How long did it take for you to get comfortable caring for your newborn?

Question

Obviously, this applies to your first child.

I've had experience working with small children for years, but never "newborns." I work in the infant room at my church daycare every other sunday for 2 hours, but most parents don't feel comfortable leaving their little-little ones, and most children are at least 5 months.

On the occasion that we get some 3 month olds, they sleep the whole time.

I'm afraid I'm going to feel very awkward holding my baby, bathing my baby, nursing my baby. Just because it's stuff that I've never done before.

How long did it take you to get comfortable with the baby?

And how long did it take for daddy to get comfortable with the baby?

Answer 1

it does take a little getting used to all the new changes and the new little family addition. it took me about a month before i felt confident. once i learned all her personality quirks it was smooth sailing. i remember before she was born i always said..I'm doing this and that method and all that went out the window. i read so many methodology books on how to raise a baby and they give good ideas but every child is different and those methods don't always apply!  

Answer 2

I didn't plan my pregnancy and I was absolutely petrified that I wouldn't know what to do as I was on my own and had absolutely no experience with babies, had never even held one! But for me it just happened completely naturally, and I've heard a lot of people say the same. I did think I wouldn't know how to hold him but as soon as he was put in my arms it's just a natural thing and I knew. And I remember, in the hospital I thought I was going to be the first mother in the world who wouldn't figure out how to change a nappy or an outfit or give a bath - but the midwives in the hospital are so great at showing you the practicalities and doing it for you when you can't get the hang of it - and by the time I came home (only a day later) I felt like a pro at all that stuff, and after a week if anybody else was holding him or doing anything I was there nitpicking telling them they were doing it all wrong! You just have to trust that this maternal practical side to you is built in somewhere in your brain and kicks in as soon as you have the baby - that's the best way I can describe it! Don't worry hun, and best of luck :-)

Answer 3

Hi I know exactly how you feel before I had my little one about three months ago now I was teffifed id never even seen a brand new baby never mind held one!!!

Its amazing though ull be fine as soon as they put him/her in your arms youll know what to do!! And before long youll be doing things with one hand and have baby in other!!

coongrats and good luck

Answer 4

What I'm about to say may sound like an insult to some -- but it isn't meant to be one...just an observation: We have evolved from cavemen. Common sense and intuition will serve you well in caring for your baby. Given you have this vast experience in dealing with little ones, you should have no problems and will take to it like a duck takes to water.

Your husband may hold back -- but I highly discourage this. As a father, I tried to do as much as I could. The one thing that helped was: When my wife returned to work, I took 6 weeks off and cared for our daughter. By being able to do this, I was able to care for our daughter without my wife hawking over my shoulder. We each have a way of doing things. Neither was 'more correct', just that she didn't like how I did things.

Why am I sharing this with you? Because you have more experience in dealing with little ones, you could easily get into the "I'm the expert" trap and alienate your husband -- which based on your question you don't want to do.

Best of luck to all of you. This is both an exciting and stressful time in your life. Try to make the most of it. I wish you and your husband the best!

Answer 5

surprisingly we took to parenthood right away. Before I had them I was always afraid to hold newborns, thinking I was going to drop them or break them.

My DD was a little over 4lb and I never got nervous hold her.

You'd be surprised how motherhood kicks in right away

Answer 6

as soon as my first son was born, the maternal instinct kicked in. i felt so comfotable with everything about having a baby. it was like i was meant to be a mother. i have 3 now, the newest is 3 months. good luck, im sure you will do great!

Answer 7

Sweetheart....once you get to hold that baby..all your fears will go out the window...well not out the window..you'll still have them, but they don't matter. Everyone has to go through the learning curve. Just make sure you have tons of family and friends to support you along the way. I think about a week into having our son home I started feeling like a pro...I've been a stay at home/work from home mommy for 11 months now....I'm still learning..each new milestone brings new fears and anxieties, but I just remind myself that females have done this for years and will do it for years after I am long gone ;) They all survived and so will we! best of luck. As far as daddy goes...it's the same learning curve...the same milestone changes....my husband felt really comfortable about a week after having my son (holding him)..he didn't  bathe our son on his own until our son was 7 months old...but now he does it like it's nothing..daddy's biggest fear now is our son falling down..while learning to walk....you, baby, and daddy will all be fine...just take it easy and remind yourself that you'll always be learning!

Answer 8

i felt the same way and i have experience with little-little babies, 3 weeks and older. but the moment my daughter came out i knew everything would be fine, and it was. dad actually took the baby from the doctor, after he cut the cord, the nurse had to take her from him so they could weigh, measure and clean her up.  

Answer 9

As soon as the drugs wore off from the epidural and I was lucid enough to care for him... so basically from the start.

He's your baby there's no "watchful eye" over your shoulder and you can't be worried about "doing it right". It comes naturally 'cause you're the one that decides what's "right".



And it took a year and a half before my hub was comfortable with our son, but he's got a whole other slew of issues, so he's irrelevant.

Answer 10

I'm sure it's different for everybody.  My husband acted like a pro by day 3, whereas I was nervous about everything until the baby was maybe 6 weeks.  I was so afraid he would cry uncontrollably in public, and I wouldn't be able to comfort him, and everyone would think I was a bad mom.  Please remember that you are his mom--you've carried him for nine months, and even if you really don't "know" each other at first, he looks to you for everything, and you know him better than anybody else.  When people give you advice, just smile and say thanks, and then do what your heart tells you to.