How to ask my hubby to be an honest person? : (?

Question

i'm 21 and my hubby 25..i've always had this difficulty to fully trust my hubby..ever since the incident when i was beaten by him violently becoz trying to cover up for his female fren,i've lost my trust for him. Before we got married, he never raise his hand on me but soon after a few mths staying together as husband and wife,i've found out he have been keeping in touch with his female fren behind my back.im not being unreasonable but he should at least tell me coz all along he told me the contact number was his male fren... when i want explaination,he will ignore me,u guys know how frustrated i am? when i force him to tell me,he tried to strangle me..that time i was 3 mths pregnant and i was very disappointed with him...all along i luv him so much tat i lost all my frens becoz of him.ive been very honest with him in everything i do but in the end it was all not appreciated.. sumtimes i do feel regret getting married at an early age. i got engaged at 17 and got married at 19. i've abandoned my freedom and youth for him in the end this is what i get from him...till now,me at 21,he still doesnt change n being honest with me...im very tired thinking of this problem..can somebody tell wat to do??

Answer 1

Why should we tell you what to do if you don't even listen to what EVERYONE TELLS YOU WHAT YOU SHOULD DO?

Here's my answer..NO ONE WILL CARE OR TELL YOU WAT TO DO unless you actually CARE TO LISTEN.  Your husband is  a piece of sh*t..everyone knows it, your friends know it, WE KNOW it and we don't even KNOW you....so if you will keep asking, and keep wondering what to do that's YOUR problem now.

Leave him leave him leave him....so what if you love him...it means NOTHING if he doesn't love you.....get it in yo head....NO DUDE LOVES SOMEONE HE CHOKES, CHEATS, AND BEATS ON...what da h**l are you thinkin woman?  Ain't no one holding you back, you ain't chained to him...there's not curse where if you leave him you can't get another man, that's just stupid bullsh*t you keep tellin yourself so you can stay and get whooped on some more.   h**l if it was SO bad that you thought your appearance matters then why not leave him and then take GOOD care of yourself?  A woman who cares about herself will have way more available men than a woman who lets herself get beat down and feel like a mouse.

Tell you wat to do...LISTEN that's what da f*ck you need to do...sh*t.

Answer 2

You can just ask him to be honest, but if you have to ask, there's a big problem.  You have a much bigger one judging by what you wrote.  He tried to strangle you, and you're still there?  You've lost all of your friends because of him?  You've abandoned your freedom?  You need to talk to a domestic violence counselor...yesterday!  Honey, you are setting yourself up for more pain and heartache than just being lied to.  I'd strongly suggest you call your local domestic violence crisis center or you can call 1-800-799-SAFE.  You seriously need to get some help and get out of there.

Praying for you.  :)

Answer 3

You need to leave, get a divorce & move back you your parents or family.  Or find a women's shelter.  You need to do whatever it takes to get yourself & your child away from him.  If not for yourself, then for your child.  If he beat you, he will beat your child.  You need to leave, get a restraining order if necessary.

Answer 4

you need to stick up for urself dnt let anyman beat you u got to leave him by not doing anything about it hes taking advantage of you get a better man live ur life better dnt get treated like c**p ur better den dat good luck on makinq ur decision

Answer 5

IS THERE REALLY ANYONE WHO YOU WILL LISTEN TO? I am sure you have heard from numerous persons to leave this incredibly abusive and horrible man. Tell us what you will listen to to make you leave?!!!!!!!!!!!

Answer 6

if he is abusing you and cheating GET OUT , or go shopping for cemetary plots, because thats where your headed.

if you cant be honest and communicate without violence, you dont have a marriage, you have slavery.

Answer 7

It seems that there is more then just a couple issues going on. a lot of the time when you are so young people have not had the opportunity to mature and grow. You can not change this on your own.counseling works about forty percent of the time (when in fact the other agrees to it). if there are children involved your first priority needs to be them. abuse does not end on it's own. There is nothing you can do to stop this by yourself. Lying does not stop either. not without help and this must be voluntary. I know you feel as though you love him yet this is more then likely a false love. I am not saying it is not love just not the kind that you need or will be happy with. I don't know what else to tell you other then you need to look at the entire manuscript of your life and re-evaluate it. If what I said is not what you wanted to hear I am sorry. The only other advice I can give you is find a GOOD  moment and let him know you want to make a better life for the both of you. Please do not take the last advice. take the first. I KNOW it to be true. Take care of yourself.....

Answer 8

stop checking up on him its a waste of time.  stop asking him if you know he lies.  And just take all that wasted energy and time and invest it in leaving him,  that's what you should do.