How do you punish your 5 years old?

Question

I have a 5 year old that won't pick up his toys and won't listen to us. If we ask him to do some he yells and screams at us. No I don't want to leave me alone hits bites and kicks. Him being like this scares me because I'm7 weeks pregnant. How do I get him to stop? Any ideas would be great. Time outs taking things away don't seem to work.

Answer 1

i like the first answer.Tell him that the way he is acting is not ok and you need his help to care for the new baby.

sorry not a big help

Answer 2

nanny 911

Answer 3

take the toys...put them in a bag...put the bag by the dumpster outside...show him... and he has to earn one back at a time. it can be very dangerous to have a kid kicking you when your pregnant. you should explain to him what can happen. and as for picking up his toys, make it a game. Give him a treat or something for cleaning his room, or pretend to time him. Maek it fun for him. but dont let him run you over.

Good luck

Answer 4

You have a few issues there. Try working on one thing at a time.

Perhaps the first week work on the yelling. Tell your child that if he talks nicely he will be listened to, but if he yells there will be a consequence. Then follow through on the consequence if necessary. You could even reward talking nicely with some stickers. Try to catch him talking nicely and reward it very quickly.

The next week concentrate on the "not listening" thing. Only ever work on one thing at a time at this age group and make sure you explain to the child what you are going to do.

Otherwise it will be a shock to him. Explain, then warn, then start giving out consequences, only try real hard to be giving out more rewards than consequences, if possible.

Answer 5

First of all does he have a good routine ie bedtime ect ect

Give him some responsibility ie tidying his toys away each day will result in a star 5 stars get a prize.

Dont demand jobs done ask him like while mummy makes dinner can you tidy your toys then we can have some us time.

As for the hitting time out is the only way one hit and straight to time out, explain when he hits you that mummy is not your happy friend he will soon be sorry.

Answer 6

I actually believe that talking works most of the time. But when punishment is called for I spank--I have no faith in time outs, etc. So, my child is probably punished less than most kids, but spanked more.

The only way this works (as with any punishment) is to be consistent--if the punishment is deserved do it every single time. It also should be more than a couple of dull thuds--the old traditional bare bottom spanking is a thousand times more effective.

Answer 7

pick up his toys put them in a bag that he has to earn to get back

after that put him in time out one {1 } min. a age  ie 3yrs old 3 min  4 yrs old 4 min etc etc

does not start intell he STOPS crying

it works if you work it and it wont if you dont

good luck

ps i have a 27 yr old boy/man

a 21 yr old gilr/young woman

and 17 yr old BRAT

i mean girl

good luck

Answer 8

If he yells or screams at you, tell him that he is not allowed to yell at you in a stern voice and stand your ground. If he hits, bites, and kicks you, either you or your husband take him into his room and close him in there until the tantrum is over. If it still doesn't work, give him a spanking on his rear so he knows you mean business. Not enough to hurt, just enough to surprise him.

Answer 9

Take away everything! That means no tv no toys no books no phone no nothing. Let him have nothing for one week until he starts to listen. If this does not work then talk to him and tell him to be nice and dont kick because that hurts the baby. I hope this helped.

-Tara

Answer 10

Sounds like he wants your attention and he has learned that by screaming and yelling and hitting.... he can get your attention so he does it.  He has learned to seek out negative attention. For instance, when he screams you tell him to stop and concentrate on him - he has your attention.  When he hits you or bites you yell at him and attempt to put him on time out - he has your attention because you have to stop what your doing to focus on him.

So tell him what behavior you dont want in a calm but authoritative voice when he hits you tell him "I do not like it when you hit me it hurts me and if you choose to do it again you will sit on time out for 5 minutes" (1 minute per his age)  And if he chooses to hit you again follow through with the time out.  Take him over to what ever spot you choose and get down on his level and tell him why he is sitting their and for how long.  Ex.."Joey you are sitting here for because you chose to hit me after I warned you not to, you will sit in this spot for 5 minutes"  and then walk away and do not say anything else to him until his time is up.  If he gets up simply put him back w/out talking to him and start the clock over.  Be patient because he will test you just simply keep an eye on him but do not speak.  It will get better when he knows you are serious.  If you give up things are just going to get worse but you are the parent and you need to take charge.  It might feel really bad but he will learn how to respect you he wants you to be in charge.  When his 5 minutes are up go over to him bend down and get on his level and explain to him why he is here again.  This is the time I usually use to work through the situation.  Talk with him about what he could do better the next time and get an apology and a hug.  Yes, just like super nanny.  I'm a day care teacher and have been using this before I knew who she was.

  

What about positive reinforcement.  He is asking for your attention really so make it for positive things. Try rewarding him for good behavior such as cleaning up toys pushing in chairs.  (If you notice him try to talk to you about a problem after you guys have worked it out say to him "I liked how you talked about what was bothering you instead of yelling at me or hitting me"  Start by recognizing and praising good behavior no matter how small.  He'll see you praising him and want the positive attention.  Give him a lot of compliments during the day and make him feel special.  You can use stickes along with praise for things like cleaning up his room, helping with dishes, etc...  Maybe after 10 stickers he can get a toy or do something special with mom or dad.   And spend time with him focusing mostly on the good and things will get better.

Also, keep in mind that he may feel he's not getting attention with the new baby.  He may notice you paying more attention to getting this ready for the new baby and spending less time with him and may feel like you don't notice him  (that might be why he is acting up)  Keep him involved as much as a 5 year old can be and make sure to spend time with him.  Tell him whats going on and whats going to happen and reassure him that your still there for him.  Is he an only child, if so he's probably used to having you all to himself and having all the attention.  Give him time to adjust.

Answer 11

Due to this kind of behavior, I personally think you should start telling and warning him about groundings and tell him if he does that kind of behavior again, he would be grounded.Or you should make his time-outs longer.  

            

                         Hope I was some-kind of help!

Answer 12

Time out...

Spanking is just wrong!

Answer 13

ground him no toys, tv, treats,

Answer 14

I've never had to "punish" my children because from the very beginning we set rules.   I discipline my children but I don't punish them.  They know what is expected of them to earn their privliges and if they don't behave they get no privliges.  I have never had to take away toys or television, computer or video games because they are not given until they are earned.  I don't accentuate the negative behavior I accentuate and reward the positive.  In order for ANY form of discipline to work it HAS to be consistent.  If you give up and move on to something NO form of discipline is ever going to work.  This is a 5 year old CHILD not an adult and he is going to behave like a 5 year old child.  As for picking up his toys...limit his playing area to ONE room in your home only and don't fret over the toys not being picked up..is it going to matter 20 years from now that his toys weren't picked up?

Answer 15

It could be just a stage.

I would give him a little lucky box, or something. My sister has a 5 year old son who was always throwing tantrums. So she made a box with sparkly things and stickers- something that would attract a younger kid's eye- and put tiny wrapped gifts inside. Whenever her son listened to her and Daddy she would let him pick out a gift. Gradually, she stopped giving the kid gifts.

& it worked.

:)

Good luck xx

Answer 16

Drastic times call for drastic measures. If he doesn't want to pick up his things and take care of them strip his entire room of nothing but his bed and 1 lovey to sleep with.  Tell him you will issue him his clothing as needed for each day and that he has to earn all his toys and things back by showing he can help when asked and without the tantrums and attitude.  Lock all his stuff away in a closet or garage or somewhere only you know where it is, even the trunk of your car.

He can earn it back doing and acting how he is expected to, but only 1 toy at a time until he learns. If he starts his attitude again at any point, start over. I guarantee that when he sees his stuff going into trash bags or boxes and his room stripped of everything he will straighten up fast to get it all back.

Also make no TV, no sugar snacks/treats and no friends allowed until he cooperates as part of it.

Answer 17

jjj

Answer 18

Take away everything in his room except for his bed, bedding, clothes, dresser. From there he earns things back daily. And if he is bad the day after he gets something back then you take back what you just gave him the day before. There is no yelling, no bribing, no warnings. Punish the first time everytime.

Answer 19

He needs to get a time out

Answer 20

if he dont pick up his toys take them away in front of him start putting them in bags and hide them away in the garage or something   dont turn the TV on when hes awake or around  find some things he can do to vent he sounds angry   is this sudden behavior it could be jealousy  however  ask him if he wasn't to do kick boxing or karate  it could teach him some discipline  and respect fr his property

Answer 21

explain how hitting can ghurt the baby inside you first, tell him everyone has to be careful just like you all were when he was in there

tell him acting up will result in loss of his toys, one by one.  If it continius instead of getting them back they will be donated to other kids who dont have toys

loss of privilages like tv, outside time, or dessert.