How is this poem????????

Question

my boyfriend and i have been together two years im 17 hes 20... im wondering if this poem is ok for the start anyway... when we first met each other we use to stay out side till 3 in the morning getting to know each other even in the rain

Gushing wind, brutal rain.

Cold but happy

Getting to know each other.

Each night she lay in bed,

Perished and shivering

But with a smile on her face.

Each word he said

Lingering in her head.

Each smile he gave

Making her weak

For she

Was falling for him.

Answer 1

thats really good

Answer 2

a little wordy. u need a few more lines but try replacing words like "and" with commas

Answer 3

with a little work it could be very good, like drop the 'but' last line verse 1.

post more

Answer 4

I can sense the love but something is missing !!

Answer 5

its very informative

Answer 6

i like it, tip:

"Each word he said

Lingering in her head"

instead of lingering try lingered

Answer 7

Yes the love is easy to sense but theres a little ingredient that you forgot because well it does need just a bit more descriptive becuase you dont want it too descriptive.... how about this

Gushing wind, brutal rain

cold but happy

Healing and pain each night she lay in bed

erished and shivering there for me but with a smile on her face (thats what i think my remix lolllll) u can use it i aint tellin u 2 change it or nufin :D