How do you help someone that cuts??

Question

I recently found out my friend is a cutter, she wears arm warmers to keep them hidden. When I stayed at her house I found a razor and threw it away and now she uses whatever she can find knives, scissors it doesn't matter I can't make her stop. Her mom knows but yells at her more than trying to help. They have no insurance and she refuses to talk to anyone else. How can I help? She has very few friends and doesn't open up to anyone. I kind of found out by accident but they fact that she let me in means she trust me and wants help. What can I do? I don't want to lose her trust.

Answer 1

You have to make her trust you that you will be there for her when she needs someone to listen. When you have conversations with her, try mostly to turn the topic to be about her. So that she can open up with you.

We all know that self-harm is caused by stress and depressed. The needs to hurt herself to release what's inside her mind and heart. So to make her open with you, firstly, you have to be open to her. Show her that everyone got similar problems so that she can tell you hers.

I'm a self-harmer myself and I will need to make myself bleed to stop depressions. When I couldnt find my scissors, I use toothpick to stab my arm and sometimes, taking some overdose. Its not easy when you cant talk your problems to people but you can suggest her to have a councelling. It works for me x*x

Answer 2

Well i can say tht i cut myself 2 and some times we do it because maybe some one hurt us, we hav family problems,or maybe just skool issues......I know 4 me it was hard 2 stop cutting myself and it is still hard til this day 2 cut again and maybe your friend need i 2 help her through it and tell her tht she's not alone and tht u can help her......And u can pray 4 her and u can pray w/ her and tell God tht 2 help w/ this problem tht she has....And if she ask were did u get the information from, just tell her tht u got it form a friend........If u your your friend hav any more questions call me at [phone] and my name is Cameryn..........

Answer 3

It's a very difficult one. If you don't get an answer from a qualified mental health practitioner, you should look for a charity that specialises in mental health. I'm not sure what country you're in, but here in the UK there is a charity called SaneLine, which helps friends and families of sufferers. If you can't find any charities for those caring for people with mental illnesses, you should be able to get help from a standard charity.

Cutting, while serious and distressing is not the sort of thing people don't recover from. I'm not a qualified practitioner, but in every case that I've encountered so far, the person has been cutting to feel something, anything, and is generally a symptom of something deeper, although I once went out with a girl who just started spontaneously and then stopped just as mysteriously.

Good luck.

Answer 4

Try to talk her into seeing a Dr.

Answer 5

You have to show her that you're there for her.

Sit down and talk to her.

Knowing someone cares enough to sit down with you can be great.

You don't know what her "triggers" are- they could be loneliness. So knowing someone's there for her could be really helpful.

Offer to quit with her. Stop one of your bad habits- especially if there's something you do that she doesn't like- like drinking or smoking.

Offer to be her "sponsor" tell her to call you instead of cutting. Like what people do with alcholism.

Do as much research as you can so that you understand it, espescially accounts from other cutters online.

Friends can be really powerful in stopping, or even wanting to.

Seeing one of the people you love most in the world crying can be really powerful and make you want to stop.

One more thing, don't ask her what "that" on her arm is. It's pretty obvious. You can comment on it. But don't ask. It never stops being awkward.

Come up with a "code name" for it together. Make it funny. It makes it less awkward for her to bring it up with you.

Good Luck to both of you.

Answer 6

1st of all I believe it is better to lose your friend's trust than to lose your friend all together to suicide or anything like that. I have been where your friend has been and it's hard. Sometimes it becomes like an addiction, other times it just disguises the pain, but you can't make her stop only she can. Make sure NEVER to pull any of the "if you do it again I'll never speak to you" or "if you do it again I'll be mad" that only makes things worse and she'll do it anyway. I think you should sit down with her and calmly say to her " you're my friend, i care about you a lot, and i'm worried. i really wish that you would get some help" you can offer to go with her if that would make her feel better. in every state, pretty much, there should be counseling for free or a reduced cost, you may want to look into it. If she doesn't want to go, maybe you can make an appointment for yourself and ask her to come with you. I'm sure you're stressed and worried with everything that's going on so it couldn't hurt. Finally, there are many books, but one that I have found useful is.... Stopping The Pain: A workbook for teens who cut & self-injure......I'm sure you'll be able to find it online. Oh sorry, one more thing, most people who self-injure, when trying to stop, where a rubber band on their wrist and snap it when they get that urge to cut, this does cause some kind of pain, yet it can't cause any real damage. But if nothing else works, make sure that you let her know you're there for her and you want her to feel better. Best of luck to both you and your friend