How should I tell my mom a teenager [like myself] needs space from family and certain friends?

Question

Im a teenager, who is a junior in High school. My mom is a teacher so she believes in spending time with me all the time. There are times when she will allow me to hang out with my friends but its on certain limits. It has to be with a certain group of friends at a certain place and i cant go anywhere else. I am really grateful she lets me out of the house every now and then but i do have other friends that want me to hang out. The thing is that I have a friend 'Jared', hes my ex-boyfriend..but we still remain friends. Jared and i always want to meet at the skate park because its fun..i mean as a girl i want to learn to skate and even better learn from a friend...but the thing is my mom seems to not trust me and i always have to have my cousins there..my cousins are SNITCHES..and i have to be real careful because they will spread rumors within the family and it will make me look bad. So im hardly out of the house. and when i do want to go out she tells me that she wants to spend MORE time with me..and its driving me insane. Dont get me wrong I do love my mom, and i dont want to lose her but i do need space right? am i just being self-fish? should I just spend time with my mom until i graduate? or should i tell her that i need space? and how?

Answer 1

just tell her that you haven't screwed up yet and that is a sign that she should trust you.

Answer 2

Sounds like mom is just worried about you, maybe a little too much in your opinion. You definitely need to explain your situation to her, but let her down easily... these aren't the best of times and I'm sure she just doesn't want anything to happen to you. Maybe you should try to sit her down, let her know how you feel, and what it is that you're wanting to do that she's holding you back from. Maybe ease her into it, let her know that you'll do things on her terms until she trusts you to be on your own, for example- if your cousins haven't 'told' on you for anything, make sure she realizes that obviously you haven't been up to anything she needs to worry about, so maybe once in awhile you could go on your own. Don't lie to her though, about who you'll be with or where... then it will just backfire in your face for sure!

If all else fails, ask her why it is that she doesn't trust you, and feels like you need your cousins as babysitters, and what you can do to change her feelings about te situation. Good luck!