How pathetic is this?

Question

i just had my daughter a lil over 2 months ago and i guess that my father was telling his new wife and my brothers gf that i am in no way capable of raising my child, that she is going to grow up in a bad home and all this junk. and that they are better able to care for my child. but how can you even think about raising a child when you dont have a steady home they go from hotel to hotel and waste their money on drugs. and they said that they dont think of my child as their grandbaby because to them im a worthless piece of s**t and a waste of time pretty much. but they cant even think bout her being their grandchild cuz i have nothing to do with them and i have hated my father since i was 5 and im 20 now. is it just because i refuse to think of his new wife as my mother? or is it just a jealousy issue because she cant raise her own kids. she has a daughter that just had a son and is now pregnant again less than 2 months after having the baby.

i live in a steady home with her father. its pathetic. why do people think like this? what would you do?? tell them to shove it up their a** and move on with their life?

Answer 1

wow, tell him he has to stop denying the fact that you are his daughter

Answer 2

I would just move on with your life. dont worry about the petty bs that your father and his girlfriend are bringing into your life. If you feel you can do it on your own then i wouldnt worry about all the crazy things they are saying... you have your own instincts... go with them  

Answer 3

people tend to talk when their jealous. Be the best you for you daughter and realize people always talk. Your job is to provide a safe loving environment for her! Ignore the rest. Keep up the good work

Answer 4

Pardon me for being blunt, but your whole family seems dysfunctional, including you.  

You're a mother now, stop being petty and immature, and concentrate on what matters - your child.

edit:  Sorry, but I call 'em like I see 'em, and your reaction just proves my point.  Whether you realize it or not, you're propping yourself up on the misfortunes of others.

Answer 5

THAT is EXACTLY what I'd do. If your father has a history of not being good with you... I'm assuming this because you hated him as a 5 year old... then who the h**l does he think he is talking about how you raise your child!?!?

ignore them and live a happy life

Answer 6

It's not worth your time. You have a beautiful new baby to worry about. You don't need to worry about grown adults running their mouths.

Ignore them. You know what you can do and how you are going to raise your baby. If they don't want to think of her as their grandchild it's their loss. I'm sure she has lots of people in her life that love her and care about her.

It's not worth it

Answer 7

Shrug it off, tell them that when they want to be a part of a family to let you know. Apparently they don't want to know their grand baby so, why should you try. If they want to try, let them, but until that point, just go on with your life. If you are in a good situation with raising your kid don't let their words bug you. Just let them say what they want and move on. Should they choose to straighten up and be family, well, maybe then you'll be able to forgive them.

Answer 8

ur soo good,but dont tell us that,tell ur dad that and they stick it  !!

hes stupid and judgmental

ppl like that are not worth anyones time,he seems as if he cant cope by himself and so he has a gf but since hes dumb himself he therefore has a stupid gf,simple and logic pretty much ;))

ur happy the way u r and thats good.

xoxo good luck

Answer 9

Pathetic. I agree, what an *** he is.

Answer 10

I would do exactly that!  You sound like you have 'escaped' from a bad situation in the family you were raised in and are doing well now with your own family.  Please do not let them bother you.  People like that are so messed up they don't even realize it and they try to mask their own insecurities by talking bad about others.  You can feel sorry for them but that's it!  Don't let people like that be involved with your life or your daughters life!  You don't need that in your life.  You're priority is your own family, not those sad people.

Have a great life and congratulations on your new daughter!

Answer 11

I know its hard but just take him like a grain of salt. he is your biological father but Im sorry 2 say not a very good one, and it takes more than blood to be a parent as we both know. if he cant be happy for you, thats his problem and not yours. and yes his life is very messed up and he has no right to say youre unfit just bc he was an unfit father being he was a s*x offender and all. I'm sorry you have to deal with him. the best thing would be to cut him off if you ask me; father or not, he sounds like a toxic person and to make it worse hes a s*x offender. I dont think it would even be good for him to be in your daughter's life so it's probably fine he does deny her. you know you will make a far better parent than he ever will/would. I hope i'm not being too harsh about your father but its just if my father was that way, I wouldn't want anything to do with him and I would be relieved he ignored my child. i think he's also jealous that you're not messing up life the way eh did/does and he expects you to turn out more like him but you didn't.

i'd say keep having nothing to do with them, they are all a bunch of unsafe, toxic people you don't need your baby to be around. if he one day wants to see your child, that is your choice, but if he doesn't, i wouldn't be sad about it since he would be a bad influence anyway. The reason why they don't think of your daughter as their grandchild is bc you have limited contact with them, which is a good thing, but that's why. as for it being about you not thinking of his new wife as your mother, why on earth would you/ you've hated him since 5, and hes suddenly married to this new woman? and suddenly you'll just like her? yeah right. I think its jealousy he couldn't raise you, but i don't think its bc she cant raise her own kids. I don't think he cares if she can or not bc he doesn't know how to raise children himself.

don't let them get to you when you know deep down you're better off than they are.

Answer 12

You don't have to tell them anything. Just go on with your life. If you can get away from them that would be good. You owe nobody an explanation of anything that you do in your own personal life. Especially them. No parent should be saying things like that to a child. That is abuse and you are grown. Don't take this personal, because it may affect how you raise your own. God speed to you and the new baby.

Answer 13

yea tell them off and forget about them u dont want that around ur kid.

Answer 14

Ignorance, when people are down, they like to drag everyone else with them!  You are at a very vulnerable stage right now, being a new mommy, You know in your heart who you are and how you are as a parent, yes it hurts to hear your family talk sh** but, f*** them, you don't need them in your baby's life or yours!  

Its easier to judge people, and not judge themselves.  hey, why not tell them to shove it up their a*** you will feel better telling.

I am sure you are a great mommy, ignore stupid ignorant people, focus on your daughter and your marriage, thats where it counts.

Good Luck and smile!

Answer 15

Take a deep breath.

I assume they didn't say this to your face so it might just be gossip.

Whomever told you that obviously doesn't care much for your feelings either because otherwise they wouldn't be trying to upset you.

I had people repeating to me things my dad was saying about me behind my back too and I told these people that what they should really do is shut my dad down when it happens and say that they're not comfortable gossiping about you.

That took care of that problem because it let the person telling me this stuff know that I thought EVERYONE was gossiping about me and how mean I thought it was.