my action adventure, i made this a week ago, but i not sure if it cool or not, can you tell me?
Powerful superhero in the world
Once there is a baby name Jesse and his parent who are scientist went to the lab, the parent were so busy they forgot about Jesse. The mother hit a strange liquid , it fell and pour all over Jesse. Jesse starting to grow wings and claws. Blood splatter all over the lab, Jesse was out of control. Year later, Jesse still staying in the lab until a strange man walk in the lab and saw blood and limbs all over the place. Then saw Jesse crawling to the door. The man takes care of Jesse and he knew about the power. He teaches Jesse all about powers and stuff. Then he ready to battle when he was 7 year old. He killed some monster. When he was 10 year old he start fighting a mean boy name Hunter. Then when Jesse falls to the floor as Hunter about to finish him off, the strange man ran between Hunter and Jesse as Hunter stab the strange man. Hunter freak outs and ran away. The strange man said his last words. “ I…..I sorry, I….. know you……. Will be-be-be…. A powerful superhero….. you have 1 weakness…. Your weakness is watching your girlfriends die…….†As he passed away. 8 years later, Jesse still thinking about the strange man as he flying to Tokyo, few days later, he met a girl, Risa Fukuyama, they fell in love with each other, but they never admit it. A week later they met a group of friends: Naru Narusegawa, Shinobu Maehara, Motoko Aoyama, Kaolla Su, Mitsune "Kitsune" Konno, Keitaro Urashima, Haruka Urashima (aunt of Keitaro), Noriyasu Seta, Sarah McDougal, Kanako Urashima (sister of Keitaro), Amalla Su (sister of Koalla), Lamba Lu (brother of Amalla and Koalla), and finally Mei Narusegawa (older sister of Keitaro). Jesse and Risa live with them, then few weeks later, Jesse have to go back to Arizona. The rest want to go with them, Jesse figure he have a mansion for a lot of people, like a hotel. So he decide that he will take all the people to his mansion. The rest of them cheer. Few days later, they arrive to Arizona, Risa finally admit that she in love with Jesse, Jesse admit it too. They went on a date in Arizona. The next day Amalla and Lamba have to go to Tokyo cause their parent died, Koalla want to stay in Arizona, so they left without Koalla, Jesse sense trouble, Risa gone missing. Jesse flew all over the city, then Jesse sense it in the bowling alley. Jesse burst through the window and saw Risa tied to the wood that going to the wood cutter, Jesse flew to her, but Hunter throw a knife at him, the knife hit Jesse wing, he screams and fall. Jesse put his hand up in the air and chanted “ ay ba te ti maaaa†and a light burst out of his hand and hit hunter, which cause Hunter to fly to the wall, he scream in pain. Jesse chant weakly “ta ye na tig haaaaaaaa†then the wood cutter stop, Risa was halfway to her doom.
so.... how was it?
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