How soon should bridal shower invitations go out?

Question

I need a bit of help ladies!

I've always been of the mindset that shower invitations must be sent out 4 weeks in advance in order to give people enough time to make arrangements if they wish to attend. My friends are currently planning a shower for me within the next couple of weeks and I've heard that the shower invitations have still not gone out due to a few extenuating circumstances. At this point, I would like to ask them to cancel the shower (how rude is that?) because I really don't want people scrambling to make arrangements to attend a party in my honor. I'm really just honored that they wanted to do this for me and the support has been amazing.

I didn't request the shower and I really don't need it, but they insisted that they wanted to do it. However, I hate to see them go to all this effort when I doubt that people will be able to attend. Summer is such a busy time for everyone. What should I do, if anything?

Thanks in advance!

Answer 1

Since they are doing it for you, I think you should sit back and let it play out as it will, even if they are doing it wrong. I doubt anyone will scramble to make it. If it is too much of an inconvenience, people just won't come.

Just enjoy the shower that your friends throw. Yes, they are cutting it close, but to step in is to be critical, and this isn't the kind situation in which you can be critical and gracious at the same time. It would be rude to request they do it differently.

Answer 2

it should always be 4 weeks because you need to give your invitees time to request off if they need. never do it more then that because people tend to forget or brush it off. but a couple of weeks is cutting it close, you might not get as many people to come. how long til the wedding? if you have time still, tell your friends how you feel, can this be rescheduled?

Answer 3

How wonderful you have friends that care so much about you and are so generous!

You are correct, a shower is typically about 2 months prior to the wedding.

You don't say if a venue has been reserved for the shower, so I'm assuming it will be at someone's home, correct?

Your friends need to understand a couple of weeks is not much time.  People need time to get things in the mail, RSVP, go shopping for gifts and such.  Since you can't postpone it, and you're having doubts if people can attend, I have a couple of options:

1.  Send the invites out immediately.  Have your friends make some calls to invite people as well and get a tentative RSVP.  Let people know the invites were delayed, but are on their way.  

2.  Thank the friends profusely, but tell them it's OK to not have the shower.   Let them know you appreciate their thought, but you don't want to stress them out by trying to pull this all together with such short notice.

Hope it all works out.  Congratulations on your wedding!

Answer 4

6-8 weeks weeks before the event. but you can send them out sooner, no harm in that.

Answer 5

ask them if they can just send e-vites...much easier and people would get them right away.

Answer 6

in the mail