your sister's fault.  You however have no right disciplining him since he is not your child.  The only thing I can suggest is that you tell your sister you will no longer watch her son until she starts disciplining him.  

Answer 2

Since you are providing the child care for your sister for free or at a reduced price, I'd say that you should discipline him as if he were your own child.      Don't falter.     If your sister does not like it, she is free to find other child care.    Don't feel bad.     Do not let this child ruin or stress out your evenings.  

If he spits, kicks, screams or anything else, tell him that behavior is not allowed in your household.     Demand that he apologize to you/the entire family for his behavior.    Order him into time out.   I'd say 10 minutes at a time would be sufficient.    Make him write some sentences.    

Ban pokemon cards from your home.     Simple.     I don't think that they are necessarily bad.    It's like anything else, when a child is given unlimited material things (pokemon cards, game boys, laptops, ipods), they don't really learn how to interact with others or learn appropriate/acceptable behavior.     In my opinion, all of those things are fine, but in moderation.     If you don't want him playing on the computer or watching t.v., say so and don't allow it.      You may suffer some since you are not getting to watch t.v., but eventually it will even out.  

Suggest that he bring a book or some art supplies.   Tell him that you are banning electronics and everyone will be doing something to broaden their horizons.     Book reading, puzzles, play-dough, art.      School will be starting soon and education activities would be a good thing to work on in the evenings.       Tell him you are going for a walk or a bike ride and he's going too.     So what if he doesn't want to, he'll come around.    If he doesn't want to ride a bike, let him walk.    Again, no ipod on the walk.  

  

I'd say your nephew has came by his attitude honestly by the way you describe his mother.     Kids need/want discipline.     They don't think that they do, but they do.   Kids would rather have quality time with an adult than 300 pokemon cards.        

Consistency is the key.    He'll learn.....at least how to act in your home.  

Answer 3

maybe id cry in front of my uncle but i am a very emotional person i WOULD NEVER disrespect my family like that. you need to take legal guardianship

Answer 4

give hime acouple of well placed smacks on his butt

Answer 5

I KNEW better than to EVER act like that at my Aunt and Uncle's house.they would have wore me out!THEN I would have gotten it from my parents.

Discipline them as if they were your own kids.If your sister has a problem tell her "Fine, get someone else to take care of him but WE are NOT going to put up with his bad behavior, he WILL mind us when he is here, or get disciplined or not BE here!"

Do not argue with ehr, just INFORM her.

Then also tell ehr, you think he is bad now wait until he is 15 and turns on YOU.

Answer 6

Do not let him watch tv or do anything of that sort until he starts to behave better.

Explain the rules of your house and the consequences for breaking those rules.

My sister use to be the same way with her oldest, not really correcting his behavior, or punnishing him.

She has since learned better and he behaves much better.

Just stick to your rules and give him the appropriate punnishment.