How does homophobia affect you in your daily life?

Question

Obviously if your straight you probably wouldn't be able to answer this (so please keep the smart a** remarks to yourself).

Anyways, g*y, bisexual, and transgendered men and women, does homophobia affect you in your daily life? If so, how? Do you get treated differently in customer service (retail, restauraunts, public places in general) because of your percieved mannerisms, dress style, appearance, voice (in other words, anything that would "give away" your sexual orientation concerning stereotypes)? How do people at your workplace treat and percieve you (or how have they)?

Has anybody ever refused your service or treated you rudely (in customer service) because of your sexual orientation? Or have people ignored you at parties, family gatherings, work, church, or just get-togethers in general because of your sexual orientation (or percieved)?

How has it affected your self-esteem and how you view yourself? Do you find yourself blaming who you are or just more angry at the monster that is called homophobia (or biphobia/transphobia)? Mature answers only please. Thank you for sharing = )

Answer 1

with all my friends. my lady friends i treat with utmost respect as i havve for there partners or spouses also. i tell the jerks that they aint in my bedroom so keep there noses out, dont judge me on who i do

but judge me on how i treat you. i get along with straight guys cause i tell em "hey we got something in common lol" sorry.

i dont resent myself cause i love myself, my lady friends love me and my husband that im madly in love with loves me also.

str8 boys are just soooooo insecure. the ones that are secure but outta respect tell you we can be friends just dont grab the family jewels! so with each friendship there is respect.

my husband is the best and no i dont cheat on him, i am faithful and all my friends know that. we both respect our vows.

you take care and email me if you would like.

im a butch female with a feminine male, perfect fit.

Answer 2

I'm sorry to hear about the way people behave or treat you :( it's truly disappointing to still hear about these things in the 21st century. I used to dress very tom-boyish when i was a kid and i got snickered at by other kids and have had rude remarks said (i didnt understand why back then). But it was because they thought i was a L*****n. I don't dress like that anymore so it doesn't happen anymore, but you can tell in the way i talk (i think my voice) - but otherwise strangers wouldn't be able to tell i'm bisexual.

Answer 3

My favorite was when my partner and I were dancing together in connecticut at his company christmas party.  We became invisible, and everyone made great pains not to stare.  Even our friends became nervous and tried to join in (group-dancing).  That was odd, but great fun.  I love making people question their own boundaries and forcing them to acknowledge the world is not flat.

Answer 4

Great Question!  I am a server and have had someone refuse to let me wait on them just because I'm g*y.  I've also had people yell **** out of cars driving by, just because I'm simply dressed not "straight".  I've even had people gasp and run away from me at the club for making out with a guy.  Ha ha it was funny.  

People tend to constantly point out the fact that I'm so g*y and this and that yada yada, I don't mind it too much but it can get on my nerves.  Yes I will agree with you, people do think that g*y people have germs and if they get too close than they'll catch it and uh-oh.  

But I also have some straight guy friends that are awesome and so accepting.  People are so nice sometimes where as others are so small minded and cruel. D:

Answer 5

I'm a FTM(female to male) transsexual.  I'm only 5 feet tall, with a semi tenor range voice that doesn't always pass.  I have a goatee, so I'm a little bit of an odd looking character to most people.  Most people assume I'm a g*y man.  

But...the fact that I'm trans has caused numerous issues as far as college.  I've ran into issues with college housing and roommate matching..in fact they ended up putting me in an apartment by myself because they have a same s*x policy in regards to roommates. I've had issues with admissions and my transcripts not having the same name, even though I'm the same person.  

  I've had issues with jobs, due to background checks and the name not matching again.  I was denied a job once because my background check came back with my old name, but my same social security number, so they thought I was a "fraud risk".  

  I did work on campus to get gender identity and expression added to our campus anti-discrimination policy and asked students to sign a petition to have it put to a vote on campus, and students would tell me to my face (not knowing they were talking to a trans person because I pass that well) that those people are "freaks", "confused", "sick", ect.

  I've been called an "it" which I think is the worst insult ever.  I was arrested once and had inmates putting horns on their heads and "mooing" at me (in reference to "bull d**e").  In high school students tried to run over me in the parking lot after theatre practice.  

   Even though I identify as a guy, I can't join a fraternity, or a men's sports team on campus, without running into a lot of walls, I already know.

   It has affected my self esteem before.  I became severely depressed and actually ended up in a psychiatric hospital for over 2 weeks for suicidal ideation. But now? I say f**k them.  I'm done with sh*t taking.  If you don't like the way I live my life, you don't have to look at me.  And as far as I'm concerned, unless you're my doctor or I'm sleeping with you, what's in my pants is MY business.  

Answer 6

To be honest, I'm not really affected by that much homophobia. Even when I walk past kids in the street holding hands with my girlfriend we don't get any funny/nasty comments.

What I always get is men walking past saying things like "Wanna try me?" or "Hot L*****n ;-)". It infuriates me because I'm holding hands with my girlfriend so I'm clearly NOT wanting to try them and they have called me a L*****n so must know I'd never be interested! The only homophobic remark I've got was actually this weekend when I went to a g*y pride festival and a woman said to her friends "SHE isn't a L*****n, she can't be." It wasn't exactly homophobic but it was uncalled for.

Other than that though, people have been accepting. You do get some older people looking down at you but most people either don't stare or just smile. I suppose I'm lucky not to have faced the homophobia yourself and others have.