How do you know you're wiping your bum correctly?

Question

Nobody ever tells you how to wipe you bum! Personally I think it should be taught in s*x Ed, on a dummy r****m.

I tend to use a linear motion, but I was just wondering if anybody has another method? Getting bored of my method.

A demonstration would be very much appreciated. If your answer is good enough I'll tell you where i live and you can come and show me (all expenses payed).

Answer 1

You have a bum who lives with you?  And you need to wipe him off sometimes?

I don't understand...

THROW THE BUM OUT!

Answer 2

wipe it with chili powder on the paper that is less boring

Answer 3

Once I discovered the fold technique I never turned back to the crumble.  So, I fold the toilet paper several layers thick and I wipe from front to back.  I often finish with wet wipes for that oh so clean feeling. :o)

Answer 4

You are obviously full of c**p, so I'm sure you do not even NEED to worry about wiping ur bum.......

Answer 5

That's just plain nasty. Effectively you are throwing out the idea into the cyber realm that you would like to watch someone wipe their crack.

EDIT: I thought it was the best and most original wiping technique that claimed the honour of a personal demonstration. My method involves origami swans so I would need prep time, and I did not think it would be of interest to an enthusiast.