How do you grow without becoming conceited?

Question

Well, ok, I'm a kind person, I have a high IQ, and I'm kind of good looking. I realize that I'm not the smartest, wisest, best looking, or most generous person, but I've worked hard to cultivate these traits in myself, and I've had some success at it. Now I'm swaying dangerously between having a healthy realization of my strengths and being a conceited prick. I've tried self abasement but that's depressing.

My question is, how do I deflate my ego without painfully popping it?

Answer 1

You have made the first step to becoming a truly wise individual....

An intelligent person...often is tempted to think very highly of themselves....

A wise person....is an intelligent individual who understands that his vast knowledge is only a drop in the bucket.....and his ego reflects his humility.

You are one of the rare intelligent people...who become wise.

Answer 2

Well, sometimes, when people over analyze themselves in ways to make it sound like they're the best, it means they don't pay attention to what's around them. Do you pay attention to how your parents, friends, and family feel? Or what they've been up to lately? Also, a little community service goes a long way. You help someone that you don't know, but you do know that they need the help that you give them. After some of that, you don't think, hey, I did a good deed and now I feel good about myself, you think hey, I did a good deed, and now that family or person will have a better life. It lowers your ego to where you think of others more than yourself, because that is normally the problem of people who have big egos. I hope this helps! :)

Answer 3

This may help you.

Think of confidence and conceit as verbs.  Those that extrude confidence are leaders.  Those that extrude conceit are dictators.  

It's not what your are but how you act.

I was told that a Zen Master rejoiced when a flaw in themselves were pointed out because that showed them where they can improve themselves.  

You don't need self-abasement.  You just need to develop more leadership abilities to help you handle the inevitable occasion that you have the knowledge or skills to disagree with someone else.

Answer 4

I trust you will receive this, think about it and and grow without being offended. I think you misunderstand the idea of growing. Growing is to learn.

If you are really growing, you will not be conceited. Conceit is deception that covers insecurities.

Overconfidence is an exaggerated, self-important, pompous feeling that is easily defended. A confident person is not easily offended by others opinions because they know who they are. A confident person continues to learn because they are teachable.

Answer 5

The fact  that you would care enough to ask this question means that you can't be a conceited prick.  You care, and conceited pricks don't.  There is always a fine line.  Sometimes we make a jerk out of ourselves, but I doubt you are alone here.  It sounds to me like you will be just fine.

Answer 6

I must agree with the above answers... if ur good looking and u know it..ur a good person and u know it GREAT!!  But let everyone else around u notice that too...dont bring it to there attention.  That can be annoying and then people will be rude to u and call u a prick!!

Answer 7

in2one is correct - - - - "Awareness is the first step".  Meditation on a regular basis can help.  Difficult to do alone - find a group and work with them to increase your awareness, and the rest will follow.

Answer 8

If you want to grow as a person conceit is required.

If you want to grow as an individual with integrity

conceit is a hurdle.

Answer 9

Hahahaha!!! "I'm swaying dangerously between having a healthy realization of my strengths and being a conceited prick."

That's awesome.

I think you're just fine. Just try to be nice and you'll be fine. It's okay to be a conceited prick on the inside as long as you don't treat everyone around you like dog s h i t. :D

Answer 10

well the fact that your actually askingthe question is a good step in the right direction (and smart to try to avoide self abasement, taken to it's logical end you will be proud of your filth)  the most honest and effective way of "staying real" to circle up regurally with a small group of good frinds, and decompressing, with eachother, being open to correction but not quick to it,  we at compasschurch.com  just call it a connection group but theres plenty of names for it

Answer 11

Awareness is the first step and you are there....lol.  You can be as conceited as you would like, just be choosey when you decide to share that information with others.  People respond favorably to proof not self vocalization.  If you use 50 sentences while talking to someone, only start one sentence with "I"...that would be a good start....

Answer 12

Read this my dear friend!

http://innerself.ca/html/spirituality/ge...

Answer 13

You have to remain humble. Sure, all of us think that we are pretty good at one thing or another. But when you are humble, you will notice that other people will compliment you. That's when you know that your characteristics are shining. But if you flaunt them, people run away from that.

Answer 14

Have you ever tried God and his wisdom, it's sinful to have pride. Don't forget you had to work hard and God allowed success, humbleness is the key not self debasing.

Answer 15

remember where you came from

Answer 16

I created an alter ego for myself and whenever my nasty side would avail itself, I would just shift gears and become my alter ego.

I even used it as a game to see how fast I could shift into nice me, when I was being such a delightful "beech."

Answer 17

If you have an ego, non of your other traits will matter because no-one will want to be around you. RIGHT? RIGHT! Why don't you choose a famous actor/musician/athlete who is very handsome AND nice...but NOT a prick, and try to follow their lead on how they behave in public and with others. Sometimes it helps to have a role model!