How do you stop being afraid of someone?

Question

When you are being verbally abused/ bullied and someone is trying to make you feel bad about yourself for their own sense of control, what do you do?

I'm finding it hard not to feel afraid of someone, I guess because I feel continually attacked by them, and because the very fact that this someone in my life is capable of this kind of frightening behaviour, and seems to absolutely not have any reaction of remorse or ANYTHING to the pain she is causing me.

I just feel frightened that anyone can be this way.

Of course when you get scared of a bully, you are giving them their reward.

How do you not be afraid/ show your fear when dealing with someone like this? How do I protect myself?

Thanks

Answer 1

next time she attacks you just smile at her and it'll make you more confident and drive her insane ;)

Answer 2

Tell yourself that you KNOW you're stronger. It's terrible and painful being bullied like that..I know ><

Just look at her as though she's a complete idiot and say "sorry, I don't speak idiot." and walk away.

That or tell someone else about it. Never go near her alone, make sure you're with friends.

If she tries insult you, you could say "oh, out of the mental asylum early are you?"

or point to the street and say "the hobo settlement is over there, did you get lost?"

Remember that she is never going to hurt you physically so you have nothing to be afraid of..If she ever does, hit her back will all the force you can manage. Take classes in self defense or something and it will make you feel much more confident in your own abilities.

Good luck =)

Answer 3

I totally get what you mean. Do you also just freeze and can never think of anything to say or do?

Is there a way you can just not live with her? I know thats probably not an option, but a thought. Living with other ppl can ruin relationships sometimes.

If not, you must at all times remain calm.If she feels that you are trying too hard, she might also attack you there. Remain calm and be as diplomatic as possible. If she is insulting you, you can respond like "i'm sorry you feel that way." That way you are not giving into anything and not making it so she can fight with you more.

Also, you need to keep in mind that you are not supposed to be treated that way by anyone let alone a relative. Well, thats why you say you are so sad. But even in your facial expressions, you probably show that you are hurt?

Maybe try to think of it this way: she must be miserable inside and trying to make you as miserable as she is.

hope that helps

Answer 4

Bullies have usually been bullied, they often suffer with low self esteem and by bullying another person they feel empowered and in control. Basically its a vampiric draining upon the energy and vitality of another individual in order to sustain themselves. You overcome a bully by standing up to them, no-one has power over you unless you allow it. Body language plays a significant factor in how we attract bullies and how we deflect them, if you can, try your best to ignore the bully's threats. Pretend you don't hear them and walk away quickly to a place of safety. Bullies want a big reaction to their teasing and meanness. Acting as if you don't notice and don't care is like giving no reaction at all, and this just might stop a bully's behavior.