How long do most people see their therapist?

Question

how long do most people see their therapist?

how many times a month/week?

do you get attached?

what is like?

Answer 1

depends on what's going on with you.

usually once a week unless you've got some huge issues and after a while they do every other week, once a month, etc.  

i saw one for a long time and it didn't seem to do anything.  meds helped me more than she did.  i never got attached but i really liked her. i think that if you got really attached as the person above did, then you might want to consider another one... the best thing about a shrink is that you don't have to be really into them, you just need to feel that htey are being effective in making you feel better.

most shrinks just sit around asking you questions about why you're there and trying to dig deeper into what's bothered you enough to see them in the first place.

i had one really awesome shrink that was a cognitive therapist. instead of asking about my childhood, she helped me recognize when i felt anxious/depressed and gave me exercises to help along with homework (ie go to a buddhist temple once a week for 2 months and see if it helps).  I would highly recommend cognitive therapists over "counselors" or the like.

Answer 2

Each person and situation is unique and different.  Different people have different issues and different goals for therapy.  Some come a few times are feel 'fixed'.  Some have adjustment or life change issues and need to deal with an issue.  Many insurance companies believe that an individual only needs 10-14 therapy sessions.  Generally, a therapist doesn't believe they can even start at the core of things until 4 or more sessions in.  Some have serious and chronic mental illnesses that bounce them in and out of the hospital and patient programs and rely very much on their therapist being their main supporter.  These people might be in therapy for their whole life.

Depending on the issues determines the level of attachment.  Well, and each individuals need to attach.  With someone who has childhood abandonment and abuse issues, attachment issues are going to end up addressed (or unaddressed but there) in therapy.  Attachment is not bad if handled correctly.  It is very much part of the process.  People who have a good amount of outside support and grew up in supportive environments, that might not be as necessary.  It depends.

I personally deal with a lot and my therapeutic treatment team is my main support system.  I have PTSD, DID, GAD, anorexia and depression.  I see my main therapist twice a week for an hour each time.  I have been seeing her for 3 or 4 years.  Her care and attention and her choice not to give up on me when I gave up on myself saved my life.  I am very much attached to her.  It's different than other therapists I have worked with before--one relationship was ruined because she couldn't handle my attachment issues.  She wasn't an experienced therapist and didn't have the necessary emotional boundaries.  

With my therapist now, I work very very hard to learn to achieve on my own.  I'm not afraid I will do anything or say anything to make her reject me.  I am not afraid that she will get tired of me or just wont want to see me again after a vacation.  I know she cares about me, I also know she has her own life (a GOOD thing).  I know she can handle her own feelings and issues and she can take what I have to tell her (an issue with former therapist who was uncomfortable with what I had to say).  

She will give me little Christmas gifts and transitional items and they mean a lot to me.  I give her cool looking rocks and homemade muffins.  At the end of a therapy session I get a hug.  Mostly, I've learned that feeling 'attached' the right way is about feeling safe and accepted and cared for just as I am.  She says her goal is to hold the hope for my future that I am unable to hold at this time and to continually offer me more and more of it to hold on my own.  And I have done that!

Unfortunately, with the therapeutic relationship, that is not how it always is.  Transference and Counter-transference can make things nasty if the therapist doesn't know how to handle attachment.  Sometimes the client feels that their life depends on the therapist and they become terrified that they will leave/die/not want them.  That was my experience in the past.  Now I know that is not ok though it tends to be an issue needing processed.  

If my therapist died today, I would be horribly sad and upset and feel at loss (I know I have others on the team that will step in and help though--I wont be stranded).  I also know that I would be able to continue on--my life doesn't end with her.  Which is a good thing.  Because she allowed herself to care and a healthy attachment to be formed I was able to achieve for me.