How long should an engagement last??

Question

i'm only 16 and my 17 year old boyfriend asked me to marry him and i said yes.... we're planning on telling my grandparents in 2 years.... but is that too soon to tell them?? and how long do you think that the engagement should last.... i have 3 years left in school if that helps.....

Answer 1

You probably shouldn't even be thinking about marriage until you are at least in the financial position to pay for the wedding yourselves. Thats what I think.

Answer 2

your soo young. But i wont say anything negative about age because sometimes love can last forever even if your 16 or 40. Just make sure your both serious on this. For some reason when boys turn 18 they change their minds. Happen to my ex who i was with almost 4 years and my friends bf who broke up with her when he turned 18.  so just make sure and becareful. Tell ur grandparents whenever you feel its right. don't put a year on it. do it when you feel you should. its ur life not theirs.

Answer 3

you should wait till your done with schoo that should be good enough. :]

Answer 4

It would be best if you both completed school before getting married. It takes a whole lot to support a family in today's economy and a good education is a must!  

Answer 5

Finish schooling first. Get settled with a steady career. Both of you.

Answer 6

you should get married when you feel you are ready. if your grandparents know how serious your relationship with you boyfriend is, then once you finish school seems like a good time to tell them.

but you should definitely wait to get married until you are out of school first.  

Answer 7

normally an engagement is as long as it takes to plan the wedding. the original definition of 'engagement' meant that you were planning the wedding. nowadays people are getting engaged younger and younger and having long engagements. but the intended length of 'engagement' is just to be however long it takes to plan the wedding, normally between 9 months to 1 year.

Answer 8

Long enough for you guys to be sure that you're both financially stable (stable income, college graduate, manageable but preferably zero debt) and able to live on your own as a couple.  

Answer 9

It should last as long as you want it to. There is no set time limit on that sort of thing. I know people who were engaged 7 years before ever getting married. So really that's up to the couple.  

Your 16 so I'd hold off on telling your grandparents or anyone really, because your young and in a couple of years you guys may not feel the same about each other. If you're 20 and still together and wanna get married then congrats and then you should tell others.

Answer 10

Really a promise ring would be appropriate for your age. I was 18 when I got my promise ring from my now fiancé. It was a  1/4 solitaire diamond ring but a decorative band or anything would work as a promise ring. My best friend (who is 19) has a beautiful promise ring that is white gold with two hearts on it. Plus a promise ring will show that you are committed and intend on an engagement, so your family (&his) can get used to the idea of you two being on a permanent basis.  Also you can get him a band as his promise ring as well. I knew a couple my senior yr in HS that done that. And as a bonus a promise ring is cheaper then an engagement ring. Mine was a few hundred compared to my engagement ring which was a few thousand. However I'm assuming that since you're not telling your grandparents for a while that you don't have an engagement ring... so get a promise ring and share that with the world.

If you tell people that you are engaged at 16 you might not be welcomed very well. Trust me I was engaged at 18 (he was 23), he proposed a few months after I got my Promise ring, and people didn't take kindly to that, and you're thinking that you shouldn't care what other people think. That is very true but it will hurt your feelings just the same, believe me, I cried many times when the people I cared about were less then kind about it. Truthfully I didn't care what those people thought about my relationship, it just hurt that they still couldn't be happy for me, or at least not say stupid rude things to my face.

But to answer your original question an engagement can last as long as a couple wants it to last. I'll be engaged 2 and a half years when i walk the aisle. However on the flip side my parents were engaged 6wks before they tied the knot. So you see it's completely up to the people involved. By the way we told our family and friends the night we got engaged.

Good Luck!!

Answer 11

I'll save the lectures for other people and just answer your question...I met my husband a month before I turned 18 and we knew we wanted to get married about a month after my 18th birthday.  So I suppose in 2 years you will be the same age I was when I decided to get married.  Perhaps if the age thing causes tension in your family, just put it off a bit.  I could have gotten married at 18, but that would have ruined my family relationships, so my husband and I waited 2 years which put me at 20 when we got married.  That seemed to work well for us.  I'd say, wait until you're an adult before you tell your parents or grandparents.  Then wait another year or two before getting married.  You're just so young that getting married as soon as possible could ruin other relationships for you.