How should I handle a boss like this?

Question

I have one of those bosses that no matter what you do, it isn't good enough. Her boss will come in and LOVE my department, he even said it was bar far the best he has seen company wide. Yet never a thank you or anything, just "why is THIS not done??" When I don't make my or my departments schedule, and everyone was off the day before. I've seen bosses like this befoore, and I have NEVER been that way with MY employees. I'm the " this looks great; you did a super job, however, the next time........"

She really REALLY acts like I'm stupid.

I really felt terrible yesterday when I finally had to tell her "look I couldn't do THIS because supervisor X told me NOT to" I didn't want to get another supervisor in trouble, but I am the one getting yelled at for following another supervisors orders. She said "that's just an excuse"

Any advice??

Answer 1

an older relative once said to me, "the kid that brings the football is always quarterback, no matter who throws best"

basically it means that if you want to be on your boss' team (including if you only want to continue to get paid for being on the boss' team) then you have to run his plays no matter how demeaning or ridiculous they may seem. and as for the comparative reference between his boss' opinion of you and his own, he may just be jockeying to keep his team in the high opinion of that boss and as such, be meaner to his subordinates thinking that is the way to keep things up there.

for the other thing, do what the most recent boss told you to do and remember which boss told you to do it. nobody's likely to fire you for following orders.  

Answer 2

Sorry.  There are some really good supervisors out there and some realy bad ones as well. She sounds like a perfectionist and nmicro manager. There are constructive ways to confront her behavior.  Study up! My advice, while at work is to follow her work orders, not another supervisors. You work for her. If another supervisor has any issues, send them to her, you don't work for them. I found a couple of goos web sites.  I might even go to a library and try to find a book on the subject.  Good luck

Answer 3

1. Ask to speak with her in her office.  Make sure you close the door and tell her exactly what you said here, that you find it difficult when she belittles you and never praises anything that you do.  You're trying to do the best that you can for the department, and she's either not giving you enough information about expectations or only giving you negative feedback.  Ask her right there to give you some positive feedback.

2. If nothing changes or she remains hostile, go to see her boss and tell them.

But also realize that, potentially, it's really you.  Sometimes we just don't fit in.  You might be thinking you're doing a great job but really you're falling way below their expectations, and that's why you're always getting negative feedback.

If it's taking you a long time to do your work and you're always on your cell phone or Yahoo all day, and then the work comes back missing parts, she would be justified in complaining.  When someone is paying you, work is work, after work is play time.  Make sure you're not doing things that give her reasons to shift the blame to you.

Answer 4

Talk to her boss and if it carries on tell them you want to be moved to another dep or you will leave! (They'll move you)

Answer 5

There isn't really an easy answer. Some people just act like this and probably will never change.

You could write it all down in a letter to her explaining how her behaviour is affecting you and asking her to change but I suspect that would probably wind her up even more.

You could make it official and put in a complaint against her, but again it could backfire on you and make you look like you are difficult to work with.

My advice would just be to try and not let it get to you. She's the one with the problem not you. Accept you can never please her but try to do your best anyway.

Answer 6

There is a name for your type of Boss and that is a "Bully Boss".  There is no pleasing this type of person and they enjoy bullying you.  The last job I had I worked for a "Bully Boss" and it was the most miserable experience of my life.  I stayed for 16 months before moving on.  Like you I was looking for another job and it took time before I found one.  My advice to you is to keep looking for another job because you need to get as far away from this type of person as you can - they are toxic.  No job is worth the misery this type of person can cause and since we spend so much of our time at work for the sake of our mental, emotional and physical health we should make it a priority to have a job that makes us happy.  In the meantime the best way to handle your boss is to never react, never let her know that she has upset you, never let her know that she has gotten to you, because that is what she is trying to do and by reacting you just give her the satisfaction every bully feels when they have bullied someone.  Don't give her that power.  Tell yourself that although she may be your boss, you are a better person then she is and do not lower yourself to her level.  Always maintain your dignity and rise above the antics of your boss.  I wish you the best of luck in finding a new job and hope you find one soon.  Take Care.

Answer 7

if SHE has a supervisor I'd be talking to THEM and telling them what a jacka** she is...but I fear she isn't going to change (they rarely do...) so either find a new job, find someone to talk to...or make yourself sick and angry for HER problems...