How do you share your love ?

Question

Hello, my name is Alissa. I am a 22 year old Army wife and a mommy to a tremendously intelligent and sweet baby girl named Ava. My husband is an Infantry Staff Sergeant and paratrooper in the United States Army.

I was two months pregnant with baby Ava when my husband deployed to Iraq. He (my husband) missed her birth and didn't return home to meet Ava until she was eight months old.

I delivered her alone with no friends or family present.

Alex and I just discovered that we are pregnant with baby number two. I am due one month AFTER he is scheduled to deploy again. This means that I most likely will deliver our second child alone and Alex will not get to meet child # two until s/he is over one year old.

I am so nervous about being a mommy to two. I look at Ava and I don't see how I could possibly love another child as much as I love her. She is my best friend. i know that I will love my second child but sometimes I feel sad for Ava because she will have to share my love with another little baby.

Is it normal to feel this way? Why do I feel like this? Does this mean that I won't love my second child as much as I love Ava? Do you think this feeling will go away?

Answer 1

I had the same fears. And the moment you see and hold you baby it just happens. You instantly love them as much as your first. Don't worry you can and will love them both the same. And don't look at it as you are taking love away from Ava. You are giving her someone else that she can love and that will love her. Congrats!! and Good Luck

Answer 2

we have the same experience! i have a 12 year old daughter,and i just given birth last 3 months.they have 12 year gap.i felt that way too that i might have a favoritism.scared that im much in love with my 12 year old daughter and scared that i cant handle them both.its normal to feel that way.but it will pass.when you gave birth to your second child believe me it will pass.just include the sister and share her the wonderful feeling to have a new angel in your house.congrats in your new one!

Answer 3

Calm down. Every parent goes through this with the news of expecting number 2. You wont love Ava less. You will find the capacity you have to love grows and makes room for both. You will probably not believe this and question it until the moment you hold the new baby in your arms. But my predictions will come true. Good luck to and your husband. And wishes for a speedy and healthy return of him and a healthy baby.

Answer 4

You will love your second child just as much as your first. As soon as he/she comes out--just like with Ava--you'll see your baby and will fall instantly in love. It just happens.