How do you know if a male friend is a true friend or if he wants something?

Question

Me and my husband have a mutual friend who is so sometimey. Both of us agree on this. Sometimes he can be talking to us candidly one day, offering his advice on this and that, but then ignore us the next day. I can tell that he is nicer to me than he is to my husband though - which I chalked up to a personality preference. Is this a bad sign? Should we just leave him and his mood swings alone?

Answer 1

Yes, leave him alone.  Better to be safe than sorry.

Answer 2

He could just be busy. I have friends that I do not talk to every day, of if I do, its short and sweet because of what is going on with me. Not to be sounding mean here, but do you need him to hold your hand everyday? I mean come on, he does have a life that does not revolve around you two specifically. take it for what it is worth and go from there.

Answer 3

And "friend"  that ignores you isnt a true friend.  May not be after anything, but at the same time, dont give him any reason to think there is any possablity if he is.  Definitly would say you and him should not get togehter without your husband.  And wouldnt hold too much in his friendship.  No problem letting the good parts of it continue as long as no bad is coming from it, but wouldnt get too invested in the relationship with him

Answer 4

I would leave him alone.. My Gf had a guy friend who she swears is just a friend. As trivial as this may sound it made her realize.. He had text messaged her one day about wanting to have dinner and hang out. And when I texted him back and told him that is was not cool to ask my GF to do that he changed his tune very fast and with a reply said he just wanted it to be lunch and that all of a sudden he has a gf too now and it meant nothing. Sounded very deffensive to me and it sort of showed that his intentions were bad. She chose not to talk to him anymore. It seems your situation is a bit different thought. Your guy might be bipolar lol. Or he might be trying to manipulate his was to you, and when he gets shut down or something doesn't go as planned he acts standoffish. I would leave him and is drama at the curb.

Answer 5

Leave him alone.

Answer 6

Some people are just moody, I would just ignore the mood swings, (I'm a Cancer and I'm moody)! I wouldn't hang out with him all the time, but if you enjoy his company and his advice then I wouldn't drop him completely either. If you're concerned that he may make a pass at you, just make sure you're always with your husband when you have your friend over and if he is single, maybe you could introduce him to someone you know? He may be nicer to you because maybe something about your personality makes it easier for him to be around you. Some couples are like that, in general you like them both, but one can be more relatable then the other.