How do you respond when???

Question

Someone says something that you find inappropriate or hurts your feelings or bothers you in some way and you call them on it. Instead of them apologizing or at least saying 'oh, I didn't mean to offend you'.... instead they make a comment that deflects it onto YOU for having a problem, such as 'chill out' or 'why can't you take a joke?' or 'why are you so sensitive' or 'you are making a mountain out of a molehill'?

How do you respond when someone offends you. You call them on it. And instead of taking responsibility for what they said, or at least acknowledging your feelings, they blame you.

How do you respond?

I am just curious as to how others deal with this. I see this ALOT lately, where people deflect and put the person down, when that person is only standing up for their feelings and their own beliefs.

Answer 1

I know how something makes me feel and if it hurts my feelings I don't think it was a joke or me being sensitive, I think it hurt my feelings for the way you said it. If you didn't mean to hurt my feelings then I suggest you try saying it in a way that is not hurtful.

Answer 2

I know how you feel also.

It happened to me once.

One night when I used to live in Yorkville section of Manhattan, and walking to C-Town few blocks away, reading a book.

As I was reading a book, I sneezed when oncoming stranger say to me, "Shut up, ******." and I said, "I not niger." but she continue to hurt my feeling. I was upset and I not very smart, so I told my parent.

Answer 3

usually if someone says "relax, it's a joke" I'll just say "Oh really? because I didn't find it that funny". or "calm down" I reply "no, I will not calm down" haha usually because I probably should calm down

Answer 4

If you are truly being overly sensitive, then you are genetically predisposed to also be overly sensitive when you respond to someone who responds to your oversensiveness.

In otherwords, it's a continual loop of Normal people behaving in a normal and expected manner, only to be attacked by overly sensitive people who not only cry when they are told something, they cry again when the other person doesn't say sorry, and they cry again when the other person deflects the blame wehre it belongs.

Soon, the overly sensitive person has no where to go and thinks the world hates him/her.

Answer 5

I'd say something to the effect:

My chilling out isn't the issue, you saying something offensive is.

Answer 6

Alot of times people do say things like "geez take a joke" etc mainly because you DID call them out - now they feel stupid - yknow? I honestly would say something like "that's real nice to say" or "you know that was out of line" etc...something along those lines will tell them flat out that you are insulted by what they said...