How many of you have never ever made a terrible parenting decision??

Question

Honest truth please.

Answer 1

No parent would ever admit to a really big mistake but at least there are some honest parents who have admitted to some minor ones here today. I have 3 children who I gave a little more freedom than they should have had for their own safety. I and them were lucky as no would be abductor was around at the time. The McCanns were not so lucky.

Answer 2

Yes,  I must have. Maybe not terrible ,but certainly not the best decision on occasions.

For instance, when my children were younger they would go off and play with their friends,  They would go away from my house and play at their friends homes.  Sometimes they would go and play in nearby fields, but I always knew were to find them and never let them play for hours on end with out checking.  Was that a bad parenting decision??  They were always OK, except maybe for the odd cut, bruise, we even once had a broken arm!!  I don't think so because as I say they were always OK. But there will always be horrific exceptions

One summer, just as the school holidays started.  one of my younger son's school friends went off to play with his older brother and some bigger boys.  They decided to go in the grounds of a disused cotton mill.  Then it got more adventurous than it should have, some of them climbed up the fire escape.

Alan, my son's friend and the littlest of the group, reached the very top.  The platform there was rotten, Alan went through and fell to his death.

At the time it was truly horrifying for all who knew this happy, cheerful, little lad.  I have never forgotten that and have a tear in my eye as I type this story.    I can still see his parents as afterwards they would go around the neighbourhood with their other children.  A more sad sight I have never seen.  

But,........  There for the grace of God.



We all protect our children from dangers and dangerous people but now and again someone somewhere comes unstuck.  Not always through  bad parenting, but from bad people, bad situations and yes, sometimes from bad, poorly thought out decisions.

Answer 3

yep at the ages of 5 and 2 i dangled my kids out of the top floor bedroom window and asked them if they wanted to die, they were of course screaming the street down. i did it because i had seen toys flying past the patio doors because they had opened the bedroom window and i did not want them to fall out of the window. they could get into the windowsill because it was to the side of the bed, the bed would not fit anywhere else in the room and fire regulations prevented me from putting a lock on the window as it was a fire escape route, so what was i to do, let them jump or frighten the c**p out of them. when i  look back now it makes me go all funny to think if i had lost my grip i could have killed both my kids and i wouldn't dream of doing it again but this just one of many mistakes that have been and will be made. that's life

Answer 4

ME, hubby and I are childfree!!

Answer 5

Living in Cornwall, I do a bit of caravan cleaning on a Saturday, for a few extra bob. Amazingly, people are STILL using the babylistening services, leaving ther little kids inside a caravan whilst they go out to the clubhouse. A listener comes around every half hour, and lets the parents know if the children are awake. They think this is acceptable, because they,(unlike the McCanns) pay for the service that actually checks the kids at less frequent intervals than the McCanns did.

I usually find these are the very parents that slag off the McCanns.

In answer to your question. I once lived in Portugal, and my Daughter and her family came over for a visit.

       It was my Daughters Birthday, and our Silver wedding anniversary, and we went out to a posh hotel for a meal, leaving the children with a resort babysitter.(not a listener)  We paid the girl well for her services. I knew the girl, who was a local Portugese law student.

    During the evening, my daughter lost a contact lens, and decided to pop back to the apartment for a new pair (just 300 yards away) When my daughter entered the apartment,there was no sign of the babysitter, and the kids had been left alone.

     My Daughter waited for over 15 minutes for the babysitter to return, and was pretty angry that she had left the children alone, and she gave the excuse that she didn't like the English snacks we had left for her, so she popped to the shops for some Portugese snacks.

     Our evening was ruined, as we couldn't trust this girl with the kid's again, and the next day, we reported the girl to the babysitting service we hired her from. We were disgusted that they took absolutely NO action, and the girl was babysitting the next night, for another guillable couple.

          This didn't actually surprise me, as I find the Portugese HATE the British tourist, and are only interested in the money they bring in. I was a fool to think I could trust these people with our precious children, and would NEVER leave them with people I don't know again.

Answer 6

ive never made a bad parenting decision ever

but then i havent got kids

Answer 7

I am trying to think if I have, but I haven't done anything that puts my child in danger, I think the only bad parenting decision I have made is allowing my son to get a drum machine, and thats because its so d**n noisy.  I have never ever done anything to endanger him, if anything I have always been over cautious, as he is without doubt the most precious person in my life.  I would never take chances with his safety, that I can say hand on heart.    

Answer 8

all parents make poor decsions sometimes as we arent robots

not one that resulted in me being a  main suspect in the case of a missing child no

i am human i make mistakes like we all do , but to go out to drink with friends and leave babies all  alone is not a mistake its a conscious decision

terrible parenting , that's an understatement

Answer 9

I make poor decisions sometimes with my kids but by and large I am very happy with how they are progressing.

Tell you this though for free... Never ever hit/smack your kids, its the lazy and cowardly way out of parenting. I got two daughters now 11 and 13 and I am proud to say I have never used physical violence against them, not ever.

Good luck to you :)

Answer 10

Nothing major springs to mind but my children would be the best to answer that and seeing as they are all happy adults, I guess I didn't do to bad. I have never left them alone without appropriate care, as that would be stupid and neglectful, as children are vulnerable and a danger to themselves. No one person is perfect but being a parent means putting your child above all and everything, which comes naturally I would have thought.

Answer 11

2 children.

Never nothing any where near those MCanns.  I would never dream of doing anything like they did, not once but on numerous occasions.

No matter how you twist it they stuffed up big time but seem to refuse to want to take the blame and continually want to blame or accuse others of failing their children.

Answer 12

HI faith keep up the good work there is a cheque in the mail for you

Answer 13

I think hundreds i'm not perfect.

Answer 14

I have certainly made a catalogue of 'stupid' or 'lousy' parenting decisions. I doubt there is a parent anywhere that feels they haven't.

I don't think I've made any truly terrible ones but the only people who can answer that will be my children when they are grown.

I personally wouldn't have left my children in that manner but I ask myself this kind of question a lot. Mine are 11 and 7 and I let them 'play out' in our road with all the other kids in the area. I am not looking at them or supervising them for long stretches.

God Forbid if anything should ever happen to them am I neglecting them? I do know something COULD happen but I assume it won't. Just the same as we could be struck by a bus or lightening.

Life is all risk and chance really. I choose to take a leap of faith(!) and give my kids a childhood.

I stand in judgement of no-one.

Answer 15

i have been on holiday and wouldn't consider leaving my dog alone in the car or tent we went places he could go or didn't go out how someone could leave 3 children , i recently read when maddie went even after this they left the twins on their own raising the alarm

Answer 16

Actually, it's hard to tell which was a good decision and which was a terrible one until they grow up. You never can tell. I think I never made a terrible decision, but how can I know until I see that they grow up into decend men? Unfortunately, I can't.

Answer 17

I don't think there's a parent out there who hasn't made a mistake...some terrible, some not.  It's all trial and error.  We do the best that we can sometimes under unbelievable circumstances.

Answer 18

Turning my back for a second to look @ the pix I had just taken of my daughter while she was in the pool (with her friends and cousins)..She had gone under and I just happened to look up ....I absolutely freaked I grabbed her out of the pool by her hair..I was lucky that she was fine and ready to go back into the pool, only this time I put the camera down and got in with her..

Answer 19

I am not a parent,That i know of anyway.

Answer 20

Everyone makes terrible parenting decisions at one point or another. There are no perfect parents.

But, the thing is that most semi-intelligent adults learn from their mistakes.

If this question is supposed to be about the McCanns (which I am guessing it is) then they should have definitely had doubts about leaving their kids alone. Especially when their little girl was crying when they went out. I mean what do you tell your baby daughter when she does that? Just go back to bed, mommy and daddy are going drinking?

Oh right, never mind...they probably just sedated her anyway.

Answer 21

No parent can answer in the affirmative on this question. All parents make mistakes, including terrible ones. Just as kids are maturing, so do parents in their new roles.

Answer 22

I have.quite a few times.Minor silly things though.

Leaving my children alone is not one of them.I don't see it as a terrible parenting decision,i see it as neglect.If some parent left a child in a room with matches and paper and that child then burned,would that be classed as a terrible parental decision or neglect?

It's the fear of knowing what could happen that makes parental responsibility work.Not making decisions based on the fact of it won't happen to us.

It wasn't a one night thing either remember,they done this often.

Answer 23

At least, I have not killed any kids and then tried to cover it up.

Answer 24

You just hope that your good and wise decisions outweigh the terrible and silly ones. You do not know until they grow up.    

Answer 25

I made lots of decisions that in retrospect I would have done differently.

I was lucky and no harm came to my son, but it could have turned out differently.

Some of the posters here have no personal experience of parenting, others apparently do it perfectly!

I am happy that my parenting was of the "good enough" variety, allowing my son and I to enjoy and survive our lives together!  

Answer 26

Worst thing I ever did was stick the poor child with a diaper pin.

Accidentally mind you.

She was fine, I was a mess.  I think I was afraid she would deflate.

Shes 42 now and doesn't hold it against me.

If I was that distraught over a pin stick, how do these mothers forget where they put the kids for weeks on end?

Answer 27

Me! 48 and no kids! WooHOO.

Answer 28

It's amazing how none of the answerers making a big mistake.  

Answer 29

I have made poor parenting decisions, but never a terrible one ie: leaving my toddler alone in a strange flat in order to go out to dinner.

NB: this DOES NOT make them murderers though.

Answer 30

I have always tried not to.

Answer 31

A terrible one? No. My decisions are for their own good as well as mine. What someone else might think is totally irrelevant to me.