How do you honestly feel when someone young enough to be your offspring or younger .........?

Question

calls you by your first name without invitation?

And is the trend increasing for people to do that?

Does it mean that I HAVE to like it?

Answer 1

Strange.

I have no problem at all with it.

It's my name. That is what it is for.

And I've never been one for formality in that department.

Answer 2

I don't really care. It works as well as "Hey you." And yes I think there is a trend toward using the familiar tense in speech. I don't think that this really matters however because after all its about communication which is unaffected by the use of familiar names or pronouns.

Answer 3

From reading some of the answers to this question it seems that  some of the younger people are saying that you have to earn respect in order to get it. But shouldn't it be the other way around. Shouldn't we give everyone respect unltil we find out  that they don't deserve it?  

Answer 4

Are you serious? Respect has to be earned! My professors even want us to call them on a first name basis; they aren't any better than us and you aren't eaither. Who the heck do you think you are?

Answer 5

I agree with you younger  people call me Mrs ?, only friends call me by my first name, and if younger people started to do it -they would be pulled up sharply.

Answer 6

When I was in management people would call me miss Dottie when I worked down south or they were from the south and I got use to it northerners or always called me by my first name but I didn't mind being called Miss Dottie I thought it showed respect and friendliness and I still felt it was nice best of both worlds but if they call me by my first name I had know problem with it, you know the old saying is Mrs. so and so is my mother-law call me by my first name, its cool either way.

Answer 7

It doesn't bother me. I'm a teacher so I'm called Mrs. all the time. I live in a small community and socialize with some of my students parents. Even during these times they call me Mrs. I think they feel weird by calling me by my first name as their parents do.

Answer 8

I bought some shoes the other day and used my credit card.  The 17 year-old behind the counter said, "Thank you, Judy. And have a nice day."  I think this is very inappropriate.  It is obvious that I'm old enough to be her grandmother, and don't understand why she felt free to address me by my first name.  

On another occasion, I was helping my daughter and her roommate find an apartment.  We were in a slick NYC real estate "loft" with a bunch of slick NYC real estate sharks who were all twenty-something.  My daughter and her friend introduced themselves using their first names.  I introduced myself as Mrs.******.  The realtor actually laughed and asked my first name. I replied that for now it was MRS.  

I'm becoming convinced that sales folks are being trained to use first names no matter how old the customers are.  Perhaps it's a misguided attempt to ingratiate themselves with their customers and make their customers feel like friends or family.  

It's not that I object to younger folks using my first name.  All of my daughter's friends and the neighborhood children use my first name.  I tell them to.  It's just that I feel that in a business situation, it's important to remain professional, and calling adults Mr. or Mrs. is part of being professional.

Answer 9

so what your saying is that everyone who is younger than you had to address you buy your last name and ask permision to call you your first name, who the h3ll do you think you are. i hate people like you, that think just because your old the younger generation owes you something. Well we dont, get over yourself

Answer 10

I loathe being referred to as Mrs.  I am a Ms in any case.  However, I work with really elderly people and I always ask if they mind me using their first name and, if they do, obviously, I don't use it.  I am 56 next week...

Answer 11

No Heathern, you don't have to like it and nor would I unless, it was invited.  To my mind people are far too forward these days and I also hate being called 'love' and 'darling' (by men and women) in the garage where I work.  Yes, I know they are being friendly but I don't like it and never will.

Answer 12

I'm "Aunt Donna" to half this town!  Native people teach their kids to call their really close friends aunt or uncle because they consider them their bro or sis!!!!  I hope this makes sense!  Non-Natives look at me with that look like, "okay what should I call her because the ndn kids call her aunt", so I usually break the ice. If I'm real close to his mom I say "Aunt Donna", if I don't know his parents I say, "Miss Donna"!!  I hope this makes sense. Now when I was a kid everyone was addressed appropriately~~~~~~~~sign of the times!!

Answer 13

I'm with you and I don't understand why anyone/some answers - would welcome disrespect.

I have 16 grand kids and all their friends address me as Mrs. ------------.

I'm 73 years old and I took upon my self. . . To set an example for my children to follow and I also acted in a respectful way for all who have known me.

I haven't ever had to demand respect.

I earned it and I greatly appreciate it when I see that parents have also set an example and taught their children manners.

Etiquette = Rules governing socially acceptable behavior.

DeeJay.

Answer 14

I'm 38 and my 16 year old daughter's friends call me by my first name. I would feel strage if they called me Mrs.

But it's the times that are changing.

With my parents' generation, it was improper.

I still feel strange calling their friends by their first names, but I feel like a child if I address then with Mrs. or Mr.!

Answer 15

It has been a long time since it has happened.  Of course I live in a state where it is just common practice to put Miss in front of a ladies first name no matter how old you are..... unless they are a close friend, but if you introduce them to your children it is always Miss.

Answer 16

I haven't really encountered it, when I thought about it just then I was surprised as the kids nowadays don't seem to have any respect - if you believe all what you read in the papers.

All my daughters friends have not called me by my name until invited to do so, I've even been called "Mrs Courtney's Mum" which I found sweet if not grammatically correct.

I answered a question similar to this the other day, someone had asked why kids should call their parents friend Aunt & Uncle and she even had argued with her friends about this and told her kids to use their first names!!!

No wonder manners are becoming a thing of the past!!!  Respect needs to be learnt and earned, if you stop teaching the kids the basics then they don't bother with the harder stuff too and that's when they start to become unmanageable and people often don't see their mistake until this point when it's too late!

See the answer below mine from My New Life Beins Now for proof of this!

Answer 17

I gave you a star because I did find this interesting.

I was taught growing up to use a title of respect to people who were senior to me. Reflecting back I realize that my grandchildren were corrected by our son and daughter if they used our first name though it really didn't bother me. I have a grandson turning 18 this week and I don't think he has ever called my wife or I by our first name although we are very close. To this day some of their friends call me papa. It would not bother me however if they called me by my name.

There used to be a small boy in the neighborhood that called me Keith and called my wife Miss Connie. If he came into our house to get a drink of water and saw any dirty dish he would wash the glass he had just used and any other glass he saw needed washing. "I can wash dishes Miss Connie" he would cheerfully say.

Now there are other small children in the neighborhood that always use our first names and smile and wave or even come up on the porch and give us hugs. Nothing disrespectful in that!

  I think that the use of titles is strictly a result of what the children were taught and grew up with and is no reflection of respect or lack of respect. Society is very diverse and we have to recognize the inner heart and not the outward appearance.

                                  Keith

                                          

Answer 18

I think you are right you should address someone Mr or Mrs for the first time and then let them correct you or offer their first name. Most people I speak to prefer to be referred to by their first name but there are some people who insist on being a Mr, Mrs or Ms. I get the impression that people who want to be referred to as a Mr or Mrs do it to keep the relationship impersonal not because they need to feel superior.

Answer 19

What's wrong with that?  It is your name, isn't it?

Add- Don't get me wrong I believe in Respect, not only for the older generation but respect for everyone including kids.  I have to agree with "My new life begins now" she said it bluntly but it is the truth!

Inorder to get respect you have to give respect.  So if you can call me by my first name(which is fine, and not a big deal) I can call you by your first name as well.  It is the same courtesy!

Answer 20

You are under the foolish assumption that us young people  have to respect you just because you are older. In this day in age you have to earn your respect. Doesn't matter if you are an elder or not. Don't flatter your self Mrs.heathernhoney . Lol

Answer 21

It would feel weird to me to have someone call me by my last name.  Everyone calls me by the shortened version of my name, except for business associates that I only occasionally see or hear from - they call me by my last name.  I have kids from tiny toddlers up to senior citizens all whom call me by my first name.  I see nothing wrong with it at all.

I guess it depends on the generation you grew up with, and how your family and friends treated everyone.

Answer 22

I work around some teenagers and young adults.  I would feel funny if they called me Mrs. so and so.  I think it depends on the situation.  I usually tell people to call me by their first name after asking their parents if it is okay with them.  A gentleman comes in where I work and I call him MR. so and so.  Some of my co-workers asked my why. I know almost all of the names of the restaurants customers.  I use the first names of most.  I told them this gentleman was a friend of my familiy and I couldn't use his first name.  Too ingrained. I am 56.

Answer 23

Depends. If these people are colleagues - equals except for age, then I would expect my peers to call me by my given name.

otherwise, they can call me Mrs. B.... thank you.

I'm a senior returning to college - all of my classmates - most of my teachers and my DEAN are much much younger than I am. I hardly expect them to call me Mrs. B.... - although many of them do (that's because their mothers raised them right.)

Answer 24

I am well past retirement age but I prefer for anyone to call me by my first name rather than 'mrs'. It seems much more friendly and makes me feel younger.   I think if you are uncomfortable with it then stick to Mrs.  I don't think it is  lack of respect unless you distinctly tell them not to do it. It does seem to be a thing of the 2000's.I don't mind moving with the times !

Answer 25

when a youngster uses my first name, I ask them if they have been invited to my house for coffee, they of course say no, I then tell them that they never will be and my name is Mrs. King

I noticed a couple of," you have to earn my respect "answers, and to them I say, NO you have to earn mine.  Kids today really are quite rude.  When I want someone to use my first name I will tell them.

Answer 26

I remember the first time a teen called me 'sir', it was about the same time as my first mid-life crisis.  If someone knows my name I prefer to be addressed by that.

Answer 27

Wow - you've got some heated responses here. Yes the trend is increasing. At 30 myself I believe it's really ( for the most part anyways ) due to some confusion. I know some people who prefer to be addressed properly / formerly as in Mr., Mrs., and I know others who prefer their first name. I'm not sure what to go with?? I suppose Mr. or Mrs, Ms. is usually a safe bet, but you will get some who say - don't call me by that -  you make me feel so old! My parents had me call most of their friends Aunt or Uncle so that eliminated that problem for me. I usually wait and see how someone introduces themselves to me and just take it from there :)

Answer 28

My children as i was were to taught to address as mr mrs or miss..it's up to the addressee to tell you what to call them.  i myself prefer my first name. I think it show signs of good manners in polite society and  you re right it's a lost art.  Also my mother would have frowned me to death if i walk in a house and said got anything to eat?  Manners definitely have changed.

Answer 29

it doesn't really bother me.

i've actually seen quite the opposite with my kids' friends...they tend to call me ms. ****** 'til i ask them to just call me by my first name.  some can't seem to break the habit of calling me ms.

Answer 30

I am able to express my dissatisfaction with a look. It seldom happens a second time.

I address others with respect and I expect the same.

Answer 31

Doesnt bother me. It seems to be the trend nowadays. Mind you my grandkids better not, then I would be off put. Im Nanni and its going to stay that way.

My kids friends call me by my name or Auntie and one of my friends expects even my 29 yr old to call her Auntie, and he does too!!! LOL My daughter respects that and uses Auntie or Mrs if they prefer that.

I dont mind either way. I m young at heart if not in body!!!