How do you feel about registering for wedding gifts?

Question

I'm getting married September 12th, and I'm mailing the invites out this week. My friend suggested to me that I include a gift registry in the invitation. I don't know, though. I mean, I feel like a jerk. Of course it would be great to get gifts for our apartment when we move in after the wedding.. but I dont want to seem like I expect gifts, ya know?

So what is your opinion on this? Did you register for gifts for your wedding? How do you feel when you get an invite with a gift registry included?

Help!!

Thanks!

Answer 1

Just put something in the invitations saying you're registered wherever you decide to register, but have it say that gifts are optional - Something like "your gift is your presence, but here's where I'm registered just in case".  Lol.

Answer 2

I would recommend registering somewhere, but you never ever put registry information in your invitation. Only putting the information in bridal shower invitations is acceptable.

Answer 3

My suggestion is to go to theknot.com and set up a bridal page. Then include where you will be registered.  Include the bridal web page with your wedding instructions (maps,etc.).

Answer 4

We didn't register for gifts for our wedding. To me, it just seemed silly. Some people say they register because they are very particular about what they want - but my husband and I were not shacking up, we each had been on our own for years and years - and just hardly even thought of what gifts we would get; it just wasn't on our radar.

Of course we did receive many lovely gifts of all kinds, and we accepted all graciously and were very grateful to our family and friends. We did get a few duplicates, but just put those away in storage (it was really nice, a year later when the coffee maker broke, just to be able to go into a box, and pull out a new one!).

For us, the purpose of our wedding day was to invite family and close friends to witness our vows, then celebrate with us at the reception. Gifts were a bonus, trust me.

For weddings we attend, I may look at the gift registry, but never buy from them.

Answer 5

I just threw my best friend a shower, and most places she registered just gave little cards, no bigger than a business card. Where they wrote their name and registry number. So then they could just take that to the store and look it up. Then you aren't sending a big list or anything, just a little card that they can take to the store.

And the majority of people register for gifts. I think people would be confused if you DIDN'T register.

Answer 6

You registry for your gifts for your shower and you will get some gifts from your registry. Or include it in your website. Just don't ask for money last two wedding they register for money rude.

Answer 7

Don't include anything in the invitation...word of mouth is the way to go.  I didn't want to register, but I was URGED to by family and friends that like to buy from a register.  I registered for about 20 things, that's it, for those people that wanted it.  I'm not a fan of registers....but, you may want to create one for those that have to have it.  It's a hard call, I know.  Best wishes.

Answer 8

It's proper etiquette to register as soon as you're engaged.  You should have your dishes and flatware and things all picked out so your guests can take a look and buy you what you need.  And no, it does not go in with the invitation.  The link below will help you.  

Usually, when the couple announces their engagement via the paper or a web site, it's OK to mention where she is registered.

Answer 9

Well u can do a variety of things just be registered if u really want gifts but put were registered at blah blah blah and a gift is optional ur prescence is all we rally ask for...or u could do a money well/tree and put no registry but there will be a money tree at the reception and thats where u have a lil wishhing well thing u can buy them at party places and guest secretly put in closed cards with items inside i.e. gift certificates or most of the time cash....and if u dont want anything but wanna give them the option u can register to a charity and put it in ur name and say donations would be appreciated...

Answer 10

To be honest, I love it when it comes, that way I head to the store get what they want and get on with my day. We got married last year, and sent our registry list in the invitations. Some people thanked us, and everyone did not seem to mind. I think most people should understand its implied that we want you to celebrate our day with us, and that your not expecting anything in return from them, but if they want to give you a gift the option is there. You might want to register at more than one place. Try something nice that you really want, but also somewhere affordable. Walmarts has a great registry people can just go and print it out at the kiosk. This way people who can't afford a lot can still get you something you want. All in all we had a blast registering for things. You can go shopping and not spend a thing. We put some things on their we new we would never get, but it was fun just to do that. Also if you go somewhere like Bed, Bath and Beyond the offer $25 to the people that recommended you to their store, and then monthly they will send you out a 20% coupon of your registry that is left after your wedding. Most places also offer little tags that fit into the invites that are made to get shipped out when you invite your guests, and their free, just ask. JCPenny offers a free bridal planning guide and frame, just for registering, that is where my best friend registered. You want to give your guest variety, but not make them feel overwhelmed either.  GOOD LUCK

Answer 11

Well it is your wedding you know ... and you know you want gifts so why not just go ahead and let them know where you are registered? Many people do put the places where they register . Think of your favorite stores of you and your husband and register and put it on the invitation. Many people who are invited do not know what to get a couple or they don't know your taste also some might give you something you already have and worse you might get the same gifts over and over. Its just a suggestion hat your giving to the people your inviting and i think its helpful. If I was going to a wedding I would like to know what the couple needed, or wanted... I would like to know their kind of taste and style... even if i don't purchase anything from the registry at least you come out with a clue. Don't feel bad about it it's expected

Answer 12

h**l yes! most people get you money for your wedding anyway... but at a bridal shower (which in your case would take place on the 3 or 4th week of aug) people bring gifts from your registry. people are going to buy you gifts. this way they know what to get you. you can go to the store or do it all online. its fun!

i would go w/bed bath & beyond. they have most all things online and in the store. they have a great return policy, you can sign up for coupons AND after your wedding you and you groom get 10% off anything you buy off your resitry that you didnt get in gifts.

dont go with target. about 1/2 the item you register for online you cant get in stores, if you register in the store a ton of those items dont have photos online. not to mention target notorious ly HORRIBLE return policy.

Answer 13

Most of the time to all the weddings i went to their were gifts. Unless it was a huge church wedding with everyone.. in a small town.

Just put it down as an option thing...

Say like if you would please to give us a wedding gift here is where we are registered at. ect.

Answer 14

When I got married, I didn't register at all.  To me, that is saying "Im EXPECTING gifts, and here is where you can get them" but im not expecting gifts.  When I tell someone I am getting married and/or invite them to the wedding, the only thing I am expecting is their best wishes and their happiness.  If they want to get me something, good on them!  

My friends and family knew that my (now) hubby had been living to gether, so we didnt need many house appliances. and if they gave anything besides money, it was usually a gift card to bed bath and beyond or another home store like that.

I have never had someone include it in their invitation, but if they did, I wouldn't think less of them.  I just know that its not something I would do.

Answer 15

Most people do register.  And msot people will bring a  gift for you!

But you do not mention a gift regisrty in a wedding invitation.  It is bad etiquette to do so.

Instead do a regisrty at a store or two for things you need and want.  then make a wedding website (theknot.com) and you can list the registries.

Answer 16

Register for some items so those coming to your shower can get you something you need/want rather than guessing. Don't include this registry info in the invite, though. People will ask your mom or wedding party where you are registered. Don't worry, they will find out. :)

Answer 17

it is fine to register for gifts. but it is a tad icky to mention it in your invitations.