How mad would you/your wife be?

Question

I am currently deployed to the Middle East and did not make a mention of our anniversary to my wife in email or a phone call. The excuses’ can go on for ever but the fact is I have access to email and phones. The only thing I did forget is the time zone.

Now my question, should my wife forgive me or do I get the full brunt of a woman scorned?

Answer 1

Did she mention it to you? It is a two way street. Forgetting something like that in a war zone is completely understandable I would think.  

Answer 2

She should forgive you as long as you make it up to her  

Answer 3

Of course she should be mad. Yes, you are doing an honorable job for our country, but it is just as difficult for the families left behind - especially if you have any children. She gets to sit at home waiting and wondering how you are doing, and if you are thinking of her. She can't go out drinking and carousing because people will judge her. You on the other hand, can drink and spend time with other women around who are also lonely and away from their families with no worry that the word is going to get back to her. If you were so busy missing her, wouldn't you have been counting down the days to your anniversary. You had the one opportunity to give her the easiest cheapest gift ever- a call/email and you blew it. I suggest you make it up that day of each month until your next anniversary, she might appreciate it and forgive you,  and you won't forget the day again.

Answer 4

Im sure shes hurt, not so much mad.

If I were her Id let it go....

the fact that your asking this shows how much you do care,

Answer 5

I would be hurt but, you can definitely make it up to her. You do have the best excuse around. It's understandable that you'd be stressed (making you forget) and the totally different environment doesn't remind you of daily life at home. Tell her you miss her so much EVERYDAY, you lost track of that special day. This does, of course, mean that you can never, ever miss another anniversary!

She'll forgive you if you work at it.

Answer 6

I would hope that she would understand your situation...that you probably have a lot of other important things on your mind. When you come home you should probably do something special to make it up to her, but honestly, she should understand...

Answer 7

I am married to a soldier and most of us wives can understand the troubles of a deployment. The question is how much time have you had to adjust on this tour, did you forget your special day or did you simply confuse it in your messed up time zones? I think she'll understand. Just tell her your sorry you didn't mention anything but you didn't forget, then remind her of a special time you sharred together. If you make the conversation special she may even forget that you actually forgot LOL

Answer 8

Oh, I'm sure she'll be fine.

Explain everything, about the time zones, how there's CLEARLY alot on your mind at the moment, you love her very much.

It will be alright.

:)

Answer 9

She'll forgive you after sometime. My husband sleep in the same bed and forgot about our anniversary last year. I was mad at first but I forgive him.

Answer 10

Just tell her you got confused with the time thing.

My husband forgot our anniversary and we sleep in the same bed every night.  (No time zone problem)

Answer 11

well of course she has the right to be mad but just hear her out for the time being and eventually she'll get over it.  make sure next year is done better than any other year or you'll hear it 10x as bad.

also a simple apology (no excuses - we hate those) is the best thing you could do. also send flowers or a handwritten card.  

Answer 12

I do forgive you baby, But you did hurt my feelings.

I waited all day by the phone for you to call, and you never did.

I love you very much, and can't wait to see you.

Just to let you know though..I get anything i want next year.

Be safe soldier, and don't you dare forget my birthday.

XOXOXO

tuffgirl, jmc and india have the right idea and yes kim, I did mention it to him, I sent an e-mail.

Answer 13

I think you get a free pass on this one.  The normal routines of a marriage relationship can't all go on normally while you are half a world away in a war zone.  You need not just her forgiveness, you deserve her understanding and moral support.

take care of yourself and surprise her someday with an out of the blue card, gift, call, whatever.   Good wishes

Answer 14

If it were me I would get a bit irritated. But guys forget S**t like that. Oh well. Just wish her a Happy Anniversery ASAP!