How do you fight social services in not going for adoption?

Question

my son was put in foster care when he was 2 weeks old, he is now 15mths old and is still there my mother is fighting so my son goes to live with her my mum has already got 2 other children of mine living with her, social services have allowed my mum to bring up my 2 eldest but are going for adoption for my youngest, this is not fair as they are spliting the family up, we want suggestions on what we can do in order to make sure social services dont get the go ahead in the court for adoption

Answer 1

My friend has adopted two children and Social Services were trying to get them to go to the mothers family but the judge ruled they should be adopted.(Their mum was an alcoholic and drug addict).

Usually Social Services will try to keep the kids with the   family so I think the best thing you can do is to be co operative with social services and let them know that you feel it would be best if he could stay with your mum.(Dont ever show any signs of aggression etc)

I really feel for you because I saw a programme recently about social services taking kids away from their families and the poor mothers had no way of winning.Maybe you could contact your local M.P and ask for his/her help.

I do hope it all works out well for you and your son.Good luck xx

Please do contact the association Heather is talking of.She is dead right in what she says.

Answer 2

you need to find out why they believe your mother is not a suitable placement, does her agee go against her? None of us really know much about your circumstances but if you believe that the best care for your son will be that from your mother then you should fight.

I wish you luck and I hope the right decision is made for your litle boy, whatever that decision is.

Answer 3

I know it sounds wrong, but perhaps they feel your mom has enough on her hands with a little one. But if this baby has been with the same foster family since 2 weeks and they are the ones who want to adopt him, then I say think of the child. I know its hard but again, think of the child.

Answer 4

Are you in the UK

If you are, they probably have adopters lined up for your baby. I'm afraid you may be a victim of the system whereby the local authority is getting a 'bonus' for every child placed.  They have to meet a target to reduce the numbers in foster care and they get a cash bonus.

What they are doing is catering to the adopters wishes for a baby.  So families are losing their babies and the children in foster care are still lanquishing there.   It's not working.  The government targets need to be abolished as in practice they are not in the best interests of the children and it has not reduced the numbers in foster care at all, It has only increased the number of infants being removed from families at a staggering rate, since the target incentives came into force.

There is an organization who can help your family - I will find out and edit my answer for you.  Best of luck with keeping your family together - but your mum really needs someone fighting her corner, they will fight you right up to the courthouse steps, but never give up

ETA My brilliant friend has informed me that the organization you need to contact for help is http://www.fassit.co.uk/   contact Mr Frost, who many put you in touch with Mr Hemming, depending on your jurisdiction

Answer 5

That is unheard of, usually, at least in my province they always place with extended family if at all possible.

You have to go to court, get a lawyer.  If you cannot afford a lawyer, there is legal aid.  

There may be reasons though social services is doing this, maybe your mom's house is at capacity.  

I also hope you are getting the help you need to get your life on track.

Good luck to you and your mom.

Answer 6

U need legal advice... thats the only way to fight an enforced adoption.

You have 28 days to appeal after you have been informed of the pending adoption...& no amount of crying about it will help without a lawyer.

Having been a foster carer & had children being adopted.. i know that ur chances are slim.

But your mum can fight for this too, if she can prove that her taking on parental responsibility has been beneficial to the other children & that their lives have not been effected by this situation.

May I suggest... .. that you make this your last child?

Answer 7

From what I know of the process, Social Services (the SS!) look for family structure.  

Can you show a strong network of relations and very good longtime friends that are nearby, integrated into a regular routine with you, your mum and the children?  The sort of things they look for are:

Regular visits to and from aunts, uncles, grandparents, good friends all with 'like' children.

Evaluate your families regular routine does it have anything like this?  If not, seek to increase this kind of family integration.

Good luck