How do you get a 6 year old to be more helpful around the house?

Question

My son is 6 years old and as he has gotten older he has gotten lazy! My husband and I have tried everything to get him to help out more around the house. He just wants us to do everything for him. He is supposed to be responsible for his playroom and his bedroom. Getting him to clean these rooms is turning into WWlll. Any ideas would be great. We just want him to do his part now that he is getting older and see the value of being self reliant.

Answer 1

get a sticker chart. for every time he makes his bed without being told... star. for ever time he puts his clothes in the hamper without being told... star. and at say... 20 stars he gets a suprise.

do the "5min clean". set a timer and try to help him (don't help TOO much) pick up as much as he can. and don't force him to do more if he's done a decent job... it's not a big deal if he didn't get to his bed... then let him go. I turn my kids TV shows off in the middle of a commercial and say it won't go back on until it's done. and with it only being 5 min it's not too long.

set a restriction on it, like... if you're room isn't clean then no saturday morning cartoons. and stick too it. it might make for one or two tantrums but stay calm... he'll get over it and eventually clean.

when you do start getting him to clean don't forget to reward him. even something simple like getting his favorite popscicles when you go shopping or extra time to stay up at night or a favorite movie at the library.

the supernanny is a great way to get ideas too... her books are just full of them.

http://www.supernanny.com

Answer 2

First, get one of the chore charts from the store.  You and your husband write simple sentences about the chores  that you want your son to do.  For example:

1. Pick-up all of toys in playroom.

2. Make bed each morning, etc.

As each chore is completed, have him tell an adult and have him check it off while the adult is watching a praising him.

If possible, buy a bank.  At the end of the day when all chores are completed, put a coin amount that you are comfortable with.  5, 10, 15 up to 25 cents.  At the end of two weeks or four weeks,  allow him to go to the store and spend only half of the money.  Explain that the other is to be saved. I used a second bank that they could drop the money in and it would calculate.  It was see through.  This will also teach him about saving.  If he sees something at the store that is over his "budget,"  tell him he has to continue to do his chores to earn money.  Chores not completed will result in no money.

Good luck!

Answer 3

All of my children help around the house, but getting it started was not easy. I will use the example from my oldest because he was the most difficult. The others just see that chores happen and hate doing it but they do.

Well I would say when you have issues with him doing the chores you think he should do, then show him what happens if everyone doesn't do their part. That's what I say over and over again. If mom doesn't clean the clothes they don't have anything to wear, but if they don't bring it to the laundry room then I wont clean it, and it is their fault. We were going out one night and 2 of them didn't have shorts and they saw for themselves that it was because they didn't bring it to me.

I learned from my mom growing up if I didn't do it, she wanted it done so she would. Well I am not that way. I will not just do it for them. Some parents don't have the patience for that but I have just gotten that firm.

I have kids from 11 to 2. My 3 oldest are 11, 6 and 7 and they do various chores. They fold their own clothes... We do hangers for it all, and feed the dog. The oldest does trash and has started to learn dishes. I make them realize our house flows well if we all do our jobs. And that if chores go well then we do things like movies or rent games etc.

Try picking a new chore, like sweeping the kitchen, and then let him have some gummies bears when he does. He will start to relate a mall treat to his chores. The room is an old fight, but after introducing him to something different and getting some gummies, then let him do something else like wash the table. Then he wont see the chores as so bad. Then move into the room and tell him to do certain things at a time. Example: I have them go pick up all the legos. When they are done we have a drink and then they go back and pick up all the clothes, etc. We take small breaks and it seems like a smaller chore.

I wish you the best of luck and I applaud parents that encourage responsible children. It is a great building block and I get a lot more praise for my kids doing chores than I do mean remarks, and I get a lot of compliments of my kids behavior!!!!

Answer 4

-Make it a game like "The 10 second tidy" or the Everybody lets clean up song, make sure everything has a designated place

-Pick your battles, maybe just get set aside a certain time of day or less to pick up all the toys instead of the minute after he plays with them, 6 year olds have short attention spans

-Reward him every Friday with an allowance or treat or some sort of privilege, if he keeps his room and play room clean

-Take away some of his toys he likes most for about a week and say you'll give them back when he learns to take care of his things and put them away

-If all else fails put everything he likes into a big garbage bag and hide it till he promises he will put everything away and he's done playing with it

As much as Stormy S is exaggerating about how you treat him like a maid, helping him out a bit or at least being their with him encouraging rather then hounding him could make a positive difference.

Answer 5

He is a 6 year old child not a maid service!  Kids clean up on their own timetable, stop hounding him about it.  The more you hound the longer he will be "lazy".  HELP him clean the playroom...again he is a CHILD not an adult.  His bedroom just shut the door.  Again if you want a maid hire a maid service.  This is a child for crying out loud.

Answer 6

I don't have children, but maybe if you turn it into a game, find a creative way for him to clean his room. You may want to reward him after he does it by giving him his favorite food. Praise is a big thing, if he sees that you are excited about something he did he will build off of that. He probably knows if he doesn't clean it up that someone else will. If that isn't the case then if he doesn't clean his room or playroom, take away what he doesn't pick up, don't replace it. Eventually he will want his toys back, and make sure he understands that if he wants to play with his toys he will need to put them away when he is done. Hope this helps.

Answer 7

Easy one!!! You have to make him feel like he's being a huge help to mommy. It makes him feel like he has a purpose and a big purpose too!! Always brag on him infront of him to others about the way he helps and things he does to help around the house. Over exaggerate it a little on what a huge help he is. This works like clock work with my son. That's something about kids is you have to learn how they think and know what buttons to push. To have a helper for life you shouldn't pay him or bribe him too much cause then he's just doing it to get something in return so he's not really helping out, he's just getting paid, ha ha. It could send the wrong signal. One more thing, the strong approach is tell him if there is anything in his bedroom floor in 1 hour you will assume it's garbage and out to the garbage dump it will go and follow through with it, I did that 2 times and that's all it took but you gotta be strong and not go digging throught the garbage when you start feeling guilty, just keep reminding yourself the reason you are doing this and how important it is to raise him to be a responsible mature little man on day.

Answer 8

Reward system- no, not bribery, rewards. When his room is tidy by a cetrain day of the week then he will get his pocket m oney or allowance or whatever you want to call it.

If his chores arent done, he simply doesnt get the money, hence, he has to earn it.

Answer 9

Rewards!

it will be hard a first but it WORKS!

If he likes candy, or certain toys, or tv shows, games, playing outside. Every thing the child enjoys is game for use in rewards.

Give your son a simple chore, WITH YOU, (until he gets used it it) Make it fun, and make it clear that after wards he gets the reward. If he dosen't do what he was told he dosen't get it. He'll cry he'll push, but you have to hold fast and NOT give in.

Give another oportunity if he failed, make sure it's something simple, so he gets the idea. "Oh! If i go put my block in the bucket i get a treat, or i get my superman toy."

When they're of age and they start wanting toys from the store, use money, It's a great way to teach respinsablity with money. Give the child three envalopes, one for giving, one for saving, and one for spending.

Each week your child has certain EXTRA chorse they can do for money. There are things which are expectations like, picking up toys and such. But extras like, sweeping up the kitchen, wiping down the counters, ect, are all things you can put on this list.

At the end of the week they bring hte list to you and you count out how much the child gets. Then you teach them how to make sure some gets in to each envalop. Set a goal, a toy the child wants to buy. Maybe it costs $15 plus tax. Build up the excitment of the child earning the money to make the purchase. That goes in to savings - and dont bail the child out on the sales taxs. its life, make sure they have all the money. if they don't have it, they have to do more chorse to earn the money before they buy it. And NEVER do a "just pay me back" don't need to teach them to gut loans at a young age.

Make it a special trip when the child has enough money, make a big deal out it, it will make it easier next time, and they will get excited about doing extras around the house and help.

They'll learn that they can give to their church (or to a cherity to learn how to be a giving person) by putting money in the give envalope. They'll learn to save for a goal by putting money in the save. and they can get instant gratification for smaller things like penny candy by putting money in the spend. If they want to put more in the give and save, let them, but make limits on the spend envalop so that they learn they must save a certain persentage.

This idea is from Dave Ramsey. It's a great way, and really works!!

Something my mom did that helped out my siblings when they had trouble is limiting the toys. a bunch of toys out, put them in buckets and store them. each month, switch out another toy bin. It's like having new toys every month. Obviously dont take away the favorite teddy, or the toy he plays with every day, all the extras. It limits the clean up time, the time it will take the child to clean up, and keeps it all exciting for the child when a new box is rotated out.