How is it possible to have a family this way?

Question

So, me and the father of my two daughters split up in January. He has a new girlfriend whom is currently pregnant with his third child. And I fully respect this. I don't have any problem with her, although, from what i hear she's not the nicest person in the world. I was raised in a very close knit family, and I believe it's crucial for him to be in the girls' lives. But his new g/f is always objective to him being around me. I can understand that to a certain extent, but I've sat down and talked to her about how I'm accepting of their relationship and although it may be hard for me, If he's happy I'm happy for him. But still, she throws a sh*t fit every time he comes to see the girls. I'm someone that believes there is a way to have a family without the parents of the children being together. I want a friendship with him. I don't want it to be mommy one day daddy the next. I don't think it's wrong for me to want to take the girls to do things together....WITH him. I've tried my best to befriend his girlfriend....but she always seems to brush my gestures off, and turns around and tells my ex I'm "harassing" her. It's ridiculous. I understand she's a huge part of his life now, but I don't think that gives her the right to push my kids out of it.....Any advice?

Answer 1

well at 1st I thought u meant his girlfriend just didnt want him around u when he picked up the kids... but I understand where she is coming from when she doesnt want you all to hang out as a family... if you & him split up, well then the whole family did. you just have to deal with that & you cant do things together. he is probably even exaggerating when he tells you things about her. gus make girls seem even crazier then they are. but you need to get over him & the "family" spending quality time. you both made a decision to split up, then thats what happens.

Answer 2

thats crazy if your boyfriend had a mind of his own he would tell her to back the f*uc* off and hes seeing his girls,they were there a long time before this new baby and NO FAULT to the new baby but it is going to have to know its sisters. you are a fantastic mum and very strong to be willing to do what your doing as not many would with a kind of (step mom) all you can do is just do what your doing, she is obviously jelous and totally insecure, dont ever stop the bond with your kids and their dad over a paranoid woman. but you have to get tough and tell her the BULLSH*T IS OVER,your a mammy and shes one to be, time to grow up. tell her you understand why she would be so overprotective of him but you are no threat as you yourself have moved on. In all fairness darling im a mum of 2 im 24 and still with my b/f of 7 years and if i was not with my partner now i wouldnt take anything his new partner said, as long as my kids were ok and i was ok then she can go to h**l!! just hope the baby comes out ok and doesnt have a sycho of a mother! best of luck,your an AMAZING PERSON AND A GREAT MOTHER AND I WISH I HAD A FRIEND LIKE YOU!!xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx oh and dissregard what miccccc said cause YES you do need to spend family time together and to teach your 2 girls that its ok to have family time together as a family so they dont grow up alienated to the fact when families split the mummy and daddy never speak again,thats just sick and alot of horrible sick things can be said and never rectified if both parents arent present for the most of the childs up bringing! you both went in to this together so end it together with love and commpassion,so end it with love as it begun in a friendship way and commpassion in an adult wayxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx