How hard is it for my husband to adopt my son?

Question

My son is 12 and i have been with my husband since he was 3, my son does not know that he is not his real dad and his real dad has never seen him, how hard would it be for my husband to adopt him?

Answer 1

Well it's not hard but you really need to think about it b4 you do it. Biological Father has to give up his rights first. Is he going to do that? Your son really needs to know the truth about his "real" father. I have 2 children from a previous marriage & they know who their "real" father is & I STUPIDLY let the man I was married to at the time adopt them. Later, we got divorced. Just remember that no good dead goes unpunished. I truly regret the day that I let him adopt my kids.

Answer 2

If you are collecting child support from the bio dad(which is pretty crummy if you are and not letting him see his son) then you need to have the courts let him sign away his rights and tell him he doesn't have to pay another dime to you.

Answer 3

most of the time you have to get your childs biological fauther to relase his parntal rights, then get an attorney to file with the courts for adoption

Answer 4

not sure

Answer 5

As long as his bio father has given up all legal rights then go to a lawyer to start the adoption process. Good luck :)

Answer 6

You need to stop lying to your son NOW. Tell him the truth of who his father is. You are s******g with your son's identity by not telling him.

Further, your son is too young to consent to an adoption, a legal erasure of his father and his entire paternal family.

Do not let your husband adopt your son.

Answer 7

Have the real fathers rights terminated based on abandonment. Then go for it. But if you didn't tell the real father about him, you might be in for a serious battle. If you have a legit reason go for it. It will just increase the bond between your son and husband. GOOD LUCK

Answer 8

not hard at all... when my daughter was 3 my ex husband adopted my daughter..and all we did was call around at lawyers offices and asked if i could get a copy of all the pappers we needed for the adopting and i found one and he charged like 10 cents per copy and we filled them out our self and took them to the court house and did everything our selfs..it might of coast like 40.00 total... due to haveing to file the paper work at the court house... good luck.. just call around and u can get copies and do it your self..

Answer 9

*sigh*

I understand you and your husband's reasonings for wanting to go through with the adoption and to continue with the status quo.

But please, just try to put yourself in your son's shoes for just once.  If your father wasn't your biological father, wouldn't you want to know?  It doesn't mean your husband can't and won't continue to be Dad to your son.  It won't change the fact that he loves him as a father and they have that father/son bond.

But he DOES deserve to know the truth, and to find out about his origins IF he so chooses to do so...either now or sometime in the future.  It's a matter of respect for him as a person.  Wouldn't you want your rights to be respected in the same way?

Just tell him.  Give him his dignity and let him decide what to do with the information.  Nothing will change in your family, but your son will at least feel respected and will have the dignity to not be lied to any more.

I doubt anyone would want to have something like this kept from them, child or not, it's not fair.  Try to see it from his point of view.

Good luck.

Answer 10

If it hasn't been done already the bio fathers rights have to be terminated( depending on what state you live in this will have to be done). Then your husband can start the adoption process.

Answer 11

Tell your son the truth and let him decide.  If he wants to know his birth father, help him find him.  No matter what you do always be honest. You need to inform the natural father, at this point of time i bet he would sign over his rights. Then your child will be free to be adopted by your husband.

Answer 12

Since your husband is the only father he's ever known - he IS your son's REAL father.  However, he is NOT your son's biological father.  What does his birth certificate say?  Sooner or later he will see his birth certificate and wonder what's up.

If your son's biological father is not named on the birth certificate then (unless there's something different in your state) he has no parental rights to terminate.  Also - in some states, the child (ages vary) has to consent to the adoption.

Tell him the truth now.  It's early enough that you can tell him you were waiting for him to be old enough to understand.  How to tell him will depend a lot on your relationship to him, his father's relationship to him, his level of maturity (does he trust you? is he acting out?).

Good luck!