How to deal with alcoholic problems?

Question

well, it's getting to the point where I don't want to deal with any of his **** (my dad) and just want to get a life of my own without having to deal with this. He drinks all day, goes in and out of jobs, doesn't pay any attention to his children (me, mostly), doesn't even think that any of us in the family is affected by dumb things he's done. There's so much anger inside I can't find a reason why I should be happy or okay with all of this. Help, how do I deal with it and make him realize all the things that are affecting me. I am in therapy but it is slow going and hard to find therapist that understands.

Answer 1

he sucks. talk to a school counselor.

Answer 2

well, if u cant beat em, join em (so start drinking). It's okay to get drunk, it's the way of life

Answer 3

You didn't say what the therapist does not understand.  If your therapist is ignorant to the fact that you live with an alcoholic and what it's like to live that sort of life, and the effects it has on the family, maybe it's time for another therapist.

I think that, when we live with alcoholics, we become as sick as they are.... our thinking becomes skewed, and we do carry around a lot of anger... i'm speaking from experience, because my father is also an alcoholic.

I think that you might find some support and get good help and advice by attending Alateen or Alanon meetings.  hasn't your therapist recommended this?  

Most communities offer many meetings per week, and it's not difficult to find them.  You can look at the website listed below for information and also telephone Alcoholics Anonymous in your area for more information... you can find the number in the phone book, or call information.  

If and when you attend these meetings you will find you are NOT alone in your situation -- i hope you will go.

Answer 4

I hope this will help you.  I have been in Al Anon for four years.  This is a spin off of AA. Al Anon is for those of us who are affected by the alcholics in our lives.  We come together to learn  the 12 steps taken from AA to help US not the Alcholic.

We learn that (this is called the 3 C's) We didn't CREATE the SITUATION, We CAN'T CHANGE THE SITUATION, and We DIDN'T CAUSE THE ALCHOLIC TO DRINK.  

The Upper Case is for not shouting at you, it is just one of the slogans that Al Anon uses to encourage us to get healthy in spite of the alcholic in our lives.

I don't know your age.  There is also a group called Al Ateen, just look in your local phone book, there are meetings everywhere at local hospitals, churches within your community, they are free.  Once you have gone to a meeting your will come to realize you are not alone in your anger.  There are many of us out there and we know how you feel and can help you.

Please give it a try.  There is also a 1 800 number in your local phone directory that is called a Hot Line that you can call for more help and assistance.  You can google Al Anon and enter your city and state and find a local chapter.  There should be a phone number, and listing of the time and place where a meeting will be taking place.

I hope this information will help you.  I grew up surrounded by alcholics and thought that was how everybody's household was, boy after going to my first Al Anon meeting I found out how disfunctional my life really was as a kid.

I am 53 years old and now I know that alchol ripped my childhood from me.  It damaged my soul, made me a very angry person and I didn't know why until four years ago.

Good luck to you.  Don't allow someone to take your happiness away from you.  Try Al Anon give yourself a chance.

Answer 5

try talking to him.tell him its you or his alcoholic. hope he picks you. my dad had pick alcoholic over me and my brother.

Answer 6

Sweetie. I'm in the same situation... But cept' it's my brother... My dad is an Recover alcholic Anyways, You nor your mom or anyone can make him stop. Only he can stop for himself. I know what your going through, & I know, how your feeling. I've dealt with this since I was 8. & It's just getting worser. I've tried talking to my brother all about this tell him how I feel it doesn't work at all. Maybe, your dad is depressed about something. My brother is depressed right now.. So. Him being depressed is probably why, he is drinking all the time. When he's ready he'll get help. I know it hurt's because he's your dad. But, only he can stop for himself when he's ready to change.