Question:

How do you stop thinking about the death of your child? 29 and left a 9 year old son behind.?

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Son sick in hospital. Real bad for 3 weeks, dr. wasn't helping him, tried to release him several times. I fired the Dr. got a new one . He did everything right. Was getting better. The morning before he was to get out, he passed away under suspious circumstances. Police and dectives everywhere when I got there. Wouldn't let me see him for 3 hours, and when I did they said if I tried to touch him I would be detained due to it was a crime scene. After 6 months still don't know what happened that nite. Hospital dropped a 93,000.00 $ bill. Cant stop blaming myself for not being there with him and sending him to that hospital. You know the what if, why, should have, if I could have. Its like a cancer. It would of been easier If he would of died from being sick or a car wreak, at least I would know what happened.

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  1. Not sure what the circumstances were but it would be difficult to leave my son behind. Hospitals these days expect you to stay with your child in a hospital at all times or hire someone to sit with them if you are unable to. Sorry the about the loss. but you must learn from the experience, consider any other members of your family and the loss they are experiencing, stop the blame - this will hurt you in the long run. Only time will lesson the grieving you are going through. Bless you in the difficult times - may your higher power carry you at this time of loss.


  2. You never do stop thinking about it.  You need to grieve.  You can't blame yourself either.  You do need to try and find ways to move on, but not forget.  Keep him in your heart always.  Losing a child must be one of the hardest things in the world.  My dear friend lost her 21 month old son to a backyard accident last October and when I was discussing how much she grieves still with my mother, my mom said, "My mother died 14 years ago and I still cry myself to sleep at night missing her."

    You should seek counseling, if you haven't had it, to help ease your guilt, but grieving is necessary.  Let yourself grieve as long as you need to.

  3. you need a lawyer, ASAP

  4. I could never forget my son, especially if he died in that manner...why would you leave him alone in the hospital? I would sue them and try to find out what happened to him. I am sorry for your loss.

  5. In my life I handle troubled times by turning my heart to the Lord.  If you are inclined in that direction I suggest that you seek immediate comfort there.  I'd also suggest looking into a support group for grieving or searching out some books on dealing with loss.  I think it might also help if you had some answers.  I would work daily to put the pieces in place.  Stay on top of the investigators, call daily if you need to.  If you haven't, contact a lawyer to work on things as well.  Perhaps if you put your energies into solving the mystery your heart will be able to find peace.  Also, despite what others have posted, you are in no way responsible for his death.  It is an unrealistic burden to expect any parent to be at a child's bedside alone 24 hours a day.  While it's unfortunate that someone wasn't there hospitals should be safe and as a society we should have confidence in their ability to keep and care for those we love.  Best wishes in the future...I hope things get better for you soon.

  6. Wow, my heart aches for you.  Take comfort in knowing that he's with God now. But that doesn't mean stop trying to find closure. You didn't request an autopsy? I know it sounds harsh, but it is sometimes necessary.  I would talk to a nurse secretly.  Just because the cops said it's a crimescene that doesn't mean they are investigating. Hospitals are real good at damage control. And cops have tons of cold cases. They become cold because someone put them down.

    Have you thought about talking to a P.I?

  7. My daughter was 27 when she died, almost the same type of senerio, she was going to be released that day to go home to her family, but never made it out of the room.   It's been three years, and me and my wife still cry for her, but you have to move on, she left us with two beautiful grandchildren.  It's still hurts, but you have to move on.

  8. I am so sorry for your loss.  I can't even begin to imagine what you are going through especially under the circumstances.  I would suggest talking to a counselor.  You did everything you could to improve the situation for your son.  You weren't just sitting around letting those doctors do whatever, you were active in his care.  Sometimes bad things happen even when we do everything in our power to keep them from happening.  Have you tried contacting a lawyer to press to find out more info of what happened that night?  Again though my heart hurts for you and I will pray for you that you find peace.

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