How do you prevent yourself from falling victim to adoption fraud?

Question

How do you prevent yourself from falling victim to adoption fraud?

Answer 1

Go through a well know church adoption agency for your religion or go through one that is well established in the state you live in.

Going out of hte country is not cheaper as some believe and many get caught up in scams.  There a hundred's of thousands of children right here in the United States in need of loving adopted parents.   Everyone wants a baby, but no one wants the child who can talk already.  

If it sounds too good to be true---it is!

A lot of people wanting to adopt, go for private adoptions thinking that's the easy way.   It's not easier, you steel have to prove you have a stable income.  You still have to go through a home study, a background check.  If they don't do these things, they are not legit.   When a woman gives up her child, in many states she has up to six months to say she wants them back and you can't do one thing about it.  So realise that is always a risk, especially with teen moms.   Just becuase a teen promises you her child, don't run out and buy everything for the baby.  WHY?  Because the rate is high for teens mom's to say before the baby is born.  I'll give my child up. Yet soon as they hold the baby they can't do it.  So you've waited and hoped for months, beleiving you are getting her baby and at the last minute it all falls through and any money you put into the care for her, for her unborn baby is lost.  You can't get it back, it's the risk you take.  

If you are using an attorney who does private adoptions, spend the money to look into any complaints with the state bar on that person.  Do an internet search to see if this attorney has had any scams attacked to his or her name and or office of practice.  

Adoption is a risky thing, both for you and the baby, child you adopt.   I was adopted and it was h**l; children don't get enough say in being adopted.  Do not adopt a child, even a baby, thinking it will be perfect, will love you, will have no problems.   You think of an adoption like giving birth, you accept what you get, you love that child with all your heart even if they have problems, even if they end up with health issues, mental or otherwise that no one warned you about.  If you can't really do that, don't adopt.    No more children need to be adopted into negative homes, it happens way too much as it is.

Take your time, make sure adoption is a good choice for you, for the child.  Get with a well establised agency with a good record.   State adoption agencies are the best as far as for avoiding a scam; but if you go through a state adoption agency.  Demand to know the good and bad about the family rom wihc the child came.  Many agencies still think it's wise not to reveal histories of drugs by the parents, the fact a baby was born addicted and the parents health histories too often are not accurate and complete.  So tell them you want to know everything, good, bad, everthing.  

If you are by chance LDS, the LDS Church adoption agency is reliable, but they like the state often in the past did not fully disclose the child's past, pregnancy problems, drugs or alcohol problems by the parents, mental health issues within the parents backgrounds, physical health issues, etc.   Demand full and complete disclosure.  

As an adopted child; all adopted children I've ever taked to want to know the biological family history.  No manner how good or bad their adopted families have been, they want to know.  Never hie the fact they are adopted, as I promise you, someone always tells them they are and it always seems to be at a time when the child can't deal with it.  Tell them the story of their adoption from day one.  Then it's just part of who they are, not big deal.  NEVER, EVER talk down about their biological family.   Even if you were told htey were horrible people, you just say something like.  Your parents had many problems and becuase they loved you, they wanted you to have more then they could give to you.   You tell a child they were given up because their parents didn't want them or didn't love them and you'll have a teen ager one day on your hands with tons of emotional problems.  

Get pictures, kids needs these pictures of their biological family.  Make up a special book, that you share with them regularly about their biological family.   Kids who've had this, don't grow up with the issues those who don't do.   If you can, get hte biological parents to write a letter to your child, a loving letter about why they chose to let you adopted their child.   Then you read it to them just before the time you adopted them each year.  

You hide the adoption, lie about their birth family or talk down about that family, you hurt the child.   Make it positive, a good thing to be adopted.  

Get as much information as you can.   My one cousin who was also adopted ended up with cancer, if they had known at hte time that cancer was common in her biological family, it would have helped them in her treatment.   Ask about their social life, their spiritual life, their economic situations. Their parents and siblings.  What talents run in the family.  If you can, get the adoption agency to agree to let you speach with them or write them a letter so you can ask all kinds of questions.  Tape it, so you can go back and then type up all you talked about and learned.   The more you know the more you'll have to offer to the child aboutt their biological family.  A child won't choose them over you, just because they know about the biological family, if you make it part of their life from day one and you raise them with love, discipline and honor.

Good luck!

Answer 2

Do your homework.  Interview the agency (or attorney) you'll be using.  Ask for references & call and ask hard questions (how long was the process, was there anything you were dissatisfied with, if you adopted again would you use them, etc.).  Find an adoption forum online & seek out people who've used the agency and seek out their opinions.  The agency will only use references that they know will give them a good references (good business)...but you might find folks online who've had less than positive experiences.  Pick their brains.

Check the Better Business Bureau (you can do this online) and see if they have any complaints against them & if/how they were resolved.

Answer 3

get a lawyer

Answer 4

Use proper legal adoption agency's only.

Answer 5

Hire a good attornedy in advance, follow ALL interstate child compact guidelines, and hold your breath until the judge issues the decree.

Answer 6

It depends on what you are protecting.

If you are the father of the child that is intended to be placed for adoption, you need to immediately seek your own lawyer right this moment.  Srsly.  Otherwise you can and will be marginalized as quickly as the law allows.

If you are the mother of the child that is intended to be placed for adoption, you need to immediately seek your own lawyer that is independent of the agency or adoption facilitator/lawyer.  You should also make sure that which ever agency or lawyer you decide upon is highly ethical.

If you are the parents waiting for a child to placed for adoption, you need to act in the most ethical way possible.  You need to find an agency that has ethical practices.  You need to realize that even if you are matched with a pregnant mother, that child is still her child until relinquishment is finalized by the law.  You are dealing with people who are in a crisis and are easily coerced, manipulated and marginalized.  

Safeguarding the rights and well being of birthparents in the adoption process. This link discusses the the changes that those that facilitate the adoption process should make in order to honor that ethical obligation. It is in everyone's best interest if you find an agency or facilitator that meets the qualities in this pdf.

http://www.adoptioninstitute.org/publica...

Also a checklist for what to look for in an ethical agency.

http://www.openadoption.org/bbetzen/chec...

Best of luck to you.

Answer 7

By not posting or responding to posts or ads online or in newspapers.

By leaving this very complicated, highly risky, difficult and  multi-level work to the adoption professionals.  The most ethical ones absorb most of your risk.

Answer 8

Go through a well-known agency with a good reputation. Also, make sure to have a lawyer go over all paperwork and be present at any initial meetings. Also, make sure you know exactly how long the birth parents have to change their minds after the baby's born. Also, take it from someone who watched a baby being ripped from its' adoptive parents' arms, make sure that the birth mother is honest about who the father of the child is and get him to sign away his rights, as well. Do NOT accept a baby, no matter how tempting it may be, without getting a father to sign off on it, too. If the birth father didn't know about the baby and finds out, he can come back and get the baby.

Answer 9

By involving a reputable agency that specializes in adoption, you are protecting yourself as best as possible from adoption fraud.  That is not to say that all agencies are fail-proof.  Some bio-parents still do change their minds although it doesn't happen all the time.  Many adoptive parents choose to adopt internationally to protect themselves from this occurring.  Also, adopting an older child, rather than an infant may protect adoptive parents a bit more from a situation of bio-parents changing their mind.

Answer 10

Protect yourself at all times- if you are offered by someone to have your child adopted -You then insist that they pay for YOUR LEGAL expenses - you chose your lawyer who is looking out for your benefit and the benefit of your child! No exchange of money or child shoul doccur until the adoption is finalized!

Answer 11

go to a proper adoption agency

Answer 12

use an agency and/or an attorney and go with your gut feeling about someone ... if something seems to be too good to be true it usually is

Answer 13

Please use a reputable agency.  Don't deal directly with the family of the child you are adopting.  A lawyer who specializes in adoptions would be your best bet.  You can also look into international adoptions.

Answer 14

A proper adoption agency that has references you can check.