How do you know for sure if someone is a good or bad friend?

Question

I have this friend who well... frankly, she has a big mouth. She is very opinionated and sometimes she says rude things without thinking about how it might hurt the other person. I know a lot of people look down on that quality, but personally, I think it shows she's real and honest and always says it how it is. Some of my other friends tell me I should not be friends with her anymore, but she has said some hurtful things to me before too. Aside from that, I consider her a good friend. She's always there for me when I need somebody and I can always depend on her, but some of my other friends (from a different social circle) think she's not a good friends.

So is she a good friend or a bad friend?

I've known her for almost 12 years.

Answer 1

Its only u that can decide that for yourself if u need a right answer. The thing is there are plus and minus points to it, if she's always there for you thats good but a good friend will never intentionally hurt u.... and wel.. if she has opened her big mouth to people about your secrets she's not a good friend...

           As for her tellin rude thing about other people just try to advice her and see how it works out.... All i can say is only you can decide not ur other friends and not us

Answer 2

well, in my opinion, if she was a true friend, she wouldn't hurt you in anyway. either having a big mouth, or just saying hurtful things to you, it is still hurting you isn't it?

now, if she had something to say about your to you, she would say it in a "i know its hard, but i understand" kind of way. yeah its good to be honest, but you still have to remember the limits, somethings you have to keep to yourself, but others its okay to say. maybe she is saying too much, idk

but i truly think she isn't an all that good of a friend, you may think otherwise, but i do not.

good luck, and you can get answers here, but you have to figure out the one that fits your situation, only you know what to do or think because you are there, and we arnt

Answer 3

Well, first off, I know that you never listen to your friends when they tell you who is good with them and who they dislike. This just adds to the drama. If your friends have a problem with this girl, tell them to back off, that she is your friend, and they don't have anything to do with her. She doesn't have to be accepted into your circle by anyone else but you. If you still need help, tell them that they don't have to be friends with her if they don't want to, but you like this girl for who she is and you want to hang with her. As long as you know she is trust worthy, no one else's opinions matter.  

Answer 4

If you like her... she's a good friend, to you. Just don't force her on your other friends. They don't have to hang out with her just because you do. You should tell them that. Tell them if they can't accept that your friends with her then maybe they are being the bad friend!

Answer 5

are your other "friends" there for you when u need help?

just tell your blabbermouth friend that sometimes what she says hurts you sometimes ppl need a kick in the butt to straighten up lol

Answer 6

well i'm just like her i mean i always want to be honest with my friends i mean if i say something that they dint like they would tell me, so if u know ur friend for 12 years and u think shes a good loyal friend then She is a good friend..but if she isnt been a good friend just talk to her and tell her shes been cruel.  

Answer 7

  Everyone has their faults. I would not let other people tell me who I should be friends with. I'm not saying it is right that your friend can hurt peoples feelings but no one is perfect. I would never let go of a 12 year friendship. Maybe you could let her know that she can be hurtful when she says these things. I think she is a good friend that makes some bad choices.

Answer 8

I would have to meet her to know for sure. Being honest is good, but when it becomes hurtful, its not a very good quality. Theres a reason why you have people telling you that she isnt a very good friend. This is something you're gonna have to deide for yourself...cuz we dont know her like you do.*

Answer 9

Believe me you and only you know for sure!  Yes there are times when we get involved with a couple of scumbags and we over looked there bad qualities as them being honest and up front, but their true light shines through and we lose them for the better, but be your own judgement and just be honest with yourself !

Answer 10

There is a time and place to be opinionated and loud. A good friend looks out for you when she sees you in pain, makes thing happen on her end to make you feel better. Gives you the advice, not right there and then, but after she gives it thought of the "What if this was me?"

When they words become hurtful for others, especially if they are in need of a good embrace, brutal honesty is not always good in every situation. Express her the concerns you might have, regarding her rude behavior towards other and yourself. I give her points for being bold enough and not be scared to hurt people's feelings by being so blunt, but again.... There is a place and time for everything.

Would I consider being a good friend? Dependable, yes.. Good friend... maybe not so much.