How should I be towards him?

Question

I met a guy in college last year (Sep 2007) whom I got along with very well and became very good friends. I was not looking for love at the time, so I didn't look at him as anything more than a good friend.Then after two months, out of the blue, he said he liked me and wanted us to be friends with benefits.

I realised that I liked him too but I have never and do not intend to do friends with benefots, so I told him that. I said that I wouldn't mind trying a relationship but not FWB. Nevertheless he still tried to ask me again a few more times over the months but I always said we should just stay as friends.

We drifted apart more and more each time he asked and I declined. I couldn't believe I was losing a good friend. Before the summer break, he asked me one last time on an SMS message and I ignored him; I didn't reply. He didn't contact me again for the whole summer (two months). Now I'm thinking, he coouldn't have liked me that much if he didn't contact me ONCE during the summer. My friend said maybe he was scared to contact me again, since I ignored his SMS message.

I go back to college next week and know for a fact that I will see him. I don't know how I should be towards him.

Answer 1

If you blanked him in his last text what do you expect?  He's been rejected countless times by you and has probably given up.  Maybe he's found someone or something else to occupy his mind.  Just try and act how you usually do when you see him again.  You'll never know how to act until you see how he reacts when he sees you again.

Answer 2

First, I want to say that I think it's great that you rejected his request to be friends with benefits because it's a no-win situation, so you are right to never go there.

You stated that you wouldn't mind trying a relationship - you were honest with him. I suppose also you don't mind just continuing to be friends also, but absolutely not friends with benefits.

I say you have nothing to be embarrassed about and the fact that he just kept requesting s*x from you shows you what he wants from you. I think when you return to college, you can be friendly as you would with any acquaintance/friend because you are in the clear - you have done nothing wrong, in my humble opinion.

If he talks about what happened, you can just state again that you are not interested in friends with benefits - that you are only interested in being friends or if you are still interested in a relationship with him, you can tell him that as well - those are the 2 options and friends with benefits isn't on the agenda for you.

Answer 3

Kick him in the nuts for assuming that you are an easy lay.