How do you get a child to bed without fears?

Question

My daughter is 4 years old. We have moved her to a twin bed and for some reason she is scared of it. We put the side rails on it to make her feel as if she wont fall off but for some reason she is afraid that she will fall under the mattress which is on the floor right now with the side rail so it wouldn't be a far fall but she thinks the mattress will go on top of her. She is also afraid of monsters suddenly which I really don't know where that came from either. I don't know what to do she keeps freaking out everytime we put her to bed and it takes her 3 hours to finally calm down to fall asleep. We have never had sleep issues with her until now and My husband and I are at our whits end with her. We try to calm her down we read stories, we sing songs and we also just lay there quietly in hopes that she would too but nothing works. I want to make it a positive experience for her and we have tried a lot of different things and nothing is working. Any suggestions will be very much appreciated.

We don't want to cry it out since she is scared and we don't want to spank her to get her to go to sleep. I don't see how either of them would help so please do not suggest them. Thanks

Answer 1

Your gonna have to ignore your child, i know it's hard but she won't get hurt by the monsters or from crying.She has to face her fears and go at it alone or she will never become independent. If she faces her fear award her with a treat or a fun day somewhere, but you need to let her do this on her own so she can learn that nothing will happen to her. I hope this helps Good Luck!

Answer 2

My silly brother started my kids on Monsters. We explained to our son's that Monsters are good - Cookie Monster, Elmo, They are monsters, and nice ones. They only bad monster is the one who lives under the fridge and spills milk.

Will she sleep with the light on??

Have you tried a radio, cd player, projector??

Have you tried letting her pick new bedding??

Does she have a special toy?

Do you have a night routine?

Have you tried jumping on the bed, and making it a bit of a game, then showing her it didn't move?

Have you tried getting to the bottom of why she has these fears??

Have you tried a 2-way, so she can call you up if she is scared?

I have 4 out of my 5 boys who have difficulties of a night, and I know it isn't fun. Try those things and see how she goes.

Answer 3

At a certain age all kids have night fears. It's a stage. The "monsters in my closet/afraid of the dark" stage. Leave the light completely on, the door open, and return to her if she calls - but keep it brief. A quick check, a kiss, and goodnight. She will learn quickly that saying the right thing will make you stay, so you need to teach her that you'll come if she needs you, but you aren't going to stay there for long periods of time or long discussions. That is for the daytime. At night there's nothing but sleeping.

It can sometimes help too if you give her some power over her fear. A 'princess magic wand' that will turn boogie men into night stars... I gave my son his own, real, flashlight. Worked great, told him it was a monster destroying lazer, he could aim the light at anything 'suspicious' and blast it away instantly.

I'd hear him blasting stuff for an hour, and then go in and turn off the flashlight once he was asleep.

;]

Answer 4

tell her your husband will beat up any "monsters" that are around.

Answer 5

Almost all kids of such a young age are afraid of new things. Getting rid of their toys, having a new babysitter, and even switching into a new bed. It's just different, and she's still trying to adjust to it. Have you considered it might not be the bed? Has anything changed in your home latley? Is there any reason she's not getting as much attention as she normally does? A new baby? Pet? Have one of you got a new job? Or just anything that you may be paying a lot of attention to? If so, these recent 'monsters' and fears, may be a cry for attention. She may just want you to spend more time with her. If none of these things are it, then maybe you should talk to her about it. Tell her that she's going to have to get use to her new bed, because she's becoming a big girl, so that's why you and her father have got her a big girl's bed.

I hope everthing works out for you guys, good luck!

Answer 6

I'm guessing you moved her from a toddler bed? I'm thinking she's just not ready. Mistakes are made if she's having that much trouble set both beds up in the room if you can and allow her the choice. I think you'll find that when she feels powerful to make a choice and you let her know there is nothing to fear but you understand she feels afraid she will soon warm to the idea and eventually make the choice to go to the "big" bed.children have very little control in there lives,literally using the bathroom,eating and sleeping are pritty much the only area they can to some extent control. allow her this.

Answer 7

develop a "monster spray" just put some water with food colouring or soemthing in a spray bottle with a fancy label and spray it before she goes to bed and tell her itll take away the mosters.