How should I handle this...it hurts?

Question

I'm a young woman with acne & very thick hair even after a super perm. I also don't care a lot about fashion. I love jeans, t-shirts, & tennis. People always point out in suddle ways about my acne. For ex., this one girl said I was pretty. I didn't believe her but said thank you anyway. Then, she starts talking about how all her friends are pretty but one of them is only pretty b/c of her mannerisms. That she has bumps all over her face & it's hard for her to get a date. Why would she say that?

Or sometimes ppl say they now someone that stopped eating greasy foods & chocolate & their face cleared right up. These are supposed to be the ppl that care about me.

Answer 1

You can never please people no matter what! They are either happy in your misery or sad when you are happy! You have to Love your Imperfections because they define who you are. And do the best you can to improve your appearance.Everyone has flaws..some people are better hiding them than others!  

Answer 2

Sometimes people who care about you don't realize they are pouring salt on a wound.

Have you seen a dermatologist about your acne?

Also the food cause is an old wives tale.  

Answer 3

First off, stop thinking of yourself as fashion challenged. You can be just as good looking as the next woman. Try a change once and see if you like it. People are naturally inclined to offer "tips" on health and beauty (women). Don't take it as an insult and don't get defensive. Just listen, say thanks and then actually take a look at yourself too. You sound like you do care about your appearance. Therefore, take comments as advice or compliments. There are products that help you cure and hide the acne simultaneously. Good luck.

Answer 4

Yeah, I know what you mean. When I was younger, I'd get "You have a pretty face," meaning that if only I'd lose weight, I'd be fabulous. Of course, if it were that easy, I wouldn't have been overweight in the first place. Looking back, I wasn't skinny, but I wasn't fat, either. Nonetheless, my family would make fun of me for being overweight, even though none of them are thin, and then when I would be down and not think I'm pretty, my father would say, often in annoyance, "The only one who thinks your not pretty, is you." Yeah, but you just said.....and now you're saying....?!

I had some acne, too, and I got the greasy foods and chocolate thing. Then they didn't know for sure that those things had nothing to to with acne, but they do now! Still, it persists.

First, you have to make sure that you've done everything you can to get rid of the acne. Have you seen a doctor? Have you tried that stuff on TV? It may be that there's nothing you can do.

You need good friends around you who know who you are and can see the beauty without looking at the acne. You have to believe that you are pretty and YOU have to see that without the acne. If the people who are saying those things are you good friends, then you need to tell them how it makes you feel. They may think they are helping and they may not realize how it hurts when they say things like that. You need to tell them. If they care about you, they will get it and stop.

Thick hair is a good thing. There are people out there who would love to have it.

Good luck to you!

Answer 5

People are so rude!!!!

You can't really change what people say, so I guess you have to be less sensitve about it. Don't let it upset you - people are probably just saying it because of their own insecurities, or they might think they are being nice.

If you aren't happy with how you look, then you could try doing some things to help - like wearing some more fashionable clothes, getting your hair cut of styled in a way that suits you, or even seeing a doctor about your acne.

But don't change if you're happy! Just learn to ignore the rude people's comments.  

Answer 6

"These are supposed to be the people that care about me" - they do care about you, even if they let you know it in their own way. If the acne doesn't bother you, just let them know firmly and change the subject.  

Answer 7

yeah people can be mean

i have acne too so i find it hard i know what u mean :(

i live with it tho

take no notice i say :)

Answer 8

Well that is terrible. Do these people ever stop to really think that you didn't choose to have terrible acne, and that they wouldn't be talking c**p if they had the same problem. It sounds like these people are not true friends, you need to find some people who love you for who you are and don't belittle you by saying things about your acne, which you can't really help.

I would say something to them for sure. Ask them why they are doing this and tell them that you thought they were true friends of yours.